LIFE UNSCRIPTED

Renewed Purpose

Chapter 4

The night was long because he was not

a talking type, just a few words here

and there, or maybe that's what I

thought. Later on he introduced me to

his two friends and their partners.

They all seemed and sounded so

experienced about b**m because

apparently those friends are Doms to

the girls who are Subs to the men.

Leroy happens to also be a Dom

(dominant), but he currently doesn't

have a sub (submissive). I prayed that

he would not think of making me his

sub. I am a tall girl, and back then I

was thin, so he was too big for me.

My prayers did not work out for me

because in the morning, before he

insisted on taking me back to where I

stay, he told me that he wanted me to

be his sub, but only if I was willing to.

He set up a dinner date where he

explained everything important about

a Dom and Sub. I honestly didn't mind

having a boyfriend who would have a

bit of dominance in him, but now it

was a whole Dom, not a boyfriend, so I

kindly refused.

I kept on visiting Paradiso Club; it's an

Italian name that means paradise.

Apparently the owner is from Italy,

and he opened few clubs here in South

Africa. One night as I was sitting and

watching male strippers doing what

they are paid to do, I was approached

by a bouncer who told me that the

owner was asking for my presence in

his office. I was scared, but I kept on

going up to the 4th floor, where the

offices of the club are.

When we got to the 4th floor, one

could hear the sound of my beating

heart. That's how scared I was. We

were permitted to enter this huge

office with dark walls and a touch of

red. I felt like I was in the devil's

house, ready to be devoured by evil

spirits. Minutes later, I was greeted by

someone with a deep, sexy voice,

which instantly turned me on, and I

faced him. I was shocked to be met by

Leroy Garcia.

To be honest, I was expecting some

white guy who does seem like

someone from other countries. So

Leroy is the boss here, but wait, why

am I here? Because I thought we had

no business whatsoever between us.

Well, there is only one way to find out.We greeted each other, and he went

straight to the reason why he called

me. He didn't make sense at first, but I

understood that he wanted me to be

his woman and patient with him as he

will learn to be my man, not my Dom.

When he said women, that's where it

clicked to me that I am 18 years old

and I am with someone who might be

a decade older than me. I agreed to be

his woman like he said, and I found

out a month later that he was 24 years

old. He was trying so hard at being a

boyfriend. I was able to see that he is

used to being dominant but trying to

fight it off by letting me challenge him

and make decisions sometimes.

Months passed, and I was 19 years old.

I was still dating Leroy, whose mother

is Black and the father is Italian. He

was born here but grew up in

Germany since his father was working

there until he was 16 years old, when

they moved to Italy, his father's home.

He knows few of the South African

languages, so we do not always

communicate in English.

Chapter 5

Renewed purpose. I feel like I am

discovering a new sense of direction or

meaning in life . As I looked back on

the darkest moments of my life, I

realized that they had paved the way

for a brighter moments. The pain and

heartache had given way to growth,

self-discovery, and a newfound

appreciation for life.

I realized that the wrong crowd had

almost cost me everything – my

relationships, my self-respect, and my

future. But I was grateful for the

lesson. I knew that I would never

forget the experience, and that it

would shape me into a better person.

The storm had passed, and the sun was

shining brighter than ever before. I

had learned to find beauty in the

brokenness, and strength in the

struggle. My story was no longer

defined by the heartbreak and hurt,

but by the healing, hope, and

happiness that had followed. I know

this feeling is not for forever, I will still

come across some challenges but I am

glad I passed through bleakest

moments.

I've been happy since I started dating

Leroy Pedro; I really love his second

name. He loves s*x as much as I love it,

so he can keep up with me. I am glad

he doesn't complain even though he

told me that he doesn't want me to love

it as a weapon to fight my demons, so

he suggested the s*x Addicts group.

I started having sessions in that group.

It was heartbreaking to hear women

share their stories of how they ended

up being addicts. People were abused

sexually, physically, and emotionally. I

knew from there that my story isn't as

bad as their stories. I had a few

sessions, and Leroy was more glad to

see that I was no longer thinking of sex

when I am down, and I also enjoyed

sex more because I was no longer

doing it to make my emotions better.

With each passing day, I felt like I was

shedding the old skin, the one that had

been bruised and battered by the

storms of my past. I was emerging,

slowly but surely, into a stronger,

wiser, and more compassionate

version of myself. The scars still

lingered, but they no longer defined

me. Instead, they served as reminders

of the journey I'd been on, and the

strength I'd gained along the way. I

was no longer just a survivor; I was a

thriver, and I was ready to take on

whatever life had in store for me next.

It was end November already, my last

month at college. With my family's and

partner's support, I was able to focus

on my studies and pursue my

academic goals with renewed energy

and purpose. Their encouragement

and help meant the world to me, and I

was grateful for every late-night study

session and every word of advice so I

know I did well.

Chapter 6

As I looked to the future, I knew that I had the potential to achieve great things, and I was

excited to see where my academic

journey would take me.

I completely moved on from what

happened in my high school days. It

doesn't hurt anymore except that my

womb is having some issues, but I've

accepted that anything might happen

if I get pregnant or the possibility of

being infertile.

Leroy knows about my past;

he did not judge me, and I so wish he

commented on the womb issue so that

I can know if he would settle with a

girl who might not give him babies in

the future or not. I need talk to him

about this.

It's February; in few days I will be

turning 20 years. Last month I got my

results, and I did well, like I said that I

knew I did well. I asked Leroy about

having kids, and he just said we can

always adopt if we have challenges. I

just felt like he did not mean what he

said, but we will wait until we both

decide to try out for a baby. On my

birthday, he got me a gymnastics and dance studio with a recording studio

inside. I was happy that I even asked

him to lend me some cash so that I

could take him out. He laughed so loud

that I even fell for him again; hearing

his sexy laughter made me love him

more.

All these years when I was at home, I

would sleep out on Fridays or

Saturdays only for one night. I was still

a child at home who took orders from

my family, so even on those nights I

would beg them to let me go. When I

turned 20, they loosened up a bit, and

they were not that strict with my little

brother, who is 2 years younger than

me. I guess it was about being a girl

child and not wanting me to come

back home with pregnancy before 21

years. I had freedom when I was at

school because I was not around

guardians.

It has been 3 months without seeing

my periods. I heard that there are

other things that can make periods

late, like hormone imbalances. I hope

it's the case because I am not ready for

a pregnancy that might fail. Besides

that, I don't want a baby now, at least

when I am 22 or 23 maybe I would be

ready.

It has been 4 months, and I never took

a pregnancy test. I read about types of

false pregnancies like pseudocyesis

pregnancy. I did not really understand

its meaning, but it was about having

pregnancy symptoms despite not being

pregnant. I might be experiencing that.

Chapter 7

Few days back, I met Owen's friend,

Berry, at the mall. He looked good, I

even thought maybe he is working a

well paying job. He said he was coming

from an Interview on one of furniture

shops. Berry once mentioned that

furthering his studies is not an option

so I knew he was not studying. It was

really nice seeing him after years.

My studios are doing well; money is

coming in. I feel like introducing Leroy

to my mom, but I am scared; with my

mom, anything is possible. She might

give him a hard time for reasons only

known by her. I met Leroy's mother

and his half-sister, who seemed to be

hating me. I don't know or wish to

know her reasons; after all, I don't

need her approval or love to be with

his brother.

My soul felt lighter, freer from the

weight of past hurts. The memories

still lingered, but they no longer

defined me. The scars remained, but

they were no longer tender to the

touch. I had learned to cherish the

lessons of the past while embracing

the beauty of the present. With each

passing day, I felt myself becoming

more whole, more at peace. The pain

had given way to growth, and I was

grateful for the journey that had

brought me to this place of healing and

renewal.

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