Twenty
1154 Words
Twenty: Say yes out of kindness, say no to the greatest desire?
> >> >>
“I've kept this for a few months now.
I planned on giving it to you on the day of our third year anniversary, but my impatient ass cannot wait that long. Two weeks is not long at all, but I cannot wait two weeks to make this promise to you. When it comes to you, even two hours or two minutes is long enough.”
I could clearly hear that the words he was using were meant to be romantic, and I should have been moved but I was already panicking for my own reasons here, so I could not even focus on the romantic or sweet aspect of his words, because all I was hearing was “there is no way you are breaking up with me now!”
“ Please don't tell me you're asking me to marry you, Josh.” I said to him nervously and he just laughed.
He was laughing and all that was happening to me was a slow death. My entire body was already trembling and I just wanted to run away.
“Dani, and what would be so bad about that?” He questioned and immediately I felt my heart sinking to my stomach, the guilt immediately consumed me .
This could not actually be happening right now.
I was supposed to be breaking up with him right now. Why was he giving me a ring? The more that I looked at the ring, the prettier it looked. I should have been ecstatic if I loved him as much as he loves me but I could not be happy right now.
“This is a promise ring, Dani! It is a promise ring because I am going to ask you to marry me, very soon. I contemplated buying an engagement ring, but I have not saved up enough to get you the one that you deserve.”
He said to me before he smiled at me and pulled the ring out from its box. I could feel the tears swelling in my eyes. They were threatening to fall and ruin my makeup.
“ Josh…” I could not even say anything other than that because everything just stopped my brain ceased to function and I really felt like there was nothing else that I could do apart from stare at him in absolute astonishment.
“This is me making a promise to you that I will love you forever and hope that you will accept my love for as long as I'm alive. You better outlive me, okay?” he said to me before he reached for my hand.
“Do you accept it?” He questioned and I just swallowed hard before I felt the heat of the tears rolling down my cheeks.
“ Don't cry.
You'll break my heart. Are you that happy?” He questioned and even though it was the exact opposite of that, I just nodded my head.
“I'll accept it.” I said to him, the panic setting deep in.
Honestly, this was actually serious. Even James had not done this yet and here I was being offered a promise ring when my intention today was to actually break up with him. I felt so much guilt that I actually could not even breathe right.
He hugged me before Kissing me on the lips.
“Babe, don't cry so much. Your makeup!” he said to me and I slowly smiled at him.
“ It's okay, It's worth this moment.” I said to him before I just nibbled on my bottom lip.
I am such a horrible liar, but right in this moment, he surely did not see it at all. It just appeared that when it comes to how much I love him, he was always blind to that. Yes, at first I really thought it could work, at first.
I was really into him but after Brittany and Anthony broke up my mind was quickly fixed on him yet again. My fixation was everlasting and now here I was tying myself to Josh through this ring.
“ No, I feel bad.
I feel like you should have a ring as well!” I said to him and he just smirked at me.
“See? I told you I know how you think. I bought myself a ring as well.” He admitted, flashing his pearly whites.
I playfully smacked him on his shoulder for being such a sweet bastard.
“ These look expensive!” I said to him and he nodded his head. “Yes, they were. I have a lot of money to pay back to my mother after this.” he admitted, laughing and I really couldn't believe that he was actually being so calm about this.
He had spent his money. He had poured all his heart into this. How on earth was I supposed to break up with him after this?
How on earth was I supposed to forget about him? About Anthony as well?
I mean, that Should have been an option, but it certainly wasn't. My crush on him grew stronger every single day of anything if anything I wanted to see what would happen if I threw myself at him again, as ridiculous as that sounded. And instead of thinking about the happy future that I will have with Josh, that is exactly what I was thinking about.
How on earth was I going to get it out of him? How on earth was I going to make sure that I know exactly where I stand with him? I refused to give up because that look in his eyes, the bulge in his underwear. Those were all adding up telling me one thing that he surely is attracted to me even if it is only a slight attraction. We could always work on making it an even stronger attraction.
“We shouldn't eat too much But have whatever you want before we go back to the party. We'll pack up the rest.”
He said to me before I nodded my head and lost my appetite entirely. There was a nice fruit basket and picnic platter right in front of me. The setup was beyond beautiful and I had not even taken a single picture to document this moment.
I actually remember that and took a picture to send it to Celine even though that really felt like it was not a good idea. It was not a good idea to Get her into thinking that She could actually have the wedding she dreamed of because I doubted that it would happen at this point.
I had no idea what tomorrow held after this. I could be without this ring in two weeks, who knows?
- Writer
