18
1406 Words
“Thanks for the ride.” I told Leo when he dropped me off at Rachel's place.
“Always at your service.” He winked, then the car drove off.
I watched it go, before heading over to ring the doorbell.
Imogen was the one to open the door, Rick beside her.
“Mummy!” She threw me in a hug, and I lifted her.
“Hey baby, how are you?” I asked, walking in after ruffling my nephew's hair, then closed the door behind me.
“Great! I played family with Rick.”
“What?”
“She and Rick were husband and wife apparently.” Rachel explained from where she was eating in the parlor. “Their kids were dolls or something.”
“Sounds like you had fun.”
“Yes, we did.” Rick answered, hopping beside me as I went to the parlor.
I set Imogen down, so the two ran off up the stairs.
“How about Leo?” Rachel asked through a mouthful of chips.
“He left after dropping me off.”
“Really? He didn't even stop by to say hi or anything.” She snorted. “Asshole.”
I chortled lowly, then relaxed beside her, stealing a handful of chips from her bowl.
“So, how was the meeting?”
“I think I'll leave that part for Leo to explain.” I started to eat the chips.
“Oh yeah, he'll definitely know how to explain it better.”
“You two and your gossips.” I smiled either way, stealing from her chips again.
“What's a group of three friends, if two of them don't gossip about the third.” She winked, and we both laughed.
Rachel bit her lower lip after.
It made me raise a brow. “Is there something you want to talk about?”
“What makes you ask?”
I shrugged, taking another mouthful. “For one, you've not shot me yet for eating your chips.”
“Oh yeah, stop that.” She chuckled, slapping my hand away when I wanted to take more.
“Alright, what's wrong?”
A sigh left her lips. “I should ask you that.”
“What do you mean?”
Her lips pursed, before she continued, “You and Leo… Where do you two stand? In your relationship, I mean.”
Oh.
Rachel rarely ever asked about my relationships, so this was definitely bound to be awkward.
“Why?”
“You know why?” She turned with furrowed brows. “You've been together for three years already, Lisa. You know Leo is a man, he will want more.”
“Are you talking about s*x? Because I'll have you know that I've given him that on several occasions.”
She rolled her eyes. “No, not s*x,” then muttered, “although I'm sure you've had the same amount of s*x during three years, that Richard and I would have in a month.”
My lips pressed in a thin line, but I didn't argue. I had no idea how many times she and her boyfriend had s*x, but mine with Leo was exactly ten times (none this year, by the way).
“Alright, what are you driving at?” I asked.
She stared like she wasn't sure if to continue, then took in a deep breath. “Do you love him?”
A pucker formed between my brows. “Love?”
“Yeah, I mean, it's obvious that Leo loves you, but when I look at you, I wonder if you feel the same way.
“He makes you laugh,” she continued, “is always there for you, and he adores Imogen, so you have no reason to not feel something deeper.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but wasn't sure what the right words were.
One thing I knew was that ‘love' was too strong a word to describe what I felt for Leo.
“Our relationship is still growing, and we're going at the pace it takes us.”
“What if it doesn't take you any further than where you are? What happens then?”
I frowned. “Why are you questioning me this much? Why do you even care?”
“Because Leo is a great guy.” She said, face fallen. “And I know he would want to go deeper into this relationship. He really loves you, he's just holding back because you've never given him a reason not to.”
The way she said it made me feel like a bad person. “Did he tell you that?”
“No, but I see it.” Her voice was soft. “I see how much he hates the boundaries you've created.
“Listen, I don't want his heart broken,” she leaned back, “if you're not going to give him what he wants, then I think you should let him know. Don't give him false hopes.”
My frown deepened. “I'm not breaking up with him.”
Leo had a special part in my life, I just couldn't see myself losing him.
“Then love him.”
I sucked in a breath. “I've tried, Rachel.” Believe me, I had. During these years, I'd tried to make my heart flutter at his flirts or race when he's near, “It's just not that easy.”
She sighed. “Are you sure it's not because you're still hung up on him?”
“Who?”
“Drex…”
••
“...and Rick took our daughter, Cinderella, to the park.” Imogen kept on saying as I helped her into her nightgown.
“Oh?” I tried to pretend like I wasn't distracted, just as I'd been doing since we left Rachel's house and she started talking.
The conversation with Rachel had been bothering me since.
I had argued about the Drex part because I knew it wasn't true, but the Leo aspect disturbed me.
Rachel wasn't the type to pester on my personal life, and the fact she did so today was prove that this was something deep in her heart.
Something she knew Leo would want me to know.
“...he played rollercoaster with the children.” I was so lost in thought that I almost forgot Imogen was still talking.
“That's nice.” I feigned a smile, then took her to her bed. “I think you've had a pretty good day, but it's time to shut down for the day.”
She nodded, then laid on it so I lifted the duvet over her shoulders, and sat beside her.
“Mummy, can I ask a question?”
“Of course, dear.”
I might have agreed, but her next words was definitely not something I expected.
“Do I have a daddy?” She asked, and I froze.
“What? Why do you ask?”
She had never asked about her father. I knew the day would come where she would, but I just didn't expect it to be so soon.
“Rick says that tomorrow's father's day.” She replied, completely oblivious of how my chest was tightened. “He says his daddy would have taken him out if he was around.
“Do I have a daddy who can take me out tomorrow?”
I wasn't even sure how to reply.
Don't get it wrong, I was going to tell her about Drex some day.
But not now.
It was just too soon.
“Uncle Leo can take you out tomorrow.” I only remembered after that it won't be possible. Leo would be in his company.
“Is Uncle Leo my daddy?”
“Uh, what? No.” I shook my head. “No, he's not.”
When her face fell, I quickly added, “Alright, let's do it this way, I'll take you out tomorrow to wherever you want to go and we'll celebrate together.”
Her face lit. “Can we go to the zoo?!”
“Uhm… yeah, sure.”
“Yay! I get to see a lion!”
I was definitely not taking her to where lions were, but her excitement made me smile.
Deep down though, her question lingered.
“Good night, dear.” I kissed her forehead, before leaving the room after turning off the light.
This was one long day.
- Writer
