CHOOSING TO BE NUMBER 2

drugs

how did i let myself get this bad from doing drugs selling my body having mutiple s*x partner's let my body lost all my weight hurting myself others having threesome's orgies going from party to party how DID me a WOMAN a BLACK WOMAN let myself get this far let men just do whatever tear me down allow them to just take my spirit my soul and destroy it I never thought i will see myself going down hill the way i did i never wanted my life to end this way to be known in the streets as junky a w***e degrading my body to everyone in the world living a lie and not being a good mother will i ever be at peace can i just stop being a STUPID b***h. IS I'M SUPPOSE TO BE NUMBER 2 FOR LIFE OR AM I JUST SCARED ? HA IM JUST STUPID  or is it that i dont wanna stop f*****g hi cause i know what he can do to my body or is that im really in love with a MAN THAT DONT BELONG TO ME. WHO KNOWS I WILL NEVER KNOW THE f*****g ANSWERS TO s**t