When the Heart sings...-1
2009 Words
When the Heart sings...The story dedicated to
My Life and my wife…
Mrs. Suchismita Pani
W hen do you want to hear a ‘Lovely song’...?
When there is some pain or some most precious happiness of life in our heart; when there is some restlessness or some comfort that has gotten after a hard work; No matter whatever it is...; joy or misery, comfort or restlessness, that song made from the heart gives them a new destination… gives life a new twist…
This happiness, this sorrow, this discomfort and this calmness; what all these are...?
“Feelings…” And whenever there is such a feeling in the heart, it automatically becomes a beautiful song. Be with, like a true companion throughout life. Helps; ever in searching for a new life or ever in gathering the lost moments of the past life…
No matter how late, how much time goes out, but one day…, everything gets back... everything… just like my life…
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“Shruti…! You like Jalebi so much naa...?”
[Jalebi – A very well-known dish in Indian traditional sweets]
“Yeah dad…!”
“You sit here! I will bring hot-hot jalebis for you right now.”
“Ok dad…!”
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“Really…! Everything has changed. Whenever I try to look at my past life, I feel very strange. Never thought that my life would change so soon and in this way… But this is true and today, I am very happy with this truth of my life…
I’m Shruti…! Shruti Singhania…! And I live here… in Mumbai… Just 5 minutes’ walk distance from “Juhu beach”...
Today when I came towards this sea, my mind was completely relaxed; no stress, no tension, no questions; nothing… When Papa called me to go for a walk, I couldn’t describe the feelings that I felt. I was able to feel the joy of his heart nicely. It was clearly visible in his eyes that he is starting to be desperate to give me the happiness of my rights. He seems happy with my happiness more than me. Just with this, all the aspirations of a daughter are fulfilled. I want nothing more than this. Today, I can openly say that my father is the best father in this world.
But, some days ago there was nothing like this. My life was totally different. For peace, relaxation, smile, happiness, there was no place in my life. If my mind desired then I used to eat and drink. If my mind desired then I used to go to school. If my mind didn't wish for anything then either I used to sleep or used to go somewhere far away from all this. Nobody used to stop me. Nobody used to oppose me. Nobody used to say anything to me. When the mind becomes more depressed then I used to walk here; to this beach, with lots of complaints, lots of questions in mind. But, when I used to look for someone to ask then, I couldn't see anyone near me. Then when the pain used to increase more than limit, I used to talk to myself and with this sea. Yes! It is true that it didn't erase my heartache but, it used to fall a little. Always kept thinking that I don't know; what’s my relationship with this sea and with its restless waves who repeatedly pull me here. Begins to feel something special; something much my own, which I can’t take away from my life even if I want to…
That time, I wasn't going alone. Someone else used to be with me. Such a friend with whom every pain of my heart became a beautiful song. The song, by singing which, I used to fall in love with the life that had been separated for years.”
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“Take this Shruti...! Your… hot-hot Jalebis…!
Hey Shruti…! What is this…? You had forgotten your friend in the car...! Take…!”
“No dad...! I didn't forget it; rather I left intentionally. Because, I think, today, I don't need this friend, this violin anymore. Today, I have no unfulfilled wish, no unfinished dream. Neither any shortage nor any need; so, there is no pain either. So..., no song can be made without pain.”
“Daughter...! Don’t you remember what Mama said?
“For life, as much as grief matters, happiness also matters that much. No matter what the situation, life never leaves us alone, so why should we leave the accompaniment of life?”
Our own joy depends on us and our own sorrow also depends on us. The way we try to see this life, this life starts appearing to us like the same.”
“Yes, Dad! Remember! Remember everything! But, I don't know why despite remembering everything seems incomplete.”
“Incomplete…! But it can’t… Because, now there is love in your life. And where there is love, nothing remains incomplete even if it is incomplete.
Many things were incomplete yesterday. Today everything is complete. But, this is such a quest that has no end… Daughter…! There is no limit in the life that God has given us and..., in this life we can fill as much happiness as we want; uncountable... by adding little by little; from every little-little thing, from every little-little memory…”
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“Couldn't believe that, that day, Dad was saying all these things to me. Because, the life that Dad was praising that day, there was a day when Dad wanted to go far away from that life; used to hate so much that someone's laughing, singing, pleasuring seems poison to him. He had distanced himself from this love-filled world. "Love...” the word had no value for him. But, that day when I heard those words about life from his tongue, I was convinced that no matter how much we try to break the relationship with love, love doesn't leave us till our last breath. And on the other hand the other name of life is love too….
I thought friends would come in life for some special purpose. To help us fulfill that special purpose which we can’t fulfill alone, our destiny entrusts us with it. And… when all the needs are met, then... perhaps friendship won't remain so strong. But, I was wrong. Everything that fate has given us is very precious to us; forever. Happiness and sorrow will be found everywhere in life, but who we have to choose for our life depends entirely on us. The fulfillment of any one happiness in life doesn't end the reason for seeking happiness in life, nor does the need for those friends that fate has given us. I stopped playing the violin after everything in my life went right but, perhaps, fate didn’t want to let this happen. Because…, countless love was hidden in some part of that friendship. And I came to know about this when I started singing that song again…”
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A Jindegi… Maine tere liye…
Dil se ki hai dua…
Chaahe koi teraa
Saath de ya na de
Main saath dungi sadaa
Main saath dungi sadaa
[“A life… I have done this prayer for you with my heart…,
Whether someone gives you support or not,
I will always be with you,
I will always be with you…]
Tu kabhi to kehtaa nahin
Hai tujhko bhi kisiki kami
Bas detaa hai dil khol kar
Fikr khud ki tu kartaa nahin
[You never say that you lack someone,
Just gives with open heart without worrying about yourself;]
Par maine badhaaya hai haath
Dungi har pal teraa saath
Chaahe yeh waqt badal jaaye
Chaahe badal jaaye din aur raat
[But, I have extended my hand to will be with you every moment,
Whether, this time changes, whether, it changes day and night;]
A Jindegi… Maine tere liye…
Sajaaya hai ek Sapna
Chaahe tham jaaye yeh
Dhadkan meri
Pura karungi yeh saath
Pura karungi yeh saath
[O life… I have decorated a dream for you,
Even if my heart stops,
I will complete this accompaniment,
I will complete this accompaniment…]
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“Wow…! Really…! Is very nice...! I have seen many people in the world who care about themselves, care about their family or their close relatives but, care about life..., It’s really awesome... Frankly, this thinking can't be of everyone.”
“Thanks for the compliment Aunty...! But, I haven't thought about anything in it. I just sang whatever sound came out of my heart...”
“Came out of heart…!”
“Yeah…! When the path of life takes us at such a point where there is no one to walk with, at that time the heart is everything for us. Only can believe in it, only can aspire from it...!”
“You talk so cute-cute things...! What is your name, daughter?”
“Shruti…”
“Really…! Nice name…! Hmm…! Now, I can understand why the heart wants to hear something from you again and again. Do you come here every day…?”
“Hmm...! Everyday...!”
“So...can we meet at this same place tomorrow…?”
“Yes...! Why not...! By the way, tell me something about you too…!”
“I'm "J.J", Janhvi Joshi..., the singer…!”
“Oh no…!”
“Why…?! Can't be...?”
“No…! I mean, I have heard a lot of songs...and I am also one of your fans…
Suddenly I couldn't believe it. I was so lost in my life that I didn't even look at your face properly. I didn't expect that I'd ever meet you and that too in such a way and so easily… I'm so sorry…”
“It's ok daughter…!”
“Well, actually, you have come in such a simple way that suddenly no one will recognize you. And also there ain't no bodyguards around you…”
“Hmm...! Sometimes you have to step out of the world of appearances to familiarize yourself with real life. We can't run away from the truth. This is my reality as I look now. Absolutely simple and far from appearance.”
“Can I ask you something…?”
“Yeah ask…!”
“What's the reason for this loneliness…?”
“Loneliness…! Perhaps, it won't be so easy to explain about this for me but, I will try to explain to you… Because, after a long time someone has recognized this loneliness, asked about it... And sometimes... by telling some secrets hidden in the heart, the heart becomes lighter and answers of some complicated questions are also found…”
“Hmm…! You’re right…!”
“Ok...! Then, see you tomorrow; same time and same place, what say...?”
“Sure…! Bye…!”
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“My friends and those who knew me closely used to say that I play the violin very well. While touching its string, automatically it becomes something unique, something beautiful. This is all because I had made 'playing this Violin' a habit of my life.
Next…, the matter of my song then, I said it was the voice of my heart but, that voice is of my heart's joy or its pain that no one knew. Whenever a song used to come out of my lips, it always used to bring this question with itself: why is there so much pain in its words, why every time this song points to a story, about which, despite not knowing anything, seems familiar. And, fate answered it to me very differently; as a stranger.
That day, Janhvi Ma'am was absolutely right; “by telling some secrets hidden in the heart, the heart becomes lighter and answers of some complicated questions are also found…” My heart also wanted something similar…”
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“Papa…!!! Carefully…!”
“Sorry, brother! Accidentally collided... Actually, I'm in a little hurry, that's why…”
“It's Ok! No problem! Sometimes, it happens like this. I'm ok. You can go.
……………….
Hey daughter...! What are you looking like…?”
“I love you, Papa!”
“I love you too, my gudia…! But, suddenly so much love for your Dad... Why...? What’s the matter?”
“Nothing...! Just like that!
Dad! Do you remember a few days ago how you used to stay silent and lost minded…? There was always loneliness and anger on your face. You used to get irritated over small things. I was afraid to talk to you.”
“Yes daughter! Remember! Remember everything...! I had lost myself somewhere in this big world. Neither did I recognize myself nor did my life. I was an incomplete person…”
“Incomplete Person…?”
“Hmm…! A person who loses that precious incomplete part of his heart while walking in the path of life, is called an incomplete person. That one mistake of my life has proved that even if you appreciate anyone else or not, you should definitely appreciate that person who considers you more than his life. Whether or not you understand anything in life, but the desire of that person must be understood for whom only your love is a reason to live.
Only this was my fault. Despite everything being in front of my eyes, I couldn't understand anything and couldn't see anything and she…!
- Writer
