Changing Her Stars

Chapter Four

Leira ate her breakfast in relative silence. She hadn’t much of an appetite, but with how weak she was feeling, she knew that she should regain some of her strength. She’d be married tomorrow, whether she wanted it or not. She was certain that Duke Montero wouldn’t listen to any of her reasons of objection. He seemed to have made up his mind thoroughly. For whatever reason.

Hilda helped her dress in a modest gown of light pink and silver. It suited her frame well and showed her curves in a tasteful manner. She then let Hilda guide her around the manor, which was to be her home until they returned to Ardroth Castle. It was where her husband spent most of his time, as it bordered the Human and Elven borders. His job was to monitor the borders as well as keep the peace between the two nations since he was an ambassador for the king. According to Hilda, they were in Loris, the kingdom’s capital that she’d never been to despite promises from her ex-husband, for two weeks. Duke Montero meant to wed her there and finalize the marriage certificate, introduce her to the royal family officially as his wife, and then leave for Ardroth.

Walking around the manor, Leira was overwhelmed by the sheer amount of wealth displayed. In every room, whether it was the foyer, the formal dining, bedrooms and guest rooms, parlors, conservatories, or even studies, gold practically dripped off the walls. There were gold chandeliers, gold trim on the curtains, gold accents, or gold encrusted chairs. Duke Montero certainly had an expensive taste, which seemed fitting of his gallant personality, at least according to the rumors she’d heard.

By the time lunch arrived, she was not only completely tired out, but she was seated in the beautiful garden in front of a luscious array of foods. Leira had never seen so many different dishes, even as a viscountess, though she knew that the title only held meaning if she’d been able to produce an heir. She sat, sipping her tea, and wondering what this next marriage would look like to such a well-known man and hero to the people. He certainly had a reputation that she would need to contend with. Leira was sure that the other noblewomen would look down on her for not only being divorced, but also due to her new husband's many affairs. Rumors were vicious in such circles, and she felt tired from simply thinking about the mental combat she’d be put through.

She sighed as she picked at her plate. Everything tasted delightful, but her appetite had vanished.

“Please, miss. Eat a lil more,” Hilda encouraged as she watched Leira push her food around.

Leira smiled graciously at her and obliged by forcing herself to consume a bit more but had to stop after a few more bites. She found herself thinking about what her days would be like as a duchess. Would it be in name only, as she was when she was a viscountess? Would the servants continue to be cordial to her? Would Duke Montero have any interest in her besides wanting an heir? Would he also divorce her if she wasn’t able to give him what he wanted?

“Worr’in won’t ‘elp. Best ta keep ya mind clear, eh?” Hilda grinned at her.

“Is it that obvious?”

As Hilda pointed to her forehead, Leira chuckled lightly, smoothing her features out. The last thing she needed was to get early on-set wrinkles. From judging the women Duke Montero had been with, she needed all the help she could get. They had been gorgeous, and well, she did not live up to that standard.

“Hilda, do you know if Duke Montero will have any use for me besides the obvious?”

“What dooya mean, m’lady?”

Leira swallowed nervously. “I mean, do you think I’ll only be duchess in name once we’re married or do you think he will actually use my skills that I’ve spent a majority of my life working on?”

“Why wouldn’t I use them?” a low voice asked from behind her.

She froze, feeling like she was just caught doing something naughty. The duke walked confidently around into her field of vision and sat across from her. He peered at her plate and seemed satisfied with how it was mostly empty.

“Do you want to use your skills? I mean, it sounds as though you’ve been working on honing them for most of your life,” he said with an edge of sarcasm and a half-grin.

Leira blushed. “My apologies, m’lord.”

“Rin,” he corrected.

“I did not mean to insinuate anything untoward about–”

He waved a hand in the air, which silenced her immediately. “If you wish to work, then I certainly will have things for you to do. If you wish to sit around and eat cookies and drink tea all day, then that is fine with me as well.”

After a moment of quiet, Leira spoke up, “I–I’d like to work, if you don’t mind.”

“What are you good at?”

“Um, I know how to keep ledgers, manage households, host events, read and write, and I am very good at organization. Whatever is needed within the household, I am able to accomplish.”

“Even for larger ones like my estates?”

She nodded slowly. “I am a quick learner. Though your properties are larger than I’m used to, I wouldn’t mind the challenge.”

“I’ll see to it,” he said, his eyes shrewdly studying her. “After tomorrow, of course.”

“Naturally, Your Grace.”

“Rin.”

Leira took an awkward sip from her teacup as she turned her gaze to view the flowers next to her. They were beautiful. They were crisp white petals with a deep pink bleeding from the inside, near the yellow center, out to the edges of the petals. Reaching a hand out, she gently caressed the flower and smiled at it.

“Do you like them?” he asked.

“They’re beautiful.”

Taking in her demeanor, he posed the question, “Do I… frighten you, Leira?”

His abruptness drew her attention and she briefly met his eyes before lowering them to stare at the table. “Why do you ask?”

He gestured with an open palm at her. “Because of this. You can’t even really look me in the eyes. You act as if I’d slap you for doing so. You wear a guarded expression when I do get you to look at me, and you tighten your body when I come near.”

The bluntness of his observations sliced through her. Leira hadn’t been aware of just how perceptive Duke Montero was to her behaviors. She had been all but invisible to most everyone in her life in the past decade, and she had grown used to that lifestyle. Even becoming comfortable with it.

“I apologize if it displeases you, m’lord.”

“Rin! Please, for the love of–” he raked a hand through his hair as he yelled out in frustration. “It’s Rin to you. How can I break down your barriers if you continue to address me so formally?”

Leira winced at his outburst. She hadn’t meant to upset him.

“Please don’t react like that,” he pleaded, feeling distraught at her obvious discomfort. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper.”

“I’m sorry for–”

He stood up quickly, sighing loudly. “Don’t bother apologizing. I’ll see you tonight,” he then said curtly, walking away before she could even respond.

Leira stared at his retreating figure, wondering just how long it would take before he sent her packing back to father as her ex-husband had. Though she attempted to do everything correctly, it still wasn’t good enough. It would never be good enough. She was a failure, and the sooner Duke Montero saw it, the better. She could live out the remainder of her days locked away in her father’s house. She’d done it before, so she could do it again if necessary. Or, her father would end her life, and then she’d never need to worry about these things again.

The rest of the day passed by rather slowly. Hilda stuck to her side, even through dinner. This time, the duke did not attempt to join her. She almost asked if she could sleep in a different room when Hilda brought her to the door of his bedroom. Leira doubted that he would actually want to see her that night. However, the request died on her lips as Hilda pushed her through and helped her change into a nightgown.

Tonight would mark the final night of being a single divorcee. By this time tomorrow, she would be required to consummate the second marriage she wanted no part in. She shuddered with fear as her mind brought unpleasant thoughts about her first night with Viscount Chancer. He had been a disgustingly rotund man and always wore the odor of stale alcohol, made worse by his attempt to mask it with cologne. He had been rough with her, not even giving her a second to understand what was happening as he hiked up her gown, pushed her down onto the bed, and forced himself on her. The man had fallen asleep as soon as he had finished his part, leaving her to feel scared, alone, and a shell of the person she’d been.

Leira sat on the bed, holding her knees to her chest as she desperately attempted to rid herself of those horrible memories. Tears slid down her cheeks as she recalled some of the worst nights of her life. She must’ve fallen asleep in such a posture because she could only vaguely remember warm hands gently prodding at her. She then felt those hands embrace her and cocoon her in a warm bubble. Snuggled in the warmth, she fell into the first blissfully, dreamless state she could recall in a decade.