My Head's Above Water

Fourteen

You scare me, you know?

I never dreamed that you would resurface

With your dull green eyes filled with hate and fear, flinching at the sight of yourself

With your harsh words that s***h my skin to bloody ribbons, bringing me back to square one

You were the unexpected flood dragging my head underwater, daring me to fight you or take a breath

With your pouting bottom lip and teary eyes at the slightest hint of a storm

You with your snarling, mercilessly howling, shaking my ear

The way you shook my house, cracking the foundation scared me, my feet unsteady undee me

You stole the air from my lungs as I finally caught my breath

You bent my arm too far behind my back until I finally screamed, "Mercy!"

You scared me, you shattered the mirror, shattering my very existence

Your wars scared every inch of my skin, painting little white lines with thin metal

You stabbed me in my back and then forced me to bandage it, willing me to defy you, to show anyone the damage you have done

You slammed the heavy wrought iron gate, locking me away from the world and throwing away the key

We're not so different, you and I.

I'll tell you a secret...

I'm not as clueless as I seem

I expected you, we are linked, you and I, a raging flood couldn't keep us apart

I waited for you, with shaking hands and aching bones

I welcomed you with a warm smile and loving embrace

I held you in my arms and promised you are worthy

I took your hands and danced with you through the flickering flames

Now, I'm not afraid to say it,

You are me a part of me, no matter how far I try to run