Taming The Spy Alpha (18+)

Chapter 32—Unending Battle

(Snow's POV)

"Everything is going to be alright and you know that I am here already together with you right? Just trust the process altogether, I know that you are suffering this days and I know that you needed me a lot. I am very sorry if I am not there to handle the frustrations that you are feeling sometimes specially when I am busy, but I am sure that you know it already that I am always happy that you are here with me and that you are always going to make me feel happier than ever, " he said.

"Of course Sebastian, I just feel like I am low and I feel like I am very much of a failure this days. There's things that I needed to do and I just wanted to see you a lot. I know that you are busy with your school works lately, but you still gave me time to hang out with me and to make me feel that I am not lonely, that you are here with me no matter what and that you will never leave me alone no matter what. That is something that I will always treasure because you never failed to show me how much you love me, never failed to show me how much I mean to you and you are always there when I needed you the most especially in the times that I am very doubtful with myself. It is not really that easy to make decisions for myself too bad here you are, you are making me feel that I am too lucky for having you. You know it already Sebastian, I will never be the person that I wanted to be sometimes because I feel like I am always been screwed up. I feel like this is something that I should suffer about because sometimes I feel like there's no progress in my life and I know that it is very alarming as well, " I said.

He is always there when I needed him the most and he takes care of my mental health as much as possible because he know that I am suffering with my own worst and my value of thinking, I am sometimes taking him for granted but he never have a reaction with that, he was always been kind to me and he never really makes me feel insecure about anything because he will always tell me that I am beautiful. The man that will always make you feel in love with him no matter what you do is literally him, he is not the boy with me because he knows that I love them, but little did he know about that, about this feelings that I am having right now that I am very willing to break up with him already, I also don't want to suffer with myself and this is something that will also concern him if he knows that.

Sebastian often makes me feel that I am the woman that he wanted to marry, keyboard always mention it together with me . He is very willing to marry me soon as much as possible. Even if our relationship is a level of something that is not yet confirmed towards the others, he is here with me to stand up with that.

Our relationship together I'd quite cliche, I sometimes think that I should not worry about it at all, I don't know if I will have the urge to make myself feel that all of this is just fine, because it is not anymore, I feel like it was a burden as well.

"Why did you even marry me, Sebastian? I know that when I asked you to marry me before, I know that you are very uncomfortable with my question, but either way, you did it. What makes you think that made you decide that you should agree with me? I am a little bit anxious because I don't want you to feel that I am not having all of it, I just wanted to know what's going on with it and stuff like that, it's not really that bad at all is it?" I asked.

"It's because I have no other choice, I need to feel loved too and that's why I agreed," he said.