Daydreams And Little Stories

Getting Lost

I was wide awake even when the clock struck one in the morning. It was almost an hour since I was simply tossing and turning around on the bed. The neatly done pile of homework sat on the desk beside me. My eyes drifted from the ceiling to the window, which was wide open. I could see the tiny glow moving in the driveway of my neighbors. Was he going out past the curfew?

Sitting up on the bed, I put my head outside the window to see the bike roar to life. It at least did have a silencer, otherwise I would not have been surprised if his aunt burst out of the door. His eyes drifted towards my room. How did he notice me? Then he seemed to take out his phone. The sudden buzzing of my phone made my heart leap.

It was him.

‘Mind joining me?’.

As much as I wanted to say I was afraid of breaking the curfew, my heart refused logic. I wanted to go. I wanted to experience what it was like to break the rules for once.

‘I will be in 2’. With that, I pulled on a hoodie and silently tried to walk down the stairs without letting the wood creak under my feet. Unlocking the back door quietly, I walked out.

He was waiting by my gate. No helmet.

“What about the helmet?”, I whisper shouted. “Aren’t we already breaking the rules?”, he asked, “For someone who never broke rules, this is what you need for thrill”. “Okay”, I muttered. “Hope on the bike already, we can't wait more”, he rolled his eyes.

“Sorry”.

Climbing on the motorcycle, we drove down the street. He was terribly fast. I clutched on to the back of the motorcycle trying not to fall. I seldom had motorcycle rides and none of the riders were this fast. Was he planning to outrun the speedometer? With the bump we came across, I knew I wouldn’t survive until we stopped. Rather, I wrapped my arms around his waist.

“Don’t be such a p***y Moe”, he chuckled. “I want to survive unlike you”, I replied. “That’s terrible!”, he replied, still chuckling.

“Where are we going?”, I asked. “I have no idea”, he replied, “Wherever this road takes us, no turning”. “Are you kidding me?”, I asked, narrowing my eyes. “It’s for real”, he replied, “You know, I’m quite glad this time there’s a flat chest sticking to my back”.

I rolled my eyes, “Are you trying to tell me my gender?”. “I don’t mind gender, honey”, he replied, nonchalantly.

I let my cheek press against his back, watching the silhouette of the trees alongside the road. It was no longer a residential area. Vast grasslands and thin layers of forest land was all that the land occupied. It was colder, and I was happy I grabbed my hoodie on the way.

“Will we be back by the sunrise?”, I asked. “Not sure”, he replied, “My aunt would kill me when she realizes I was out the whole night with another guy”. “She still doesn’t know?”, I asked. “She just thinks you are a feminine boy who I’m not supposed to talk to”, he replied. “Homophobic”, I sighed. “I’m just waiting for graduation. I’m getting out of this place”, he stated, confidently. “I am as well…”, I trailed off.

We will be on our separate ways later. Until now, it was subtle flirting, banter and verbally unconfirmed feelings. And in a few months we will not know each other anymore. Funny how people fall apart. It is either by misunderstanding or moving on, or time makes them grow apart. At the end of the long journey, it is probably us alone. Then why did others matter so much?

“What are you thinking about?”, he asked, like he read my mind. “Nothing actually”, I replied, “It’s full moon today”. “I don’t know if it was a weird fascination of mine, but I always felt connected to the moon”, he said. “Maybe you are a star-seed”, I randomly said. “You sound like a psychic now”, he laughed. “Sorry”, I chuckled.

“You should have broken more rules. Why are you so bound to them?”, he asked. “Upbringing matters”, I replied, “But honestly this is fun”. “Because it was me”, he was cheesy. “I can’t guarantee you that”, I said.

It was definitely because of him. I wouldn’t dare to step out after curfew for someone else. Call me a coward. But that was how I was. Inside the shell of my own. He always tried to break it, but I never let him. He was wild and fun while I was quiet and a loner. This time I let him break my shell, even if it was just a little. At that moment, I did not want to care about my parents finding an empty room in the morning. For once, I was not trapped; a free bird who discovered they like flying high with no obstructions. The misty clouds that invaded the sight were not an obstacle to stop me but for me to fly straight into them to unravel the mysteries that they held despite being snowy white and come out gaining knowledge and experience.

“Guess, we are lost”, he abruptly stopped the bike. But his voice was pure ecstasy. “Well… what are we to do now?”, I asked. “Walk around dumbass, the road ends here. We have to park the bike”, he playfully hit the back of my head, “You don’t mind being late, do you?”.

“No”.

He grinned, pulling out a cigarette. I watched him light it in the darkness with the small blaze providing ambiance to the space which was short lived. “Let’s get lost in here”, he said, grabbing my hand.

This is what I wanted. Getting lost somewhere without even caring about anything. If we were to grow apart after a few months, this is how I would like to rewind my memories in the future.