Misery loves Murder

Meeting Billy Macbel

Later that night the apartment building was surrounded by fire trucks and ambulances. The firemen desperately tried to extinguish the flame while many tenants were still inside the inferno. I laid on a stretcher with my eyes half closed, my left hand was severely burned and a great deal of my hair had turned to ash.

As I saw the flames taking up even more of the building, burning it all entirely, that's when I felt happiest I've ever been. I felt euphoric even with my injuries. I felt no pain but only the excitement of what's to come. I was free! I wanted to sing and dance and kiss and feel love again.

"You should try not to move." the paramedic told me as they loaded me in the ambulance.

I wanted to stay and see it all with my own eyes but sadly if I did perhaps I wouldn't see the light of day.

A few moments earlier I saw Arthur's cold body one last time laying on the carpet with blood fed clothes. Even in death he seemed in pain, his eyes wide open and his neck turned dark red. I took out some kerosene from the room heater and spread it across his body and then whatever remained in its tank I spread it all across the room's furniture and on the bed.

I gave it one last longing glance before burning the room and the whole apartment.

It caught fire in an instant and the cold from my body quickly rushed away. I felt warm and loved as if I was back in my husband's embrace, his hands tied around my back and the warmth of his body brought me comfort. It didn't last long however, as I felt flames burning my clothes and Arthur's burning body smelled of rust. I quickly left the room, my hands still on flames. If I were to simply leave unscrach it would've brought me trouble so I let it burn for a while before calling the ambulance. Witnessing the flames someone might have called the fire department but thankfully they were a bit too late.

When I woke up after the incident, I laid on a hospital bed, my hands and head heavily bandaged and a bottle of blood hanging over my head. It had a small tube with a needle stabbed into my veins.

I lost a lot of blood it seemed.

I simply looked out the window to the side of my bed, the sun seemed to be setting so it's at least been a whole day. I lifted myself up and sat down on the bed, and even as I remember the horrible thing I had done yesterday I felt nothing but the faintest bit of happiness but even that happiness felt fleeting as if the joy it brought me was no longer there. I slowly started to feel empty again, with my mind and my body both in this terrible shape. How could've i've been happy, that's what I told myself. But in reality I felt empty not because of the state of myself but because the thrill of what I had done had already washed away never to return again.

"Anna?" a familiar voice called out to me.

I turned around to see it was Emma holding a rose, she stood still on the entrance frozen like ice, her eyes were red and her face had marks of dried up tears. The very next second she burst into tears, her hands clamped around her eyes and she started sobbing like a child.

As I saw her in that state, in the miserable state that she was in, only one thought appeared to me.

At least that's not me. It felt comical, almost like a comedy sketch. I wanted to burst out laughing and laugh at the face she made but for the sake of the least human decency I resisted the urge.

"Emma, you should sit down." I said, I tried getting out of bed but the pain from the needle stuck in my arm made me decide against it.

She slowly approached a chair near the end of the bed and sat down, still sobbing, holding onto that dear rose.

"Anna.." she laid her hand on top of mine. "I'm so glad you are okay." I feel her tense nerve through her wavy hands.

"I'm fine, don't worry." I assured her, she seemed just the slightest bit relieved, she withdrew her hand and with a napkin washed away her tears. Her sobbing didn't stop but tears no longer flowed from her eyes.

"What about Arthur?" I asked, I couldn't help it.

I felt a sudden rush of blood in my body as I saw her face drop all colors. She clenched her teeth in an attempt to stop crying, then she looked at me trying to form words but she failed and once again her eyes began to tear.

"Sorry, you don't have to say it." I said, I saw his body burning with my own eyes, I didn't need her assurance. The thrill of the situation started to get to me and my breaths grew heavier and my mind was on fire. I felt like dancing. But as long as she remained close to Me, I had to resist the urge to laugh and to enjoy myself.

"I'm sorry, Emma but do you have a smoke?" she simply nodded, her head facing downwards she reached into her purse.

"You shouldn't smoke though." she said, turning to face me. I gave her the most pretentious weak smile and said.

"We both need a break right now." she forced her lips shut and nodded before handing me a cigarette and taking out one for herself. As she lit the cigarette I remember the sight from yesterday, it wasn't a lighter that I used but a match and yet the very act of Bruning something with fire reminded me of it.

We smoked our cigarettes in silence for a bit before a nurse came in to check my bandages.

She lectured us about smoking in the room but didn't go too harsh considering the circumstances. After she was done redoing the bandages and explaining to me how to take my meds we were once again left alone.

Perhaps the change in atmosphere had give Emma a bit of time to regain her composure again, she looked as if she was no longer sure of where she was.

"You know." she turned to me once again.

"I didn't even get his body, it burned to ash they say." I could see the sorrow in her eyes but she was handling it much better than before.

"I'm sorry." I said, I felt no regret and no need to apologize but those words were perhaps the only thing that I could've said.

"No no" she fanned her hands and scoffed.

"I think it's better this way." she looked at me, I wasn't sure if she was actually okay with it or that's just how she wanted to cope with it.

"I mean I don't know how I would've handled it if I saw him all burned up a-and I wouldn't be able to" she hissed, holding back tears.

"See his face, I don't think I could've handled that.

Even as tears flowed down her face, she handled it much better than before.

"It's okay and I'm sorry." she looked up, I held her hand and told her this.

"I'm sorry for not being able to cry."

I didn't know how she was gonna take it but what she said surprised even me.

"You don't have to, you've lost plenty of yourself."

We weren't belittling each other's sorrow, we simply weren't forcing it on each other. We have lost a part of ourselves and that makes you empathetic to others' pain.

As we shared this moment, we didn't notice someone standing just by the door.

When I finally looked in the direction it made my heart jump.

"Anna Rhodes, I'm officer Billy Macbel and I'm here to ask you some questions." he said looking at his notepad.

He wore a blue suit and appeared more like a businessman than any cop. His hair was combed backwards and he had a sagging triangular face. If I were to meet him on the street I would've thought he was either in the military or some secret service. He just had an air about him that said he was anything but an officer.

"What? Why?" said Emma, getting out of her chair and standing in front of the man.

He took a step back before letting out a sigh.

"Standard procedure, everyone involved and everyone living in the apartment will be going through the same" he explained, setting his hand on Emma's shoulder he slightly pushed her to the side.

"Anna Rhodes, you are the only survivor from the third floor fire.” he looked at me as if he knew everything I had done.

"Now whether you were fortunate or unfortunate will really depend on this interview" the way he said it, I felt somewhat scared.