While the rest of the world was asleep, I was wide awake, yesterday’s events replaying in my head on a loop.
I was pregnant. Or so the doctor said.
I believed him. The sickness I have been feeling for the past few weeks telling me, warning me that something wasn’t right with my body. I finally decided it was time to see a doctor about the way I have been feeling, only for him to tell me my worst nightmare just became a reality.
I didn’t hate the baby, I just hated the idea of being pregnant without the support of the father behind me. I didn’t know him, I didn’t remember what his face looked like it was so dark in the room we were in. I barely even remembered his voice, just the gruff words he would whisper in my ear, how he liked making love to me, how he wished he could do it for the rest of his life, how amazing I was and how beautiful.
I also remembered vividly how he would take me over and over again, one after the other with barely any rest in between. My face and body flushed just thinking about that night, of how stupid I was for allowing him to enter me without protection over and over again. That’s what got me in this predicament.
A month ago felt like an eternity and I had no idea how I was supposed to reach out to the father, not that I wanted to do that, that was embarrassing. A girl he had a random night with showing up out of the blue saying she was pregnant? I was sure to be a laughing stock.
It was times like these I really missed my mother and the advice that she would give. Silent tears rolled down my cheeks for the situation I had now found myself in, for the loss of my mother, I will never stop mourning for that. I also wanted to weep for the friendship I lost with my best friend. I never in a million years thought that I would lose such a relationship with one of the most important people in my life.
The sun started to peek on the horizon and it dawned on me that I barely had a wink of sleep. Movement down the hall alerted me of the fact that I wasn’t the only one up at the ass c***k of dawn. The shuffling sounds moved closer to my door until it was directly in front of it.
“Jessica, you open the door this instant.” My father pounded on the door.
Ever since mom died the relationship between the both of us has been strained. We never sit and have civil conversations anymore, they always turn into screaming matches between us. And it didn’t help the situation any that he got married not even a month after mom passed, and to my best friend no less.
That was why the relationship between my best friend and I was now non-existent. I had to find out the hard way that she was sleeping with my father way before mom got sick and died. I found them in a very compromising position in the kitchen of all places, and nobody wanted to witness their father going at it with someone else important in their life.
I’m all for getting some, but don’t get it where it’s open and anyone could see you and definitely don’t get it with your best friend’s married father.
Before I could even consider opening the door for the raging bull on the other side, it was kicked in by a furious looking James.
James was of a built stature and I hated to say it but his physique looked good for a man in his late fifties. His salt and pepper hair was all over the place probably from running his hands through it multiple times and his grey hairs were really starting to show through. He always cares so much about appearances so he dyes his hair black whenever his grey hairs gets too prominent. He didn’t look his age and that was what probably drew my best friend in, not to mention my mother. His ice blue eyes is easily his most attractive feature they were so unusual, and his sharp jaw and full mouth spoke of business transactions. He was a businessman through and through.
“What is the meaning of this?” he holds up a paper that he had fisted in his hands. It was now a bit crumpled but I could still see what was on the paper.
My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach at the ultrasound picture that he held in his big hands. How did he get that? Nobody knew that I had that, nobody knew that I went to the doctor’s office.
“How could you do this to me? How could you disgrace me like this?” he shouted at me when I didn’t react to the picture.
“James would you please calm down? You’re scaring her.” Came the voice of my ex best friend Nancy.
She walked hurriedly into the room, rushing to my father’s side to rub his shoulders softly.
It made bile rise in my throat every time I thought about them together, every time I thought about the fact that she was now my stepmother, about how she betrayed our friendship and my trust to get that position.
I hated them both. The two people who I had left in this life who I considered a safe haven after my mother passed was now the two most hated people in my life and I wanted nothing more than the both of them gone out of my life.
“Explain yourself this instant.” James seethed.
“I don’t have to explain anything to you.” I responded quickly, but it was the wrong thing to say.
Before I knew it, my left cheek was stinging with the slap that James delivered. A tear fought its way to my eye but I refused to let it fall, he would never get that satisfaction from me.
“How dare you speak to me in that manner?” he shouted at me.
“James please. She’s pregnant, calm down.” Nancy tried to soothe James.
“I know she’s pregnant, that’s why we’re having this conversation!” He screamed at Nancy and shrugged her hand off him.
“You call this a conversation?” I quipped. “It’s always a screaming match between us, it always will be.”
I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that they knew I was pregnant. I just found out yesterday and I kept the information to myself so how did they know this? How did James get his hands on my ultrasound picture?
“You both need to calm down is what needs to happen.” Nancy said sternly.
“No. What needs to happen is you need to get out of my house. It’s a shame I already arranged for you to go to college. If I could, I would withdraw every funds I ever spent on your worthless self.” James spat hatefully. “Disgraceful, just like your mother.”
“What’s disgraceful is you marrying a 21 year old not even a month after your wife died.” I clapped back.
I saw his hand raised into the air. I saw it come down to my face, but it never made an impact.
I looked up to see Nancy stood in between James and I. She was whispering something to him so softly I could barely hear her. James let his hand drop to his side and left my room, not without giving me a scathing glare.
While I was thankful to Nancy for acting as a buffer between me and my father at all times, I didn’t want her to think everything was okay with the both of us. I was still hurt and feeling betrayed by her.
Nancy was a very pretty red headed girl. Her green eyes complimented the coppery colour of her hair and her high cheekbones and beautiful heart shaped face had all the guys in school falling all over her. She turned every one of them down and I always wondered why. How we became fast friends was still a mystery to me. We met in the second year of high school when I spilled my lunch in the cafeteria because of bullies.
Yes bullying is still a thing, people never grow up.
A girl named Anastacia knocked over my lunch tray all because her boyfriend asked me a question in math class that he didn’t know the answer to. Nancy stood up for me when Anastacia tried to push me down into the spilt lunch. And she has always been the buffer between me and basically the entire world.
I would have been happy for her being an even bigger part of my life if she had been straightforward with me from the start. The fact that she was sleeping with my dad the entirety of high school and beyond while my dad was still married to my mom, and also the fact that she visited my house so often under the pretences of spending time with me but it was really my dad she wanted to spend time with.
We would sit at the dinner table and have dinner, have laughs and chats like we were one big happy family. She barely spent time at her own house since her parents were hardly ever home and really didn’t care what she did. You could say that she was kind of a spoilt child, which is why it was so easy for her to betray me to get what she wanted. I had no doubts in my mind that she was with my dad because of the vast fortune that he had attached to his name.
“Are you okay?” Nancy asked me.
“As if you care?” I spat.
“What are you talking about? Of course I care about you Jess!” She exclaimed. “We’re best friends.”
“We were best friends Nancy, were.” I glared at her.
She looked at me with hurt in her eyes but I felt nothing for her. I wanted her to feel the hurt I felt when I had to find out from everyone else that my best friend was screwing my dad. I was the laughing stock of the town for walking around with the girl that was in a relationship with a man twice her age, for having a dad that was dating a minor.
“Fine then. The car will be here in a few minutes so ensure that you are ready, you don’t want to keep the driver waiting.” She sniffed.
“Fine. If you both want to get rid of me that badly.” I turned away from her to begin packing a bag in my closet.
“It’s nothing personal, your dad just wants what’s best for you and he doesn’t want to be talked down to because he has a daughter who is with child out of wedlock.”
“What are you blabbing about?” I asked irritated.
“I’m pregnant Jessica.” She rubbed her non-existent tummy.
The bile that was threatening to come up ever since they both stepped into my room was now back at full force and it was not letting up. I dashed into the bathroom to empty my stomach’s contents, the acrid smell permeating the air. After heaving over the toilet for a few minutes, I got up and flushed the disgusting mess down the drain, walked to the sink and brushed my teeth and splashed some water on my face to wash away the nightmare this day was slowly becoming.
“Marrying a man way older than you are wasn’t enough for you, you had to get pregnant too?” I say vexed.
“There is nothing you can do about it Jessica, just embrace it.” She smiled tightly at me.
“This was your idea wasn’t it? You want me gone so that you can have my father all to yourself. So you can raise your brand new family without me in the way.”
“I knew there was a reason you graduated top of the class. You’re so smart Jess.” She clapped slowly.
“You need to get packing. Don’t want to be late for your flight.” She smiled maliciously at me before leaving my room, finally.
I sat on the edge of my bed and took one last look around my room. I knew that I would never see the interior of this house again if Nancy and my father has any say in it, especially now that she was ‘pregnant’. I decided to just throw some clothes in my suitcase not caring what went in it. I had some money saved up from all the allowances dad would give me in my younger years and my bank account was topped up from his money as well. I didn’t want his money, I would get a part time job while in college to help support myself and my unborn child. I would do this without anyone’s help and we were going to be okay.
The car pulled up to the front of the house just as I lugged my suitcase downstairs. Nancy and James was standing at the doorway waiting to kick me out of the house, Nancy was grinning as she couldn’t wait to be rid of me.
“Try not to be a disappointment in college too.” James said maliciously.
“We’ll miss you.” Nancy tried to hug me but I sidestepped her. She played it off as if it was nothing.
“Can’t say the same for you both.” I sniped and made my way into the car while the driver puts my suitcase in the trunk.
I wouldn’t miss this place one bit, I would only miss the memories that were created here.