Kissing the Fae

Chapter 46

We waited. But it has been three days since we found the man and still, he is in deep slumber. He’s alive, of course. He is still breathing and he looked so calm now. Gone the tiredness in his face, gone those fear... And I figured he is handsome, yes.

He has a soft feature. The kind of guy the Sisters would like. Unlike the three jerks who looked intimidating wearing their hard expression, this human seem soft and gentle. I noticed his long eye lashes and the flaws on his skin. Those freckles scattered on his nose, and the nose... It’s perfect, yes. I admit that I got hooked with his looks. It is unique and so unlikely.

Like he was made perfectly with no flaws. Like this man never suffered a day feeling ugly because he know he is not born to feel insecurity about his physical self.

“It has been three days,” I whispered. “Can he just sleep and never wake up? I think that’s the best way for him to die.”

“Stop with that words,” said Terran. “He is lucky he survived. Sadly, the other one didn’t...”

The one who landed on Alistair’s place didn’t make it. On the second day of her stay, she died.

I don’t know what to feel. I didn’t even know the whole story. Alistair didn’t show up when Deniz and Terran visited me in the Enchanted Forest. I won’t deny that I felt worried. Not just for Alistair’s feeling but also, for the man laying on my bed for three days now. When is he going to wake up? Or is he even going to?

Even the strong aura surrounding him was gone. I can’t feel it anymore... As time passes, it just gets slower and weaker and it made me think that maybe, he will soon follow the other human who died two days ago.

I just can’t... I don’t even know what to do anymore. Once we wake up, then what? If he won’t, then I’d just feel guilty like usual but that’s something I got myself to get used to.

“She was too young and weak, princess. Alistair tried to do his best to save the little girl but eventually, she didn’t make it. She died while Alistair was trying to save her. Now, we can’t find him... He’ probably hiding somewhere, killing himself with guiltiness and loneliness, blaming himself for what happened to that little girl...”

“That’s their reality,” I told him, looking away. “To die is their reality... even the man behind that door,” I pointed out the door to my bedroom. “He will eventually die. Maybe later or tomorrow, who knows?”

“He even almost died because of what you guys did to her bedroom,” said Zah.

I nodded. They looked at me, confused. Probably didn’t remember what they did to my room. Casting a spell and it’s annoying. Always.

“My bedroom is not your playground,” I told them seriously. “So, stop messing with my room, casting spell because it’s getting in my nerves, okay?”

Terran chuckled. As if not taking seriously of it. I rolled my eyes at him. Of course, he won’t... It became their hobby to mess with me through messing my room and as I have expected, they like what they are seeing.

To see me annoyed just gave them the satisfaction.

“It’s kinda fun to see you pissed off about something you are used to,” he said, chuckling.

Again, I rolled my eyes. “You are not actually here to talk about it. You guys are here because of that human still laying on my bed with small chance to live.”

“He will live, Rani Letisha...” Deniz said firmly. “He’s still breathing, right? And he seem strong just by the aura surrounding him. You don’t have to worry about anything and if ever he died while in his sleep, it’s not your fault. As you have said, to die is their reality.”

I went silent, then sighed deeply. I leaned on the chair and looked at them. They looked like nothing worry them anymore. Unlike me who just always worry at small things, who pretend I fear nothing but the truth is, I do fear something... A lot of things could happen and it’s scary because no one can really tell.

Right... There are some but they won’t disclose the future they seen.

“Aren’t you guys interested to see what the other world looks like?” I asked them when moment of silence passed.

Not everyone knows that there is the other world. To those who know, I am certain they are curious and has the urges to escape and see what the human world has to offer. We all want a escape, right? To see and experience new things is what everyone desires.

“Honestly, I tried to...” said Deniz. “I tried to go there before, Rani Letisha. Because I felt sick being a leader and shouldering all those expectations they have for us. I can’t take the pressure. But it kills me thinking of leaving those people.”

I think we all felt that. Well, that’s how I felt before.

“I planned of going there and never come back,” it was Terran. “You know I don’t want to lead. I never wanted to become a leader because I fear of disappointing anyone in my group. But all of us was left with no choice but rule. No one will handle the people in Sidhe if I leave...”

We actually have a choice. To leave or to stay. But we all chose to stay and lead because of our emotions. We don’t want to live life feeling guilty for turning our back, we don’t want to see them suffer in the hands of other greedy people... We don’t want that.

So we all chose to stay because we felt like it was the right thing to do. It was right... We thought we can get used to it until we no longer feel that we were forced to do it. Until we accepted our fate.

But I guess, there is still a little bit of urges left inside our hearts. The urge to just be freed from all these things, from all the heavy duties and just live simply. That after all these years, our little dreams to be an ordinary adults are still deep inside us, sleeping...

“Well, I guess we all wish to live a simple life. But for us, it’s too impossible so might as well accept our fate, right? It’s the best thing we can do, to be tied forever with our unwanted obligations,” said Terran and he was right.

Another day has passed but still, the human was still sleeping. I can see some improvement, though. Just by basing on his looks, I think he has regained his strength. I noticed a lot of changes, it was as if he became more strong than the last time I saw him. I mean, I can’t really tell... He was weak and helpless when we found him, now that he has rested, maybe this is really what he looks like if well-rested, right?

But I can’t really explain the uneasiness building inside me. I know it’s not just because he hasn’t woke up yet, but something deeper but I can’t pinpoint it out. Even me was confused and I chose to just kept it to myself.

And because of my worry, I told the La Reina about him. She doesn’t looked so bothered and I guess, I am just overreacting and contradicting my words.

If he’d die in his sleep, then again... to die is his reality.

“The boys told me how much you were bothered by that human,” the La Reina when I visited her. “But you don’t really have to, Rani Letisha. Don’t worry too much, okay? Just don’t...”

“I just can’t help it, La Reina,” I told her honestly. “This is my first time having a human in my own space and I fear seeing him just die like that. In my own bed, in the Enchanted Forest, that’s what I am worried about.”

“The boys told me the human looked so strong,” she uttered, eyes looking at me sharply. “And yes, I understand where you are coming from, Rani Letisha. But you must accept it because that’s how it is going to work. The other human, she was destined to die and the one under your roof, that’s his destiny, too.”

She held my hand and I sighed. “I’m just worried and scared, mum. That’s all...”

“It is normal to feel that way, of course... It is normal and valid, Rani... But don’t put too much pressure on yourself, okay? The people are expecting a lot from you and that’s enough pressure. Do not add up to it...”

Shaking my head, I look at her tiredly. I haven’t really tell my parents about how I feel towards my position and title. I don’t like it... I don’t like people to expect anything from me because I might fail them, I might disappoint them.

“I don’t really like to lead,” I told her.

That’s the only thing they both know. That I hate ruling. And maybe, they were convinced that after all these years, I finally love the idea of it. But not my father who seems so skeptical about it.

“You and the La Roi, I knew you have an idea about that. That I am not happy... But it’s not just that, mum. I feel so tired from everyone’s expectation, I wanted to take a break and be away if not for a short time, then forever away from home...”

“Rani Letisha...” she squeezed my hands so gentle.

“I have had this little dream of mine since I was a kid, before I was exposed to this kind of life, before I discovered the life and the responsibilities waiting for me... I wanted to live life in a simple manner, mum. Away from the expectations, away from those obligations and rules.”

I felt my heart sank thinking of my childhood. I thanked them for giving me time to experience what childhood life was. But it was too short I felt like I’ve missed a lot of things.

“Rani...” she called again, now softly. “I understand... But this is the life you are supposed to live with forever. This is the life that you were born to have. To lead, to rule... You were destined to rule, Rani Letisha. Even us, your parents, can’t do anything to change that.”

“I had a choice,” I whispered. “To leave the Acres Kingdom... To escape but I didn’t because I’d feel guilty for running away, for neglecting the needs of my people. Even though it makes me so sad and suffered because ruling means I gave up my freedom to be happy...”

“I am so sorry,” she said. “I know how hard it is for you to lead. To handle those heavy duties you don’t like, to rule not just the Faye region but in the future, the whole Acres Kingdom, too. But I can’t do anything about it... I can’t change your destiny.”

I shook my head and smiled a bit. “I am not asking you to change even a bit of it, mum. Because I know someday, it will. The lies — if there is — will do the job for you, mum. For everything will change once it’s proven.”

She gasped, surprised. “Rani, nothing will change. There is no lies and you must believe no one but me.”

I smiled again. I know she can tell I’m not convince. Then, let’s just wait for that day to come, eh. Because everything will soon be discovered. No secrets will be kept hidden forever.

“Mum... If ever it’s true that I am not a true blooded Fae, then let us all be ready with change because we both know it can’t be stopped. The lies itself will be the reason of my changes and I hope you won’t blame anyone, even yourself for keeping it from me.”