Don't Go (Spencer Reid x Reader)
985 Words
It had been two months since Spencer left. The image of the clock reading 4:57 was ingrained inside my mind. I was lying in bed while he showered and when he came back he kissed me on the head, grabbed his suitcase, and was gone. It was typical for Spencer to leave me for a couple weeks at a time so I wasn’t worried. But the two weeks he was supposed to be gone turned into months. My calls weren’t returned and I was left at home wondering what I’d done wrong.
Out of the blue this morning, stepping out of the shower, there was a voicemail left on my phone. Spencer Reid it read. I smile at the voice I’d been missing for so long. “So anyways…” He rambled on in the message, “I’ve set up reservations for Sakura, I know it’s your favorite. And it’s at 8… So it’d be really nice to see you.”
-
You saw Spencer before he saw you. He was in the furthest table, hands clasp around a steaming mug. His hair had grown since the last time you’d seen him and it was completely disheveled. The already dark circles beneath his eyes were even darker. I guess he’s been sleeping about as much as I have, which would be practically none at all.
As soon as he spots me walking towards the table, he sits up straight and gives me a smile. I can’t tell if it’s genuine or not. I sit and return the forced smile, not sure what to say. He reaches over and takes my hands into his own, his thumb rubbing over my fingers like he always used to do.
“I’m so sorry, (y/n)” he starts off slowly, avoiding meeting my eyes. “I sorry that I haven’t been around or returned your calls or emailed or drove to your house like I wanted to…. I want to, I did…. I was so busy with work which I know isn’t an excuse and-”
“Spencer. Slow down.” I stop him from continuing. He finally looks up at me and his eyes are bloodshot and watery. He pulls away to wipe away the tears.
“I’m just sorry.” He says again.
“Spencer I just don’t understand.” Now it was my turn to start crying. A stray tear rolls down my cheek. I’m so angry but seeing him here in front of me, visibly upset and obviously overwhelmed, I just want to curl up next to him and tell him everything will be okay.
“(Y/N), I have to work so much. I barely have any down time and when I do I’m so tired. I’m no fun to be around, I’m grumpy and irritable… I recently found out my mom is doing worse and I can’t do anything to help… I haven’t slept in weeks and all I wanted was to come see you but you deserve so much more than me… but I love you, (y/n)... But god I’m just so tired.” He put his head down on the table. From the way his shoulders were moving up and down I knew he was crying.
I wiped my own tears as I realized it was my turn to be the strong one. As hurt as I was, I loved Spencer.
“Hey,” I whisper while grabbing his hands, “Spencer let’s go home.” He lifts his head and starts to protest but we begin walking to my car before he can finish his sentence.
-
“Well,” I start as I walk out of my bedroom with a pair of sweats that he’d left at my apartment months ago but I stop when I hear snoring. Glancing down, I see Spencer sprawled out on my couch fast asleep.
I smile fondly at him and quickly turn off the tv and curl up beside him. It’s cramped on the little couch but I don’t mind. My small body fits perfectly against his long, lanky one. “Goodnight” I whisper and kiss his cheek before dozing off.
I’m woken some time in the morning by Spencer shifting beside me. “(Y/N), (Y/N)” His voice is raspy and deep. “Hmmm?” I groan, not wanting to be awake.
“I should go…”
My eyes snap open and I spring upwards. “Spencer, you don’t have to.”
He rubs his eyes and yawns. The dark circles aren’t so bad but I can still see the sadness in his eyes.
“(Y/N), you deserve so much better than what I can give you and it’s killing me.”
I push his chest till he’s leaning back against the couch cushion and I move until my face is less than an inch away. Spencer’s breathing quickens and I reach my hand to his cheek, rubbing his scruff. I close the gap and press my lips to his.
“I’ve missed you so goddamn much.” He mumbles against my mouth. My fingers are wrapped in his curly hair at the nape of his neck.
Before this goes further, I pull away and hug him. “I love you.” I breath. “I don’t care what you say about me not deserving you. We’ll make this work. We’re going to be okay.”
- Writer
