I Won't Cry For This Family

Intimate In Miami

A surge of energy burst through me, and for the first time in a long while I felt free.

I carefully took a photo of the details of the banquet, then I returned the package back to where I saw it. I decided not to pack for Gilbert at that time anymore because I didn't want him to know that I had seen the memo, so I left it.

What would have been a very depressing evening for me turned out to be one that made me look forward to something.

Something, anything.

I had nothing to look forward to before, good or bad. My life had been centered around Gilbert and my family. I woke up, and lived every minute of the day for them, especially Gilbert, but now that I had something to look forward to, something real and driving, I felt different.

I felt a spark. Like the flicker of a lighter eventually coming to life. I came alive.

I was sleeping peacefully and dreaming about a bright future when I suddenly heard my name, ‘’Christy! Christy!!’’

I perceived Gilbert’s perfume before I saw his upset face staring at me.

They had returned from the game while I slept.

‘’Yes? Gil!’’ I sat up and rubbed my eyes, trying to make sense of what was going on around me.

Immediately, I felt heavy panic as I remembered the package addressed to me that was in Gilbert’s drawer.

Was that a dream?

I hoped not.

‘’Why didn’t you pack for me?’’ Gilbert shook me by my shoulder and interrupted my thoughts.

‘’What?’’ I asked. I was still trying to wake up properly.

‘’You packed for everyone apart from me, why?’’

When Gilbert asked me that question, I was relieved. That meant it was not a dream. I had seen the package and decided not to pack for Gilbert yet.

‘’I wanted you to choose what to wear.’’ I sprang up to my feet as Gilbert was demanding.

‘’What do you mean? You always pack for me. Pack now! I must travel ahead of everyone.’’ The expression on Gilbert's face was valid because indeed, I always packed for Gilbert when he went on trips, and I didn't need him to select anything.

I knew exactly what he would wear wherever he was going.

However, with all the trauma and stress that Gilbert and my family had put me through, it was understandable if I acted differently. So Gilbert believed that my brain had skipped and I didn't know what to pack for him.

‘’Okay.’’ I started to sort out Gilbert’s things, deliberately ignoring the drawer. I struggled not to make the moment awkward. If Gilbert knew that I was deliberately ignoring that drawer, he might figure out that I had seen my invitation to the Science Adaptation Program.

I concentrated on everything else apart from that drawer until Gilbert remembered it. He got up suddenly, strode to the drawer and took out the package carefully.

Glancing at me, Gilbert acted naturally as if he was not trying to hide such an important information from me. He acted as if he was not hiding my life from me as he had done for twenty years.

I acted oblivious of everything and did my task, and by the time I finished, Gilbert was asleep.

He had just fallen asleep because his phone was still unlocked. A message bubble appeared on Gilbert's phone, with so many love-struck emojis around it. I saw a new message from Alice saying, ‘’I can’t wait for tomorrow.’’

When I opened the message, I saw that there was a ticket for Gilbert and Alice for an intimate night in Miami. Then two days later, they will meet Graham and Joseph at the airport to start their trip to Los Angeles for the Mayfair.

I looked at the ticket as well as other intimate messages between Gilbert and Alice, and my heart was torn to pieces, but I was quick to recover.

The following morning, I was up as usual. Earlier than the birds. I started to get Gilbert ready. I started to run his hot water, then I put some oats on fire.

The ticket I saw last night said that the time of their flight was 9:00 AM. Gilbert needed an early start.

He knew I would handle everything, so he did not wake up until seven thirty.

He took a bath, ate, and left for the airport without looking at me or saying any parting words to me as his wife.

When Gilbert left, I got the house cleaned up, prepared breakfast for Graham and Joseph, and then I went back to my room.

I had some free time because Gilbert was not around.

This did not happen often.

I took out my phone, searched for the Science Adaptation Council on the internet, and started to research for my forthcoming speech.

An hour later, I heard Lucy enter the house.

Lucy was my daughter-in-law.

The Mayfair trip to Los Angeles had made her return impromptu from school.

She was studying for her master's degree, and I was the person who helped my son, Graham to pay for it.

After paying for Lucy’s master’s degree, Graham, just like others, disregarded my existence.

‘’Mum!’’

Lucy screamed at me.

‘’I’m hungry. Didn’t Gray tell you I was coming?’’ she murmured.

I heard Graham reply, ‘’I forgot. Sorry.’’ ‘’Mum, please make some breakfast for Lu...’’

Joseph who had been quiet the whole morning, ran into the living room. Causing a tantrum, he hugged his mother.

‘’Grandma Alice has brought my mom back home too. Grandma Alice is always the best.’’

Lucy’s smile was as broad as the city bridge.

‘’I can’t miss that trip for the world,’’ saying this, Lucy hugged Joseph back

‘’Mom, hurry, I’m starving. I travelled all night.’’

Lucy switched to a serious expression as she barked orders at me. But I ignored her and did what I always did.

I bent down and worked for my family until my fingers ached.