A Hand to Hold

Chapter twenty-nine

~ Ronan

*

“Ten million dollars?!” Natalie repeated in astonishment.

“Desmond, explain,” I said from my seat on the coffee table.

“That’s the root of the Russians’ grudge toward the Novikov family. Andrei and Eva stole ten mil. And rumor has it, the only way to reclaim the money is through your new bride.” Natalie’s face drained of color as she meekly responded, “Me?”

*

I rose to comfort my wife, but she brushed me away. Evidently, she was still displeased with me for overstepping my bounds in having Desmond dig into her parents’ past without her consent. I regretted keeping her in the dark, but I stood by the belief that investigating her family was entirely necessary.

*

“But… that’s not true,” Natalie insisted. “I don’t have that kind of money. I never did. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have needed to work all through college.” I wasn’t aware she’d worked through college. I knew she’d finished a four-year degree in three, but I didn’t realize she’d held down a job on top of that. There was little wonder I’d been so drawn to her; she was incredible.

*

“What about your aunt?” I suggested. “You were so young when your parents died. Perhaps your aunt knows what happened to the money.” Natalie shrugged and replied, “If she does, she never gave any indication. Where do you think I get my work ethic from? Melody has worked two jobs my entire life.”

*

That was the first time I’d heard Natalie refer to her aunt by name, and I found it odd. “You said your dad was Russian and your mother American. So, your aunt’s your mother’s sister… right?”

“No,” Natalie answered. “Melody’s not my aunt by blood at all, actually. She’s my godmother.”

“That’s probably why the Russians couldn’t find you as a child,” Desmond pointed out. “Because you weren’t adopted by a blood relative.”

*

“Natalie,” I said. “First thing in the morning, you need to call Melody.” With a sigh, she replied, “If I do, she’ll ask all sorts of questions. Questions I can’t answer without coming clean about why you and I got married.”

“It’s time she knew the truth.”

“Once she knows, she’s going to drop everything to come here.”

“Why?”

“I’m practically her daughter, Ronan,” Natalie explained. “She’s always been very protective of me, especially because of what happened to my parents. I didn’t grow up speaking Russian. Melody’s a language teacher. She taught me, hoping it would help keep me safe.”

*

I considered everything Natalie told me and said, “If Melody wants to come, use the credit card I gave you to buy her a plane ticket. She’s successfully kept you safe all these years. She deserves to be kept in the loop. And, with any luck, she’ll be able to shed more light on this money situation.” I would’ve said anything to put Natalie’s mind at ease and conclude our conversation for the night. She looked exhausted. However, before I could broach the topic of her returning to bed, her phone buzzed from her robe pocket. Who the hell was texting her at 3am?

*

When Natalie withdrew her phone and checked the notification, any color left in her complexion vanished. I nearly didn’t catch her in time as her knees gave out. “Natalie!” I exclaimed, supporting the majority of her weight. She hadn’t passed out, but her body fell limp from shock. “What happened?” Callum asked.

“I don’t know,” I answered, guiding my wife to the armchair.

*

Kneeling beside Natalie, I looked up at her expressionless face. “Nat, what is it? What’s wrong?” A few hairs had escaped the confines of her braid, and I brushed them away from her face as I pleaded, “Baby, talk to me.” Her hands trembled as she passed me the phone.

*

Upon examining my wife’s phone, I found a news article featuring a diner fire from barely a week prior. The diner had burned entirely to the ground, claiming the lives of two people. “I don’t understand,” I said, passing the phone to Callum.

*

When I looked back at Natalie, tears were streaming down her face. These tears differed vastly from what I’d witnessed when she saw her painting hanging in my office. These were tears of sorrow. And the sight tore me up more than I wanted to admit. She wiped her face with a shaky hand, took a breath, and said, “I used to work there.”

*

The article stated that the fire was due to mysterious circumstances, which almost certainly meant it was intentional. I loathed seeing Natalie so distraught. With no comfort to offer with mere words, I stood and moved to the corner where my drink cart lay in shambles. I searched the remnants, managing to find one unbroken glass, which I held out for Desmond to fill.

*

After returning to my knees in front of Natalie, I put the whiskey in her hand and said, “Drink, a ghrá.” She surprised me by not arguing, and I watched her sip the whiskey little by little. I knew she didn’t like it, but it made me feel better.

*

“Who sent the article?” Desmond asked.

“It’s a blocked number,” Callum answered, passing Natalie back her phone. With so many questions and very few answers, I decided all further discussions could wait. Neither Natalie nor Desmond were in any condition for prolonged conversations.

*

I took the empty glass from Natalie’s hand, setting it on the coffee table, before I scooped her up in my arms and said, “Come on, you’re going to bed.” Again, she surprised me by her lack of protest. She let me carry her out of the room and up the stairs without a fight. It’s not as though I wanted to argue with her, but the subdued woman in my arms was not the woman I married— the woman I’d come to care for.

*

I made my way to the master bedroom and carefully laid Natalie on my bed before she realized what I’d done. “Ronan…” she began, but I stopped her with a kiss. It was chaste and brief, but it shut her up. “I want you in my bed,” I told her. “I need to know you’re alright and safe.”

“Fine, just for tonight, though.”

“No,” I stated flatly. “You are my wife, and you’ll sleep in my bed.”

“Ronan—”

“Shh, baby. Lay down. We can argue about it in the morning once I know you’ve slept.”

*

I stroked her hair and said, “I need to make sure Desmond’s comfortable. Then, I’m coming right back. So, don’t bother trying to sneak back to the other room. As far as I am concerned, this is your room now. And I promise not to take advantage of you in your sleep.” My comment brought out a small smile from her, and she pointed out, “I thought you said you couldn’t be trusted?”

“I can when it’s necessary. And I won’t be able to sleep anymore tonight unless I know right where you are every second.” She simply closed her eyes and said, “Okay, I trust you.”

*

I was unprepared for the wave of emotion that accompanied my wife’s declaration. She trusted me. I thought I’d have to work for weeks, maybe months, to earn back Natalie’s trust. But after a single night, she already began opening herself to me again. I didn’t know what to make of it.

*

Back in the den, Desmond was unconscious, the bottle of whiskey was empty, and Callum lounged comfortably in the armchair chair, one leg draped over the side, texting and smiling like a fool. “Who the hell are you texting at this hour?” I inquired.

“I’ll tell you, but only if you promise to keep it from your wife.” I examined Desmond to be sure he was still breathing and his wounds weren’t bleeding. Callum’s comment snagged my attention. “Natalie?” I questioned. “Why would it concern her?” It occurred to me that I’d seen that look on him before— whenever he started sleeping with someone new. And if it concerned Natalie, that could only mean one thing…

*

“Oh God, Cal!” I groaned. “Please tell me you’re not sleeping with my assistant.”

“It’s not my fault Trina can’t keep her hands off me,” Callum replied in his defense.

“You know this isn’t going to end well. Liaisons of yours never do. And when it inevitably implodes, I’ll be the one dealing with the fallback. You realize the strain you’re putting on my relationship simply because you couldn’t keep your prick out of our mutual acquaintances?”

*

“Whoa,” Callum replied, sliding his leg off the arm of the chair and sitting up straighter. “Since when do you care so much about your wife’s feelings? You told me this was merely an arrangement. Either you lied… or something’s changed.”

“Everything has changed,” I whispered, searching the bottle for a few spare drops of whiskey. No such luck. Desmond had drained it dry.

*

“At the risk of sounding like a chick… wanna talk about it?” Callum suggested.

“Maybe when I can make sense of what she’s doing to my mind.”

“There’s your problem, my friend. It’s not your mind she’s affecting.” As Callum’s words hit home, I couldn’t help but be annoyed he knew me so well. All my life, I’d done my utmost to keep my friends at arm’s length. I prided myself in being unreadable. However, I hadn’t a hope of concealing the truth from Callum. We were too similar.

*

“Are you planning to stay or go home?” I asked. Callum went back to staring at his phone as he replied, “I’ll stay.”

“Fine. You know where everything is. See you in the morning, mo chara.” And I left him to his unscrupulous pursuit.

*

Expecting my wife to be sound asleep, I slipped silently back into my bedroom only to discover I was wrong. “What are you doing still awake?” I asked Natalie.

“I’m too worked up to sleep.”

“I can help with that.” The words had escaped before I could stop myself. It wasn’t a remotely appropriate time to seduce my wife. “I’m kidding, lass. … mostly.”

*

I got into the left side of the bed, leaving space between us. I couldn’t risk losing her trust again due to my roaming hands having a mind of their own. “Close your eyes, a ghrá,” I said. Then, I followed my own advice, closing my eyes as well. Still, I laid awake for a long while, unaccustomed to having a companion in my bed. Eventually, I began to drift off, but a soft sound brought me back to the surface. Natalie was crying. I could no longer keep my hands to myself. I shifted toward the center of the bed and pulled her to my chest.

*

I gently stroked Natalie’s head and asked, “Did you know them— the men who died?” She nodded against my body. “I only knew Gary as my boss; he owned the diner,” she told me when her tears began to taper off. “But Greg was more than a co-worker. He was a friend. He was kind, hardworking, and always brought humor to the job. More than once, he’d tried to set me up with his son.” It was odd, but for the first time in my life, I got a small taste of jealousy. I hated it.

*

“Why didn’t you go out with him?” I casually asked, tamping down irrational emotions.

“It was during a time in my life when I didn’t have time for relationships or the complications that usually came with them.” Her virginity began to make sense to me. She’d prioritized work or school over relationships and was slow to trust. We were more alike than I initially thought.

*

“Even though I turned him down every time,” Natalie continued, “Greg never held it against me. He always had my back at work. And the night I quit, he gave me money, knowing I was short on rent.”

“Why did you quit?” I asked.

“I had to,” she whispered, causing me to look down at her.

*

A sliver of moonlight spilled into the room, granting me a visual of Natalie’s silhouette. She bit her lip in hesitation. “Natalie,” I spoke softly, “I’m not pressuring you, but you know you can tell me anything.”

“You might be upset with me,” she muttered.

“Just tell me. I promise, for tonight at least, I won’t get angry, whatever it is.”

*

Natalie exhaled and said, “That day two weeks ago, when Alexi learned about my identity… it wasn’t the first time I saw him.”

“What do you mean?”

“My last day at the diner was not meant to be my last day. Alexi came in just after closing time to speak to Gary. I knew Gary had been in debt, but I hadn’t realized he’d borrowed money from the Russian mob until Greg told me that night. After seeing Alexi and learning who he was, I knew I had to leave.”

“That’s why when you realized he owned the building I was considering buying, you didn’t want any part of it,” I concluded.

“Yes.”

*

I rubbed Natalie’s back soothingly and said, “I’m not angry, baby, but I do wish you would’ve told me about Alexi that day.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I wondered if they were even true. Natalie was my best hope of gaining full ownership of OCE. If she had told me the truth and avoided Alexi’s notice in the process, she wouldn’t have been compelled to accept my proposal. Would I have even thought about marrying her had I not seen the danger she was in firsthand? Of course, I wanted her safe, but it was difficult to consider any reality in which Natalie wasn’t my wife. Only a couple weeks had passed since our rushed wedding, but I’d come to feel immensely comfortable as her husband.

*

Natalie nuzzled against my chest, making herself at home in my embrace, as she finally drifted off to sleep. Despite myself, I smiled in the darkness. I couldn’t torture myself with ‘what if’ scenarios. I could only be thankful things turned out the way they had. I owed it to Natalie to ensure her safety. I resolved to meet with Anatoli Alexeyev as soon as possible. It was time to face the problem head-on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~