Alpha Mate bond

5

Aiyana sat up on her bed that morning, unable to get the thoughts from days before off her mind. She wanted to feel free, unhinged just like Ardeth. Ardeth had dived headfirst into the ocean and swam long and hard until she found shore. She didn’t want to wait on any help and she knew one way to go about that was to do what Ardeth advised: go somewhere new.

The only other place she knew besides Tamery was Micel’s Groove where her grandmother had moved to. Her grandmother had been living with them for years before she decided that the hustle and bustle of Tamery wasn’t for her anymore and she needed a change. One Aiyana was currently seeking. Aiyana hadn’t gone there to visit before. Ever since her grandmother left their town, her parents hadn’t suggested visiting, resorting to calls and texts alone.

She knew what she had to do, but she wasn’t sure of how to bring it to her parents. They were amazing people and it wasn’t their fault she had grown to become a sheltered adult, finding solace in her bedroom, that was all on her. Still she worried about what they were going to say about her travelling hours away from home. It was by far the furthest she had gotten away from Tamery.

She paused her actions, pulling her covers off and chuckling to herself. “I’m 24 and I still want to ask for permission to leave home? What’s wrong with me?”

Though she knew there was nothing wrong with her, she still felt the need to ask herself that question. How had she gone so long without taking charge of her life? There was no answer to it. At first it had just happened that she moved back home after graduation, but it had been years since that happened and she still relied on her parents. Even with the responsibilities and bills of the house, she wasn’t pulling her weight. She felt like a burden.

Aiyana pulled herself off her bed, going into the bathroom and staring at her reflection in the mirror with a heavy sigh. Her raven locks was matted on the right side which she slept on, her cat eyes bored holes into her through the mirror, flecks of blue in the green of her eyes. Her lips were dry, cracked and stained with bits of red from how hard she had been chewing on them.

She looked like a mess. A sloppy, unsteady mess, not the manageable kind.

She knew that which was why she got to work, rubbing the already gone sleepiness out of her eyes and adjusting her foot on the rug. She pulled her toothbrush off the rack, brushing her teeth as she wondered if a change would make everything better. Of course, she had done different things over the years, going to the beach for inspiration, listening to music, all of the things self help books suggested. None of them had worked for her. Even with her dreams of being a published author, there was still a part of her that felt out of reach. Lost, moving with the flow of the wind; directionless.

She had barely managed to grab a hold of herself so she couldn’t understand how she was meant to reach out to that part of her. Her mind worked on overdrive while her body carried out the routine for the day. It was only when she had showered, moisturised, dressed up and was touching her powder that she realised she wasn’t conscious of her actions.

Those moments happened to her too much and even though her parents told her it was normal, she was still pretty spooked out by it. The act being normal didn’t make it any less strange to her. Aiyana sighed as she pulled away from the mirror and walked down the stairs to be with her family. She still had her bedroom slippers on and it made a slapping sound as she walked down the stairs.

“Hey honey.” Her mum greeted, kissing the side of her head as she rounded the table. “Sleep well?”

“Good morning, mum. I slept well.” She replied, looking at the table and inhaling the scent that filled the air. “This looks delicious, mum.”

“Oh stop it.” Her mum said bashfully, waving the napkin in her hand. With a hand on her hip, she walked to the base of the steps and called, “Williams? Williams!”

“Yes?!” Her yelled back from his study before stomping out.

“Don’t you dare frown at me. Get down here before breakfast gets cold.” She scolded, waving the napkin again.

Her dad rolled his eyes, walking down the stairs and pressing a kiss to her lips despite the scowl that rested on her face. “Good morning, beautiful. Now why do you have your knickers in a twist?”

Aiyana snorted, looking away when she felt her mother’s glare. It ran through her body and she knew any more laugh would leave her with a napkin on her head or no tasty treats. She couldn’t have that.

“In a twist, uh? We’ll see about that. Go back to your study and come make your breakfast when you’re ready.”

Aiyana didn’t hold the chuckle that escaped her lips. “Mum, please, pardon dad. For me?”

She wasn’t asking for his sake but for hers. There were mornings like this one when her mother made pancakes, bacon, eggs, toast and smoothies at once. Those mornings weren’t ones to be missed and dad definitely looked sad that he was going to miss breakfast.

“Yes, Marie. Pardon dad.” He said, giving her his best puppy eyes, which rarely worked, but her mum always gave in anyway. He was also the only one who called mum by her first name.

She scoffed, turning to the table without a word. He followed behind her, settling at the table and scooping some pancakes for himself. The pancakes were mostly for Aiyana and her dad, leaving the toast for her mum. Often though, like today, they took toast as well. It was a full buffet and they wanted to eat as much as they could. Aiyana was already wolfing down the contents of her plate before her mum finished dishing the food.

It smelt and tasted heavenly.

She kept eating as her parents made small talk and when they were finally done with breakfast, she decided it was the right time to let them know what she was thinking. Though it took Ardeth springing it up on her, but the more she thought about it, the more she wanted to do it. It wasn’t such a bad idea after all. If it was going to help her get over whatever was going on with her, then it was worth a shot.

“Mum, dad, there’s something I need to tell you,” she said, her eyes fixed on the plate in front of her.

She didn’t want to accept it though, but there was still the feeling of fright when she had to tell her parents something. It wasn’t even that they cared too or gave her an attitude, she was just like that, already assuming the worst before she even got her words out. Breathe, Aiyana, she muttered to herself.

She peeled her eyes open to see her parents looking at her expectantly. She hadn’t even realised she had shut her eyes. Slowly, she exhaled, letting the air through her lungs and prepare herself for the decision she had thought over.

“I want to travel to where uh, grandma is.” She said, before looking up with wide eyes. “Just for a visit. I don’t mean that I’m moving all the way over there or anything. I need a change of environment, that’s all, nothing more. You don’t need to worry.”

Her dad chuckled and placed his hand over hers. “Relax, kiddo. Whenever you get into a ramble like that, it shows how long it took you to reach a decision. This must have been a hard choice, uh?”

She frowned thinking about the trait he mentioned that she wasn’t even aware of. Aiyana felt like she had only rambled to make them understand better what she meant. Looking at them though, she realised she had nothing to worry about. Their eyes were relaxed, though a little sad.

“Aiyana, you’re a woman of your own now,” her mother started, looking directly in her eyes, “you shouldn’t be scared to make your decisions. Adults make their decisions and you are one too. If you want something, say it confidently and without fear. I can’t exactly stop a 24 years old woman from leaving my house now, can I?”