Closure, Growth

1382 Words
Chapter 8 I found closure. I've processed my emotions and moved on which the reason why I felt indifference when I saw Owen at the shopping center. There was no hatred or anger in me, and I was happy that seeing him didn't ruin my man's special day. It was his 26th birthday, and I went to town to find something that I could gift him with. On his birthday we had a braai at his house with his family. His sister was busy throwing some nasty comments at me and saying that his brother could do better. Their father, Mr. Ricardo Garcia, asked her about her behavior and attitude towards me. She kept quiet, and her father was like, "JESSICA, I don't want to repeat myself." He kept on scolding her, but my mind was not there; it was stuck on her name. It sounded familiar, and now that I remember that I heard that name years back, that's how I knew that this Jessica is Owen's girlfriend. The following day, I sat down with Leroy and told him that her sister is the very same girl who Owen cheated on me with. We never talked or fought, so I didn't understand her outburst. Leroy said I shouldn't worry about her causing us problems because he will not allow that. That was the last time we talked about that but I was not comfortable in her presence because she was acting weird. The moment I move from where I was she would go there. I did not know her intentions or plans but I knew she was up to no good so I stopped visiting when she is around. Months passed and Leroy told me about his sister complaining that I'm the reason behind her break up with her boyfriend. I didn't know what she was on about and I didn't care. Whatever happen between her and her boyfriend who I think It's Owen doesn't concern me. I won't say I found my happily ever after but I am currently happy and Jessica is a non- factor. Chapter 9 Paradiso is growing; he has three branches here in SA, three in Italy, and two in Germany. He said he wants me to see where he grew up and where his father's roots are. So in two weeks we will be flying to Italy and then Germany.I lied to my mother that I am meeting someone overseas who will invest in my dance club, she knows about it and that it comes from my boyfriend who she hasn't met. I know she knew that I lied but as long as she allowed me to go. I was scared of flying, but I had to face my fears. I was so happy when we landed in Rome Fiumicino (FCO). I never heard or read about it before, but I was there; I took pictures to prove that I was not dreaming. The only thing I knew is that Rome is the capital city of Italy; other than that, I knew nothing. I thought I passed stages where I would get angry, sad, and hurt. I thought now is my happy time, but no, life didn't promise anyone a smooth ride. Life is full of ups and downs, twists and turns. It's how we navigate these challenges and uncertainties that defines us. It was a week after we settled here in Milan, one of the most beautiful cities in Italy. Almost everywhere we go, we will meet his 'ex s*x buddies,' which is what he called them. I was mad at how they would try by all means to get his attention right in front of me. Such disrespect but my man never gave them attention they were seeking. We met this other lady whose name I learned is Camilla. Leroy was giving her a lot of attention. The way she was so special, he would even invite her on our dates and outings. I was so devastated, shattered, and broken. The pain ran deep, leaving a lasting impact. I couldn't do anything about it, not even confront him. I mean, I am not even in Africa. What will happen to me if he gets angry and kicks me out? The rest of my visit here was overshadowed by what happened. I think he saw that I was not enjoying myself anymore because when I told him that I would love to go back home and we would visit Germany some other time, he just sighed and agreed. We went back with a sour mood or perhaps I was the only one with that mood but one thing I know is that I am not going to Germany with him not after the events happened here. It's been a week since we came back from Italy, and I've been keeping myself busy at the studio. I didn't even want to give him my time; he's not worth it. I was not even sure if I still wanted to be with him anymore because it seemed like he didn't see anything wrong with what he did. He never said anything about what occured in Italy with his italian girl. I was not going to act like it doesn't hurt, but I was not going to allow pain to destroy me like it once did. Lesson learned... rise above it this time. I am not so little anymore; I've grown from the ashes. Now I know my worth, and I'm not worth the same pain destroying me twice. It's been a month and a few weeks since we broke up. The first two weeks he kept on calling me several times; I would decline and block his calls. What happened is that I asked him about his relationship with Camilla; he said she's his varsity friend. I asked him why he would invite her into everything we did together and why she was having s****l talks with him, which he also engaged in, not minding my presence. He came up with some nonsense explanation that that's how they live, so I told myself that I was not going to dictate how he should live his life with his "varsity friend," so I made things easy by ending things with him. CHAPTER 10 Last month was eventful for me. Not only did I get my periods, but I also met Leroy's parents. They asked about their son's whereabouts, mentioning it's been over a month since they've seen him and his phone has been going straight to voicemail. I had to admit that I didn't know where he was, which wasn't entirely untrue given that we'd broken up two months prior. I did have my suspicions, though - I think he might be in Milan with his girlfriend. However, I tactfully kept that to myself during our conversation. As I sat on my couch, staring blankly at the wall, I couldn't help but feel a sense of emptiness. The breakups had left me feeling lost and alone. I had given my all to the relationships, and in the end, it hadn't been enough. I thought about all the times I had compromised, all the times I had put their needs before mine. And for what? So they could leave me without a second glance? I felt like I was wandering through a fog, unsure of which direction to take. Every step I took felt like a step into the unknown. But as I sat there, something inside of me shifted. I realized that I had a choice to make. I could let the breakup define me again, or I could use it as an opportunity to find myself. I started small. I took long baths, letting the warm water soak away my worries. I read books that I had been putting off for months, losing myself in the stories and characters. I started journaling, writing down my thoughts and feelings, trying to process everything that had happened. As I focused on myself, I began to notice things that I had neglected during the relationship. I had lost touch with my hobbies, my passions. I started to reconnect with the things that brought me joy. I started with photograph, painting, began to explore new places and dancing again. BriðgetWorðs
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