Being Enamored By Him

Thunderstruck

Naina POV

Misunderstandings are like cancer in your relationship once it is there you cannot exude it from your relationship no matter how much dear it is to you.

After telling to Kia about me renting a new apartment I left to my new apartment. I unpacked everything and was just putting my clothes in my new closet. I was oblivious to everything that I was doing, I was way too stressed for tonight. I don't know why but thinking about tonight was making my heart pounding too wildly. Just to calm my racing heart I went to the kitchen and pour myself a glass of water. I felt way too relieved after gulping it down within seconds.

The moment I went again to my room I saw a shirt which was not mine it was Kabir's. This was the only thing that I took of his with me. I wanted something or just a reminder of him with me. Whenever I miss him terribly I wear his just which smelled of him. I feel at peace whenever I wear this shirt. It was his favorite shirt and I have a great significance in our life. He wore this shirt when we went to church that night. It was indeed an amazing night which beholds so many memories... to be very honest if you will ask me whether I regret marrying Kabir or not? My answer would definitely be no. I can never regret marrying him. I still feel blessed to be connected to him in a very special way. I know right now our relationship doesn't have that trust that we used to have but maybe we both need some time away from each other to understand the importance of our relationship in our life. In these past ten days, I haven't talked much to anyone over the phone. What surprised me the most was when Maa called me. I couldn't help but cry. I mean at one side there was my mother who was chiding me for everything and there was Kabir's mom who was making me understand how ethereal all relationships are. Not even for once she talked about me coming back to India or pressuring me to talk to Kabir. Nope, she didn't do anything. She told me about her relationship with Kabir's dad. That day when we talked I realized that my love for Kabir is unconditional and I can never love anyone the way I love Kabir.

Just the thought of her made me smile. My smile widened when I noticed Maa's name flashing on my phone. Fantastic!

"Hello," I said excitedly.

"Hey. You seem in a good mood" She said with an energetic voice.

"I am happy that you called me. I miss you Maa" I said sadly that i cannot go there and be with her.

"I miss you too Naina more than you know. But I cannot force you to come back nor I am going to. You both are at that point of a relationship when you have to sort out everything on your own. We cannot help you out." She said firmly.

"I know Maa and I am just taking my time. I hope soon everything will be fine. By the way Maa how is Kabir?" I asked with hesitation and bit my lip.

"I know and to be very honest I want you both to take your time. You sure wanna know about Kabir?" She asked making me nervous.

"Yes," I said and my heart was pounding too fast that all of a sudden I was all sweaty and wanted gallons of water.

"Kabir is not fine. He just blames himself for what he did. I have never seen him this sad. As a mother, I know how much in pain he is. When we found him he was a mess. His eyes were bloodshot red. All your house was in a mess. And what I did was worst any mother could do to her child. I slapped him. I just know one thing Naina he really loves you and whatever happened was not his mistake. I also understand that he should have told you about Avantika but he didn't whose consequences you both are suffering from" she said and her voice cracked at the end.

Last time when we talked I couldn't bring myself to ask about Kabir now that I have I was feeling like the worst person on this earth. I know I did the stupidest thing by leaving Kabir without any reason. I wasn't circumspect enough! I was really feeling pathetic and more than anything I just wanted to do one thing right now is call Kabir and say sorry to him but I can't. And I don't think he will ever forgive me for how I reacted.

I must have been silent for a certain amount of time as I was pulled back from my thoughts by maa calling my name repeatedly.

"Uhuhh" I muttered still baffled.

"Naina are you alright?" She asked me with concern.

"Yes, Maa. I am really sorry for what I did. Now I am realising what I did was so immature! I shouldn't have reacted that way." I was holding my teddy bear tightly in my lap and was crying inaudabily so that maa doesn't know that I was crying.

"Naina you both reacted immature.. You both have a long way to go beta and one thing that you both need to understand is never give up no matter how serious your problem is! At the end it is you who have to stand up and face it" she said firmly.

"Maa I don't know what I should do now! I am confused, I am hurt, and now I don't even know what I want" I said to her wiping my tears.

"Give it some time. You will both realise your mistakes and soon everything will be fine. Time heals everything Naina" she said as if to make me understand the true meaning of relationships. With that, we both bid each other our goodbyes and I was left to my thoughts. How messed up everything has become in these last 10 days of my life! Actually terrible days of my life.

While talking to maa time just flew and It was already 7 in the evening that means I just have one hour before Kia comes. Honestly, I don't wanna go there but I can't do anything now!

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As expected Kia was very punctual. She and Vedh were at my doorstep exactly at 8. Firstly Kia inspected my house and gave me a look which said she didn't like it much. Well, I can understand that as I took this house in a hurry but still it is not that bad. After that, we went straight to a club called Fifty's which was not too far from my house. I was lost in my thoughts about how should I tell Kabir how much regret I was feeling over what I did. What surprised me the most was both Kia and Vedh didn't try to strike a conversation with me for which ofcourse I was grateful for but something isn't right like Kia didn't comment on how I was looking and to be very honest looking at my attire nobody can tell I am going to a bar! I was wearing a crop top with blue color jeans and a black leather jacket with my hair pulled in a messy bun. At last, we reached the club, now I was feeling really awkward. I don't have any idea how I managed to go with Avinash and from where I got that courage.

"Relax Naina. It's just a club don't overthink" Kia said rolling her eyes and vedh chuckled.

"Yeah" I frowned and followed both of them inside the club which was as usual overcrowded and lights were dim.

People were sweating profusely, some couples or strangers were making out in the corner, people were grinding their bodies to each other. Music was on the top of the volume. Exactly what I expected and my head was already moving because of the loud music.

"What would you like to have?" Vedh shouted.

"Nothing much just a virgin mojito" I shouted back. I am in no condition to ask for alcohol. I am satisfied with my choice of the drink also I don't trust myself what I will do if I get drunk, so a big no to alcohol.

After that, I and Kia were left together but Kia wasn't there mentally she was checking her phone repeatedly and wandering her eyes here and there. I was about to ask her what the matter was but before I could ask her Vedh came back with our drinks. I gulped my drink within minutes. Yeah, I was thirsty.

"Come on let's dance" Kia dragged me to the dance floor.

"No Kia. I can't my head Is aching like hell" I shouted but she ignored my protest and dragged me to the floor but me being me the moment I got a chance I got out from that place and saw Kia dancing with Vedh. They looked too happy together too cute. I smiled thinking about how grateful they are for having each other with this walked out of that bar.

My headache worsened as I forgot to take my evening medicines today. I was walking aimlessly hugging my jacket when I heard a voice. A familiar voice!

I turned to look at the source of that voice and was thunderstruck. I froze and now my head was spinning. It was Kabir who was now running towards me, I don't know whether he was really there or I was hallucinatiKabirbir, I wasn't able to look straight. I was losing control, my legs were giving up, my vision got blurred and before I could do anything I lost every ounce of strength that my body had and fainted........