Becoming a moth

Day 4

Day 4

Awaking the next day, I got out of the hollow. My hand no longer hurting. Looking at it, there were no more bruises. It felt fine. My stomach was in knots at this point, still with no food. I went to the edge again, still unsure of if I could, should, pass through. The poignant smell was still there but lighter than the day before. I walked along the edge, hoping that there would be a passage out. I needed to find food. I needed water. But I had no luck. I tried to push through it again to get to the stream and the smell hit me hard again, landing me on my ass once more.

I lay on the grass looking up at the sky, trying to figure out a way out of this clearing. Nothing comes to me.

When the sun came to be high in the sky, the sweet smell was there. Calling to me. I got up to follow it, not knowing where it would take me. I go to the edge of the clearing looking for it. When I find it, it starts to bring me into the forest. Leading me down to the stream I was so desperate to get to before. I put my whole head into the stream and drink all that I can. When I’m done, I see an animal that looks a lot like a rabbit. My hunger takes over me. I started to stalk the rabbit-like creature hoping that I would be able to have something to eat. The strong harsh smell then hits me hard and the rabbit looks up at me and hops off into the woods. Mad at myself for allowing a smell to keep me from eating, I stomp off.

The sweet smell comes back and I follow it. The sweet smell then brings me further into the woods where I see deer eating some small trees. I knew then that it would be my dinner. I pick up some rocks in the hope that it will help me take down this creature. Knowing that I only have a rock, I move my way around to the back of it as quietly as I can. Getting around to the back of it, I climb a tree very careful not to make a noise. I then jump on to it and hold on to one of it’s antlers as it starts to freak out. I then took the rock and hit it on its head as hard as I could. I repeat this over and over till the animal stops moving. With adrenal and hunger running, though I barely give a thought to how brutal I am being to the creature. Eventually, it stops moving. Unsure if it’s really dead or not, I hit its head a few more times till its skull was completely bashed in.

I stop and think for a minute, knowing that I need to get the guts out. I didn't know how. I’ve never had to catch my own food before. I looked down at my stomach and dragged the rock along it, leaving a bloody mark on my clothes as I thought about how to de-gut an animal. I started to look around for a sharper stone. It takes a few minutes and a lot of tossing stones aside till I find one that will work. Rushing back to the deer, I started to get to work, being careful not to mess up. The stone cuts into the animals' flesh, leaking blood all over my hands. I work on the deer, thinking hard about how to make this work. When I pull open the deer, I see the guts. I stuck my hand in and started to pull them out, trying to be careful not to rip anything that might spoil the meat. The job I did was definitely not a neat one. Something definitely did rip that shouldn't of, but I needed to eat, so I kept at my work till all the guts laid on the ground. Then I started to drag the deer back to the stream. I found it by listening for the sound of the moving water . I then climbed into the water and rinsed off the blood that was on me.

The sweet smell then calls to me, dragging me back to that clearing. I refuse to leave my catch, so I drag it with me, knowing that I must go back. I was completely exhausted from my day falling down when I entered the clearing with the deer on top of me. The sweet smell was still in the air as I looked up to see the sun was falling. Mustering what strength I could, I pushed the deer off me and got up. I pull as hard as I can trying to bring it back over to where I know I will be spending the night hopping that nothing comes looking for the meat. Once the carcass is near the tree, I think hard about how hunters prepare the meat. While thinking, it occurred to me that they hang it up. Crap, how am I to do that? I have no rope and my body is so tired from the day and the lack of food. I started looking around, trying to figure out, not knowing if this was a necessary part or not of harvesting meat. I was about to give up when I looked down and noticed my shoes. I don’t know if my shoe laces will hold up my meat but I have to try. My hands trumble from exposition as I undo the shoe laces.

The lilac smell starts to enter my noise I try to fight off the erge to just sleep knowing that I still have work that needs to be done. The slight lilac smell mixed with the sweetness isn’t so strong that I can’t keep working. It does help me to calm my nerves as a feeling of protection radates through me. My hands not shaking as much, I managed to tie some knots to the antlers. I then go through the other side of each string over a branch in the tree that I will be sleeping in. As I pull down, a slight sour smell hits me and I almost fell down when it first hit me. The smell lessens but stays there as I pull down till I stop. Tying it of on another part of the tree, another snap of the smell hits me. It stings as I inhale.

The smell is quickly replaced with the lilac smell seeming to come from everywhere. After a few minutes, the smell died down just a little and the sweet smell emanated from the tree I was going to sleep in. I looked at it with a puzzled look on my face. There were no flowers on it at all. When I climbed into the hollow, I smelled a faint smell of the sour from before. I pet the tree, unsure of what else to do. Felling like somehow it was my fault, the sour smell was there. The smell starts to subside and I curl up to sleep.