Say It Out Loud
464 Words
Ethan came home late.
I was still awake, sitting on the couch with the lights off, pretending I wasn’t waiting.
He paused when he saw me. “You should’ve gone to bed.”
“I know,” I said. “I just… couldn’t sleep.”
He dropped his jacket on the chair and sat across from me. There was a space between us now that hadn’t existed before. Not physical. Emotional.
“You’ve been different,” he said gently.
“So have you.”
He nodded. “I’m under a lot of pressure.”
“I know,” I replied. “So am I.”
Silence again.
But this time, I didn’t want to sit in it.
“I need to ask you something,” I said.
“Okay.”
“Are you fighting for me… or are you just trying not to lose me quietly?”
That question landed hard.
He looked down at his hands. “I don’t know how to fight the board without burning everything down.”
“I’m not asking you to burn your life down,” I said softly. “I’m asking you if I’m worth the fire.”
He looked up.
I had never seen him look so torn.
“This world isn’t kind,” he said. “It chews people up. I don’t want it to chew you up too.”
I smiled sadly. “You think it hasn’t already started?”
He reached for me this time, and I didn’t pull away. His hand was warm. Familiar.
“I love you,” he said quietly.
The words were simple.
But they felt like a bomb.
I didn’t cry. I didn’t smile. I just breathed.
“Then say it with your actions,” I replied. “Not just your feelings.”
He swallowed. “I don’t want to lose you.”
“I don’t want to be hidden.”
Silence.
The real kind.
The kind that decides things.
“I can’t live half a life,” I continued. “I can’t be real with you in private and invisible in public. That’s not love to me. That’s survival.”
He closed his eyes briefly. “So what are you saying?”
I took a deep breath.
“I’m saying… either we stop pretending completely, or we stop this completely.”
His eyes snapped open. “You’re asking me to choose.”
“No,” I said gently. “I’m asking you to be honest.”
We stared at each other.
Two people who started with a contract.
Two people who accidentally fell in love.
And now had to decide if love was strong enough to exist in the real world.
Because feelings were easy.
But choosing each other?
That was the part that scared us both.
- Writer
