The Sight Beyond The Haze

Chapter 71: Purest Wish

My sigh was long and deep.

I looked down at her. At Idris, who just a little girl, crying over the body of a cub lion. Its coat was golden, pure and very soft to the touch and even to the eyes. Despite its softness though, there was a lingering danger wihin those golden eyes of the animal. In front of the little girl, I saw a woman who looked similar to mine but was actually closer to Idris' countenance than mine.

She was wearing a very formal suit complete with a flowy robe and was also looking down at Idris. Her eyes were mine but the ferocity within her pair was Idris'. But it was evident who that woman was.

It was our birth mother, Erina Alaric, the current ruler of the Eirini who has been a leading force behind one of the mainlands of the Dalcanoraz and the royal family's biggest supporter.

Her eyes were cold, even colder than mine. I could only remember her with the little fragments of my memories. She had been a kind mother to me and a loving wife to her husband. And she was beautiful beyond compare with a serene smile and the commanding authoritative air of a just ruler.

But she had been different to her second child, I could see.

The little girl knelt in front of the mother, tears were on her face, dripping to her chin and cheeks. Her head bowed down and I could see that her hands were trembling slightly, but Idris' eyes were her most beautiful asset. She could look at me and make me feel the tremble within my bones.

"Mother," she said firmly without any hint of stutter, not even of any expression.

"You didn't tame it," Erina told the little girl. Erina was holding the cub on ita neck, its paws were flinging all around, suspended on the air and without any "You made it love you and that is the reason you weakened it. You took away its teeth and claws with pretense of your love, cooing it when it made a mistake and cradling it like a newborn."

Little Idris' jaw clenched tightly, looking at the small cub on her mother's hand. She knew what would happen to the cub and it will never left her mother's hands while it was still warm and breathing.

I took pity on that little girl with her cub.

"Now look at it!" Erina snapped at her. "You have basically took away its life. I told you to train it, but you tame it. How could you expect it to survive the wild while it depends on you?"

Idris' lips quivered as though she wanted to say something but she held herself back, clenching her haw more tightly. On this body, I would guess that Idris was only six years old. Her hair had been cut very short, unruly and unkempt. There was a gash on her cheek and blood stains on her little denim overalls and she was kneeling.

"Th-then..." Idris started, her hope of getting the little cub was smashing away. "Then I will tw-twain it, I won't love it. I... I will not love it. Pwease, momma."

But Erina, just like how she was described and seen by Idris, was heartless. With a loud c***k, Erina's other hand found the neck of the cub and broke it. With a shriek, Idris stood up from her kneeling position and caught the corpse of the cub while Erina threw it down to her. She sobbed, not wanting to look at the cub but she hugged it dearly on her little arms and chest.

"No! Nooo, pwease, no... no," she pleaded.

Idris shook the body of the cub, pleading for the cooling body to wake up, but its eyes have already rolled back and its paws were limp.

"Momma, mommaaa..." Idris wailed and cried like a little girl. Her eyes were asking Erina why did she have to do that, waiting for any explanation but Erina has already turned her back on Idris.

"You disappointed me, Idris," she said to her so coldly that I also shivered. "You are the one who took its life away. You did not train it the way I told you to, you only loved it and for that it has to pay a price. Why are you crying now? After what you have done! You should be disappointed in yourself too, and be ashamed for crying for such a petty animal."

I was standing behind door, only glimpsing the situation from afar. I wanted to walk in on the scene but my feet was unable to, wielding its control on my feet. When Erina exited through the other door, I finally breathed a sigh of relief and went inside the room where Idris was still crying.

She was still shaking the corpse of the little animal. Although I think that her young mind has already accepted the fact that the cub won't be waking up again ever, there was still the anger and sadness. After a minute, she laid the corpse of the cub down on the cold floor.

She knelt in front of it. Unlike how she was kneeling in front of her mother which was in desperate and in fear, she was now kneeling as a sign of respect. She was bowing for a lost soul forcibly taken away from its body. She did not sob any longer nor did she shed any tear anymore.

She just knelt there on her own, contemplating about something with her mins as her brows were knitted together.

"Idris," I called out to her.

I slowly walked, waiting for her to give me any indication that I was a welcomed guest here. But she only gazed at me with puzzlement and askance expression on her eyes.

"Who aw you?" she said, her 'rr' sound was still barely making it out in between her tongue and the roof of her mouth.

I hesitated, my foot stopped and my hand that wanted to stretch out to pat her back was also just there, frozen. Who was I even? I was her sister who could not even remember her name or the fact that I actually have a sister in the first place.

"I... I am your older sister," I whispered. Then I realized that she must not have heard me from the expression on her face. She still have that askance look and she slightly tilted her head at me, her short hair that curled on her ears were swaying with the motion. "I am your older sister," I repeated for her in a clearer voice. "I'm sorry about his death."

That expression on her fianlly faded and Idris nodded, her eyes were casted down on the corpse of the cub. Her hand reached out to it, its fluffy coat buried her hand on it while she feel its body.

"It's a hew," she responded while not looking at me. "And it was my fault."

It my time to clench my jaw. I think I heard something pop on my temple when I heard her say that. I shook my head and also knelt beside her. I was so tall in comparison to this six year old body of Idris that even when I knelt beside her, I still draw a long and an enormous shadow against her.

"It was not your hand that killed it," I countered with her.

"But it was my actions that led fow such faith."

We knelt in silence for a few more minutes before Idris finally decided to stood up. She was a little wobly, maybe from kneeling for so long. Her feet betrayed her and she almost fell down. Fortunately, I was there to grab her fragile and small body even before she made an impact to the floor.

"Thank you," she murmured in a very low tone.

"If you did not mean to do it and only did what you thought was right, then it was not wrong," I still told her. "By loving the cub, you did not hurt anybody. You could still teach it to be vicious and smart without taking away anything from it."

Just like you, I suddenly thought. No one needed to take anything away from you just to teach you a lesson.

I knelt again in front of her, preparing my smile. My hands held both of her shoulders, making her stare into my own eyes. When she did, her eyes were red from the crying and her lips trembled still. This must have been how Idris looked like before she came to where her ability was today.

She must have worked hard and strived despite the difficulties.

"It is fine to cry when you feel like it and love is not a weakness, do you understand?" I asked her.

Idris was still hesitant at first, but her head slowly nodded at me. She picked up the corpse of the cub, her head turning up to stare at me. I immediately knew what she wanted to do but was too shy to have any initiative to say.

So I did it anyway.

"Do you want to bury the cub?"

Again, she nodded but, this time though, she was wearing a small smile. There were still tears on her eyes but not so much that it blurred her eyes to the point of not seeing anything. The low hump on her shoulders indicated her misery but there was a certain bounce on her each step.

"Gweat Uncle Weigh told me that the dead should be honowed," she told me. It was to my surprised that she suddenly held my hand as we both walk out of the wretched room. "So they would be we...we-wenated?"

A lopsided smile appeared on her lips, her eyes were asking for help.

"Reincarnated?" I asked to her.

"Something like that!" she said enthusiastically.

Idris was cradling her cub on her arm like it was a baby. Her mood seemed to have lightened up. Our hands were swinging lightly as we passed through the hallways and rooms. This place seemed so desolated and lonely. I was a little afraid to know if this place was also the place where Idris grew up in.

"Where are the people?"

Little Idris shrugged nonchalantly, not really caring. My eyes drifted from a door to another then to an empty room that has its door opened. All devoid of any human being.

"I've always been awone," she told me. She bowed her head and kissed the little head of the cub she was holding.

It broke my heart to see her like this.

"Lonely," I whispered but she shook her head at me.

"Just because I'm alone does not mean I'm wonewy," she contradicted, "often times, we could find weace in sowee—tude and I think that's weally nice."

I pursed my lips.

Peace in solitude.

I did not realized how similar we were to each other. I looked at my fading hand, it was almost up to my elbow and it was quite scary but this was more important. I could get out of here with Idris on tow, but this part of her would not heal if it was not addressed.

"But it is good to have people around too. The noise might be too loud at times, but those noise could turned into sweet music that would give you comfort and guide you through that solitude you were trapped in."

I have known my sister for exactly three hours, maybe more since I could not really tell the time here inside the temporal illusory fragment. I have known her for a short period of time but I felt at ease with her.

I felt that I have also experienced that kind of solitude and, for a long time, I also thought it was fine to be inside of that space... alone.

"I want hew to be buwied somewhe-ee she could see the sun w-w-rise," Idris said and pointed at the courtyard that was full of blooming flowers.

Though the inside of the house was quite stuffy, when we get outside, it was a whole new world. I could feel the breeze flashed in my face and it was quite nice. I started digging on the ground with a shovel that Idris found on the toolshed just beside the location of the house. When I was done digging up the dirt, we laid her cub gently on the earth.

Idris knelt beside the grave, dirtying her already filthy overall. She kissed her fingers then touched the cub with those fingers.

"Goodnight, Hua," she whispered and smiled.

It looked that the cub was only sleeping. When we were on our journey out of the house, Idris has already slid the lids of the cub down to cover its rolled back eyes. I went to get a rock for the cub's tombstone.

I pointed my index finger and put magical energy on it. I was not an expert and it was a little shoddy, I think, but it was still better than nothing.

The tombstone only says seven words:

Here lies Hua, a beautiful golden lion.

When I turned back to where little Idris was, she was already back to the Idris I initially met earlier this night.