Absolute Silence

21

Did I want the freedom to explore? I shifted my weight in my seat and felt the residual warmth of my spankings. Everything about our time in that room had been perfect, aside from the awkward ending. The only exploring I wanted to do at the moment was between Filip De Luca and myself. I offered Dante a tight smile. “I appreciate that.” Pulling my hand from his, I glanced down and noticed an intricate gold initial ring engraved with a lion’s head on the thick sides and the letters D and L stacked together on the flat face of the ring. It was an odd design, considering the initials seemed backward, but it was clearly a tribute to the club. “This place is your baby, isn’t it?” “It’s been my life for the past five years.” Five years? He couldn’t have been much older than me when he started the business. How intriguing. “s*x club owner isn’t the average career choice. What made you decide to open the Den?” His face split in a devious grin. “They say do something you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.” I chuckled and took a sip from my drink. “Actually, that’s not that far off. I wanted to do something I enjoyed, and I hated school. Got into trouble all the time. I’d rather work with people than numbers. And what better business than s*x? There’s a ton of money in it, and it didn’t take me long to figure out this city needed a high-end place people could trust to protect their secrets and provide a clean, safe environment to explore their sexuality.” “You almost make it sound charitable,” I teased. Those twin dimples made an appearance. “That’s me. I’m a charitable kind of guy.” I shook my head with a laugh. “All right, Saint Dante, I better go. I promised Filip one drink only.” Dante’s smile faded. “If that’s what you want.” His hand gently closed around my upper arm. “Just remember, you always have options.” Was Dante making a move on me? He’d been nothing but professional upon meeting him, but maybe he dabbled in club life more than he let on. I didn’t know how I felt about his advance. It was flattering, but my interest was focused elsewhere at the moment. I cleared my throat. “I’ll keep that in mind.” He nodded once, his thumb giving me a single gentle caress before he slipped from his seat. “Come on, I’ll walk you out.” OceanofPDF.com 9 FILIP What the f**k was wrong with me? I questioned my sanity as I stalked away from Camilla and Dante. From the moment she’d walked into the Den, my control was shredded. She was a vision—a f*****g temptress—and the yearning she stirred within me was terrifying. I battled against my instincts the entire time we were together. The need to claim her. To assure and protect her. I’d marked her as though she were already mine. A few more minutes in that room with her and I would have catapulted us down a road we couldn’t come back from. It was bad enough I’d instituted exclusivity beyond the club. I’d never intended to set such a restrictive standard, but watching her eye the crowd at that bar and imagining her taking home some asshole made me furious. I couldn’t let it happen. Each step I took to control the situation only left me feeling more disoriented and powerless. My life was a runaway car barreling down a mountainside, and I couldn’t convince my foot to ease off the gas. As if I had a death wish. If I allowed my hunger for her to take root, I would succumb to the emotion. My need for her would govern my thoughts and color all of my choices, and her presence would completely upend my life as I knew it. I could sense the change with a growing certainty that engulfed me in a storm of unease. If I bound myself to her, my life would never be the same. I was being ripped apart by two competing desires, neither rooted in an ounce of logic. The result was a desperation that permeated my entire being. An insidious compulsion tugging me to have her was as strong as the one to walk away. I needed both at the same time—couldn’t breathe without them—yet there was no middle ground.If I didn’t find a way to control myself soon, I’d drive myself insane. Perhaps it would be best to just tell her father. He’d make sure she never left home again, guaranteeing she couldn’t disrupt my life any further, and I would have no choice in the matter. The prospect was tempting. Anything to end my torment. I blew through the front door of the club, almost careening straight into a woman reaching for the door. She gasped as she stumbled backward, nearly tumbling to the ground. I clasped her arms, steadying her as recognition set in. “Liana, I apologize. Are you all right?” “No harm done.” She grinned broadly. “It’s lovely to see you, Filip. Are you leaving so early?” I dropped my hands when I sensed a rising heat in her gaze. Liana was frequently at the club, and we’d been known to entertain one another when the mood struck. Not exactly regularly, but often enough that we shared a certain familiarity. More than I did with most women. She was beautiful, petite with a curvy body that she worked to her every advantage. But her most striking features were her green eyes and natural red hair that sparked in the light. She possessed an enchanting beauty, yet she’d never tempted me half as much as Camilla. If I were to suggest it, I had no doubt Liana would join me inside and do her best to eradicate all thoughts of Camilla from my head. The idea was appealing. An escape might provide relief from the ever-worsening bisection taking place inside my mind—two warring desires wrenching me apart in a most violent fashion. As much as I craved an escape from myself, breaking my pact with Camilla would only inject further venom into the festering wound inside me. “Yes, I’m afraid I have to go. Things are in full swing, so I’m sure you’ll have a lovely evening.” Liana’s smile wavered. “Yes, of course. See you soon, then.” I nodded my goodbye and fled for home.