Unrealistic

8. Just the Two of Us

I feel my eyes widen.

“What else?”

“I’ve only talked about guys pleasuring girls,” he explains. “Girls can pleasure guys too.”

“How so?”

He touches my lips again and this time it sends the same shiver down my spine that I experienced last night, except it’s more intense.

“I wouldn’t suggest it without more experience, but a girl can use her mouth over her partner’s… excuse my bluntness… dick.”

I couldn’t hide my confusion. So he grabs my hand again.

“Now this is completely off scale, depending on the guy, but definitely for me,” he declares, “but say your finger was his… dick.”

He puts my finger in his mouth and slides it in and out. I nearly melt.

“Now don’t get me wrong, because like I said, I’m into girls, but i know it won’t be that easy. When you’re ready for that stuff, practice makes perfect.”

I nod with as much understanding as I can.

“If I’m not comfortable with something like that?” 

He nods with understanding.

“Not all girls are,” he says, “But you can just use your hands. Mine never fail me.”

I realize how much I just didn’t know so I resist asking for an explanation. He seems to be able to read my face though because he grabs my hand.

“This time, you’ll demonstrate because my fingers are bigger.”

I trust him by now not to take it too far so I oblige when he holds up my hand. This time he places his index in my palm and instructs me to close my hand over it. He holds my fist and turns it so his index becomes vertical.

“Now stroke it,” he instructs.

“Do what?” I try to ask with a straight face.

He can’t help but chuckle again as he gently holds my fist in his and moves it slowly up and down his index.

“See? You just do the same thing on your partner’s… you know.”

“And this is all oral?” I ask.

“Well when you use your tongue or your mouth it’s oral,” he expounds, “But when you use your hands or fingers on your partner, it’s usually foreplay or just mutual masturbation.”

“How do you know all this?”

“Lots of research on the web,” he says with a shrug, “Don’t ever look to porn though, I wouldn't want your innocent mind to be tainted with that.”

I’ve never watched porn but it seems like guys are always talking about watching it on shows. I have an idea of what it is but I’m surprised at Andy’s statement.

“Don’t all guys watch porn?” I ask, wondering if he would be honest.

“I have seen my fair share,” he says truthfully. “But it isn't like the real thing.”

I try to ignore the fact that he has experienced the real thing,  with other girls.

“Well thanks for explaining it all to me,” I say sincerely.

“Did you want to know because of research or because you actually want to try these things?”

That question shouldn’t have been a surprise but it took me off guard, regardless.

“Purely research,” I try to convince him… and myself.

“You know it’s natural for us to want s*x, right?”

“With the right person, sure” I say.

“The right person? As in you’re waiting for marriage?”

“Yes,” I solemnly say.

“So you don’t think you’ll have s*x until you’re married?”

“Yes. Why do you keep asking me that?”

“I just think it’s unrealistic, is all.”

“There’s nothing unrealistic about waiting,” I say at the onslaught of his statement. 

“Hey if that’s your thing,” he says with a shrug. “It’s no skin off my back.”

I gently push him back to add distance, his arrogance getting under my skin.

“Patrick is perfectly fine, waiting,” I retort.

“As in your boyfriend, Patrick?” he laughs indignantly. “I highly doubt your perfect Patrick isn’t wanking one out every day.”

“You said it’s normal,” I remind him. “Who cares? That doesn’t destroy his virtue.”

“I never said it did,” he countered. “So does that mean you’re open to the other stuff?”

I wish he would stop prying. I know I asked first, but this was getting personal.

“Why does it matter if I am or am not?”

“You were so quick to say you’re waiting” he says with an arrogant smile. “But you’re not quick to say you wouldn’t try everything we talked about?”

He laughs again and it’s annoying this time.

“Shut up Andy,” I can’t stand him now. “I wish I never asked you anything.”

I start to throw my things into my backpack.

“What are you doing?” he asks when he notices.

“What does it look like?” I snap at him. “I’m leaving.” 

“Oh come on, Syl,” he says stopping my hand from zipping up my bag. “Don’t get mad, I’m only teasing.”

I look into his eyes and even though I’m super heated, I can see he didn’t mean to offend me.

“If I stay, I’m only staying to do this stupid report,” I make my intentions clear.

“Well what’s a study sesh if we don’t actually hit the books?” he says with a less imperious smile. 

I normally would smile back but I am so emotionally spent I just crack open the book and start taking notes on the chapter about respiratory systems. Every now and then I would glance up and watch Andy take his own notes. It’s not that I’m not grateful to know more about intimacy, but I wish I wasn’t picturing what it might be like with... him.

 *          *          *

“Hey Patrick! I just need to grab my purse and I will be right there,” I say to him as I pass him in the foyer. I grab my purse I left on the coffee table. Mallory and Hector are in the living room killing time before they need to be at the theater. 

“Woah Syl!,” Mallory sings out, “That outfit is hot!”

“Thanks!” I say, twirling to show off my entire outfit.

I’m wearing a cropped red tee with some light blue flare jeans and black platforms.

“It’s not a little revealing?” Patrick asks, entering the room.

“Is it not okay?” I frown a little at his question. “You never specified what we were doing.”

“Well I thought we would grab dinner with the gang at church,” he began, “And then they wanted to play some mini golf after.”

“This is a group date?” I ask, trying not to sound disappointed. “With church friends?”

“Well yeah,” Patrick says. “We always hang out with them.”

“I know,” I said, trying even harder to hide my disappointment. “I just thought, this time, it would be just the two of us.”

“Sylvia, I can’t cancel with them,” he says firmly, “Do you still have my cardigan?”

“Yes?”

“You might want to go grab it,” he says. “It might be cold tonight.”

We live in the south so we don’t get too many chilly nights. Even if tonight was one of them, I know it’s not why he’s asking me to wear his cardigan. I don’t want to start anything in front of Mallory and Hector so I go to my room and grab the tan cardigan hanging off the desk chair.

“Got it.” I say waving it in front of him.

“Aren’t you going to put it on?” he suggests, or rather, he insists.

“Sure.” I say and put the cardigan on. It’s big so it covers most of my midriff.

“Here I’ll help you,” Patrick says as he starts to button the cardigan.

“I got it,” I say, a little embarrassed at his preemptiveness.

I look over at Mallory who is avoiding eye contact and pretending to be studying her nails.

“We’re going,” I announce.

She pretends to just notice us again.

“Oh! Have fun guys on your… er… date, thing,” she says awkwardly.

Hector bursts out laughing and she hits his arm to shush him. He clears his throat.

“Yeah… um… have fun!” he says without even looking at us.

“Thanks!” Patrick waves at them, completely oblivious to their sarcasm.

I roll my eyes and follow Patrick out.

This should be fun.

 *          *          *

We get to the restaurant and I haven’t said a word the whole ride. Not that I needed to because Patrick has been droning on about the electric guitar he saw at the music shop earlier. He plays with a borrowed one with the band at church and he’s been wanting one of his own.

“It’s black and white with ceramic pickups,” he says, still harping on the details I have very little interests in.

“Sounds nice,” I say.

“What’s wrong with you?” he asks as he parks the car.

“Nothing,” I lied. “Just hungry, I guess.”

“Well they’ve got your favorite tacos on special tonight,” he says to cheer me up. “I called ahead to ask.”

I feel bad for being in a bad mood.

“Thanks Patrick,” I smile. “That was really sweet of you.”

He smiles and gets out of the car to open the door for me.  He holds my hand and we walk together to the front of the restaurant when his phone rings.

“Hey! We just got here,” he says into the receiver. “We’re walking up now.”

I can hear the faint sound of a familiar voice through his phone.

“Okay we’re hurrying,” he says smiling really hard. “We’ll see you soon.”

“Who was that?” I ask, even though I’m pretty sure I know who it was.

“It’s just Marie,” he says with a shrug. “She’s just letting us know they’re sitting at a table in the back.”

Of course.

We make our way through the crowded restaurant and I spot the group of youth members we hang out with. There’s about eight of them and they are gathered around a couple of tables that have been pushed together to accommodate everyone. A few of them play in the band and the others either date someone in the band or they’re part of the group of girls like Marie, who heads every food and clothing drive done for the community.

“Hey gang!” Patrick greets everyone to a chorus of “hi’s” and “hello’s”.

I just wave. It’s not that I don’t like everyone, I do. I just expected to see them tomorrow.

“Hi Patrick… and Sylvia,” Marie says as we take the only empty seats, in front of her.

I match her fake smile and say “hi” back. She tucks back a strand of perfectly-parted straight black hair behind her ear to show off her silver hoop earrings. She is wearing a royal blue cardigan over a button down white shirt, buttoned all the way to the collar.

“So I took the liberty of ordering appetizers for everyone,” she announces. “If I recall the boneless chicken wings are a favorite.”

“I love their boneless chicken wings!” Patrick says excitedly. “Thanks Marie!”

I see her flash him a smile and wink. 

Seriously?

Not a moment sooner, they arrive and I don’t touch a single one of them.

“You don’t want any?” Patrick asks. 

“No I’m not that hungry,” I say back.

“I thought you were?” 

“I mean I’m not hungry for wings,” I try to specify. “I’m just waiting on my mahi-mahi tacos.”

“If you say so,” he says after eating another one.

We finally get our orders in, to which I tried not to kick Marie when she happened to order the same item as Patrick with, “I love their hamburgers.”

I was slowly losing my appetite as it gets replaced with annoyance. I haven’t forgotten that Marie was the one that told Patrick about Andy and it’s becoming increasingly obvious that she is trying to win his attention.

“So Sylvia, I heard you have a great singing voice,” Brian says from the far end of the table.

“The neighborhood dogs might not agree,” I joke to salvage my blushing from everyone’s sudden attention on me.

“That bad?” Marie says smiling.

She’s lucky I don’t need a knife to eat my tacos.

“Actually that good!,” Patrick says to which Marie’s face drops. “I’ve been telling the guys in the band that I hear you sing to the radio all the time.”

Now I’m really blushing.

“Well we need a replacement now that Susan is doing that outreach project in India,” Brian goes on, “Care to try out tomorrow?”

“Me?” I ask at the unexpected proposal.

“Sylvia you should!” Patrick says, “It would be great for both of us to be in the band.”

How can I say no?