Y-FIE (Your Flame Is Emanating)

End Marks the Beginning

I woke up to the smell of earth and rain. Another more day passed, but I'm still stuck. The world keeps moving on but mine's gone. Each day it's getting harder to wake up. I'm not sure if it's because I'm sleepless or if I'm already gone. Everyone around me seems to think that I'm doing just fine, but I'm really lifeless. I've been dragging myself to work for a year now. I guess? It feels more like forever. I wanted to be fine but nothing worked. I'm running out of ways to feel alive. I wanted to leave it all behind but... That's not really what I want. It's not how I wanted to live my life. Same old, same old, I guess.

She looked out of the window and breathed in the smell of mist. "Strange. But it's good." She sat right out of her bed with eyes closed. The thoughts of last night flashed back to her. How serious her friends' faces were. How foolish she has acted. The forced smiles her sisters made. How insensitive she might have been considering that Luna's sister was there. And how delusional she had been. She's trying to make sense of her encounter. 'Her image was blurry, but her voice was heavy. Was it just me? Was it another of my illusions?'

A knock on the door breaks her out of her dilemma. "I'm coming in..." Unisus, entered.

"Hey..." She said.

"Hey" Alba replied.

"How are you doing?" Unisus, said warmly.

"I'm fine, I guess."

"I love to hear that, sis."

"I know there have been a lot of things happening to me lately, but I want you to know how thankful I am that you're around."

"I have been longing to hear that from you, sis."

"I can see how much you all have been putting up with me."

"And I'm sorry I can't be of any help." Alba said painfully. "But I want to make sure you know how grateful I am to have you all around."

"Sis... I love you."

"You know just seeing you OK is more than enough for me." Unisus almost tear up saying that. The weight on her has been lifted. "Let's get over this drama. I got something for you." She said enthusiastically.

"Guys, I know you heard that. Bring your crying faces over here hahaha!" She screamed at the door.

"Babe, do you really have to say that?" Shera said.

"Oh! Someone's trying to be tough." Unis replied

"Hahaha!"

One by one, they started entering the room... Alba was shocked by the steady stream of her friends entering her room with indescribable expressions.

"Alba..." her best friend spoke longingly.

"Sorry for worrying you too." Alba said with a welcoming smile.

"Hey..." Travi greeted him. His face shows traces of tears being deprived of falling on his cheeks. "I'm not crying... Just so you know."

"Oh yeah?" Linneaus said heartily. "You just feel the need to say it out to the world, isn't it?"

"Leave me alone, Linn." He laughingly brushed him off.

"I want to be better for all of you..." Alba said sincerely with a bright smile.

'I have to be strong, my dear self.' She said to herself.

As the room fills with laughter, Alba searches for a missing person." Is she home today?" Everyone starts to notice Alba's reaction. 'I hope I didn't make her mad. I really hope...' she murmurs. She looks down and plays with her nails... 'She's the closest thing to Luna that's left with me. She's a sister to me too...'

"Haahhhh" Linneaus breaks the silence.

"Could you please quit that and enter the room?!" Travi boiled up.

"Come on now, Iya." Linneaus called.

"We'll get back to cooking once we're done here!" Zoe added.

"Stop burning things, Iyaaaa!" Shera shouted teasingly.

"Oh give me a break! I'm coming over now!" Actias answered.

"I hope she's OK." Alba said, feeling satisfied.

"Oh, she is more than OK. She can even burn the whole house!" Shera continued the teasing.

"Shut it, Shera..." Actias feeling irritated.

"Hey, sis..." Actias finally entered the room. "Since I burnt your favorite cake... I just stick to your favorite dessert..." She said proudly.

"Chocolate sundae!!!" Alba exclaimed like a child.

"That's not all of it, sis---" her sister interrupted.

"We're having dinner tonight!!!" Zoe exclaimed.

"Oh, you just can't help it!" Travi said.

Zoe's excitement filled the room with laughter once more.

"You don't have to get up now."

"Take more rest, and we'll take care of this." Shera said

"We'll let you know once it's done." Unisus assured her

"And I'll make sure to keep this little thing in check." Linneaus placed his arms over Actias' shoulders and took her to the door. "Will you get off of me, Linneaus?! I haven't seen her reaction yet!!!

"Oh, trust me, she won't eat it."

"Of course she will!"

"This tastes good, Iya! I love it!" Alba reassured her.

"Alright!!! Glad you liked it." Alba responded with a smile.

"I'll stay here for a bit." Zoe addressed them. "Shera, I'll leave you the kitchen. Watch out for the little one. Hahahaha!"

"Harsh!" Actias stomped the floor lightly. "But I love you both! Don't get into a fight, OK?"

"You just can't let it go. Hahahaha!"

"Comeback is real! Hahahah!"

"Such a cute girl."

Actias closes the door silently as she sends them kisses.

"How have you been holding up?" Zoe went back to their interrupted conversation. Alba just smiled at her, but you could see her eyes going through a lot of thoughts. Maybe finding the best thing to say. "I hate making you guys worried..." She finally said.

"You know that we're here for you no matter what. Of course, we will always care! However, painful it may be, we're in this together."

She glanced at her and search her eyes to make sure she was telling the truth. It's been too hard for her to shrug off her worries and forget the thoughts of Luna. It was never her intention to re-open their wound from losing her. But her mind can't forget. It just would not forget the years of them together. The words she has never said. The feelings she has never confessed. And she has never known it existed. 'It may be too late now, but I still want to meet her. Just one more time.'

"Say, Zoe? If I tell you what's really going on, however crazy it is, would you at least just hear it out?"

"Babe, you know I worry about you. All these things you're saying and everything going on. It's just too hard to leave you alone on your own thoughts. I understand that it's hard. It's hard for us too. But what more can we do? I want you to at least be fine, even for a little. I can't afford to lose you both now." She started crying. "I can't lose you both!" She wails in desperation, trying to express her thoughts. "But I will listen to whatever it is and I will not judge you. All I want is for you to be fine. That's what we all want, and we will do our best to make it happen." She sobs after each sentence. "Just please promise me you will try harder." She's still sobbing while trying to control her emotions.

"I promise you I will, and I have been doing my best."

She nodded accordingly. "Now let me hear it."

Alba took her deepest breaths as she collected her thoughts. "I know I can find her. And everything I told you is real. This doesn't make sense, and I know that. Because in all honesty, this will only make sense to me, and I am the only one who witnessed it. I would not expect you to understand. Don't get me wrong. I'm not taking it against you."