Date: 1998-05-30
"People say being pregnant is the most wonderful experience they ever had, but for me, it is being a curse. I never got husband's love but I thought being a mother I will shower every bit to my baby. Ever since I have known I was pregnant I am not myself. I am having nightmares of someone tearing my skin from my body, I am having a nightmare of being hunted down. From home to hospital I see blood everywhere"
I quickly pulled other paper
Date: 1998-10-11
'I am six months pregnant, and more miserable. I don't think I can make it to 9 months. Yesterday I gobbled my goldfish in the aquarium. A servant saw that and is afraid to confront me ever since. Am I turning into a devil I crave for blood? What am I? This baby is turning me into the devil. I still have the same dream
