Forelsket

My world!

After running away from them, I meet my friends. they right just behind the corner. they notice how breathy am looking. they asked me what happen, but I don't know how are they gonna react or think?, what if they think am exaggerating?

"I meet Elrond in the washroom..." I said that and, they didn't react like it doesn't matter. they show me the concern for me.

"Did he say anything to you?" Petra said in a very worrying way as a true friend does. the same expression was on Elsa's face too. maybe am thinking too much. maybe am was not thinking of them as friends in the first place? maybe am not open to them. 

"no he didn't say anything to me ..he was smoking a cigarette there..." 

"what? in school? is he serious?" Elsa said in shock.

"seriously..being a child of higher portion comes with benefits..." Elsa added on. with clearly feeling unfair of the system! 

"We should be going, tomorrow is our first test of the semester.." Petra said and start to drag me and Elsa towards exits.

"It's an MCQ (multiple choice question) so chill..." Elsa tries to take some invisible stress off Petra's shoulder.

"Still, test is test!" Petra said and we laugh and talk about today's class and all the things that happened at lunchtime.. seriously. we have regrets and anger within us. regrets about, how we should not climb on the table at all. anger on Elrond, his bullying, and no one can do anything. In this conversion, I get to know them better, like how they approach situations. for Petra, she knows what is wrong what is right. she will definitely take that side, which, if she believes It's right. and Elsa is easy going and definitely look at an alternative approach for the situation. like she would view see like the third person point of view. 

and me? am still unknown to my own thinking. will I able to open to them..my personality... It's not like am pretending to them, am not. it's just there something like... I need time..to open to them...even I wanted to open to them. I can't. and I know it. all I need is time. It's not like they are open to each other, or should I say, we are open to each other. we getting to know each other. and that's fine. the tree doesn't grow in one day.

then reach a point where we have a different direction. we said goodbye to each other and went in our way.

****

I went home and see my home from distance...It's very noticeable, cause It's pink. My mom was fade up by all neighbor's wall paint was light yellow. which we also had once, but mom decided "we are different."  

that how we paint it pink. light pink...which looks nice to at least... as I enter I see brother car here too. he usually comes home past 6. but dad was not home. he probably in the office of course.

I speed up my phase to see my brother. Jackson. he is the most lovely and best brother in the world. he knows me the best, besides mom and dad. he understands me. like when I wanted a painting set, which has everything pencil, water paint, crayon, and all that stuff, and everyone has those and I wanted those too. But I was unable to ask this to dad because that time lost his job. and I don't want him to feel like he's unable to provide me something.  

and one day of returning from the elementary school my brother saw me crying. he got so worried and asked me what happened. I tell him everything that. one of my classmates didn't let me see the painting set and called me poor. 

he didn't say anything like, "I'll go and talk to her"  or "I'll do something".  

but he said "some people don't know they are hurting other people's feelings. but It's okay. don't feel sad. but something like this happens again. tell me okay...your brother will do it." but the next day that girl say sorry to me. a teacher saw what happen yesterday. when I return home. he gifted me that painting set. 

he told me that, he was planning to give this on my birthday, but he thought, this might be the best time. I know my brother use to do part-time jobs, without telling our parents, and when he gifted me that I feel sad that maybe because of the financial condition of the house? or my brother might be saving that money for something else? but he gave it to me. I feel so great. but now, my father has a very good job and Jackson also got a job last month.

"Jacky!!" I shout and run to him and hug him. It's almost been three days that I last saw him.

"Hey Lu," he said and hug me back. "how was the school? make any friends?" 

"yes.." I said and we broke the hug.

"good to know.." he said and rub my head.

"are you on the break?" I asked as we take a seat on the sofa. "..no.." he said and I know he wasn't lying.

"uuunnnhhh...why??" I said in a very whiny voice to convince him whatever his plan is.

"am sorry Lu. Jacky going on a business trip.." he said and rub my shoulder.

"I hate your work.." I said and he laughs at it.

"where's mom?" I asked looking around.

"packing some clothes of mine.."

"When you're going and where are you going?" I didn't expect him to leave today.

"..around 6:30....and am going to new work.." he said but then his phone ring...

"one sec..." he said and went to the backyard.

***

I changed and fresh up and went to see mom so I can help her with anything.

"mom..need any help..." I stop what I was saying looking at the two big bags she was packing...

"mom? how long his going for..?" 

"for two months..." 

what??

"what? for whole two months...like seriously..am telling him to start searching for another job." am angry, he just joined where he works,

"Lu, It's an opportunity for him to understand the work better.." mom said as she packed a suit and zip the bag."

"what's the time?" she asked and I said "5:00 pm" 

"We still got time...why don't we have some snacks with him.." 

yes...I love my mom.

then we had snacks together, Jacky like my egg sandwich. he really boosts up my confidence. The same goes for mom and dad, they also like my egg sandwich. I sometimes pack it for my dad to eat at lunchtime..he always says others got jealous of him..hehe.

then dad came, if being honest, he's an old school type, like a man should work take care of family an all. but he never forces my mom do to housework like... he raised by his grandparents.. so..yeah..but he's still best..he tries to understand..all three of us..and the generation we live on...but that's okay...we know he always thinks best for us...

Then It's almost time for Jacky to leave. dad going to drop him.

"see you, Jacky...take care of yourself. try not to skip food and get plenty of sleep..."

"yes. mom don't worry take care of yourself and look at both of them..." 

hey!!

then he turns to me...

"two months going pass before you know it." I just nodded my head. am sad. this is the first time he going for a long period of time...

"try to facetime us,.." I said..and he nodded his head.

and then he leaves.. me and mom bye to him...

"I hope he does well there.." I said and we start to go inside.

"Lu, remember, you have to break your shell to grow...and someday you have to break yours.."

she said and pat my back... and we went inside...

I hope, I would able to break it...