Idols

Chapter 7

Back in Korea and back to the hectic reality, my Adonis dove fully into rehearsals. I resumed work, and two whirlwind weeks flew by. The day came for the group to depart for South America, followed by United States, where I would join them three weeks later. The U.S. was a two-week tour.

We arrived in the United States together with Jin, as she wanted to do the same upon hearing my plans. In the U.S., we did sightsee, shopping, attended their shows, and I worked remotely for only a couple of hours a day, mostly to respond to emails and handle administrative tasks. Due to the time difference, I couldn't attend meetings, so that part of the tour was quite easy for me.

After the U.S., we moved on to Europe, where we repeated the same pattern. However, since there was a smaller time difference, I could attend some important meetings.

On the last day in Paris, we went for a ride along the Seine River, after visiting the Eiffel Tower. The boat was exclusively for the group and the staff. It was a wonderful experience. I sat at the same table with them, and everyone, tried to make me feel comfortable. They spoke in English as much as they could, and I tried to speak in Korean to show that I was also trying to integrate. After dinner, we moved away from the rest and went to the edge of the boat to see the city lights and enjoy the ride. He asked me if I was happy, I looked at him and said yes., then returned the question, and you, are you happy? He told me he would answer that question with another question.

He asked me to close my eyes and only open them when he said. I did it and waited. After a few seconds, he said I could open my eyes. When I opened them, I saw him on one knee in front of me with a ring in his hand. I was nearly in shock and couldn't believe what was happening. I didn't say anything, waiting for him to say what I wanted to hear.

Meeting you has been the best thing that has happened to me. Our first encounter was the beginning of something different, something I had never experienced before. I knew you would leave a deep impact on me, and I wasn’t mistaken. I deeply regret all the pain I put you through. I didn’t want to acknowledge how important you were to me until you were gone and disappeared without a trace. and those months were the worst of my life, but you came back to me, and I promised myself I wouldn’t lose you again. These months that you’ve been by my side made me long for, things I never thought I would, like having a family, having children. In all my plans, you are there, and I can no longer conceive my life without you. Would you be part of my future, my wife, the mother of my children? Would you marry me?

At that moment, all I could do was breathe, cry, and think about how lucky I was. I knelt beside him and said yes, a thousand times yes. I kissed him and hugged him. After that, he put a wonderful diamond ring on my finger, and we embraced. Suddenly, we were lifted and hugged. I realized that everyone on the boat was watching eagerly. As soon as I said yes, they rushed to lift us up, celebrating with us.

When Jin hugged me, we cried together, and she told me she had helped Joonie choose the ring. They had been planning this since we returned from our vacation in Chile. Why did he take so long to propose? I asked. She told me that he wanted it to be special and since everyone thinks Paris is very romantic, he chose that city for the proposal. When he told the members of the group, they all joined in the preparations. I even found out that the moment had been recorded for posterity.

I was overflowing with happiness and immediately made a video call to my parents and siblings. They were thrilled with the news, and we agreed to talk the next day to share details. After the ride on the Seine, we took a short walk around the area. We held hands and reminisced about all the moments we had shared. Two bodyguards followed us closely but gave us enough space to get the intimacy that the moment required.

We finished the European tour at the end of May and returned to Korea for a two-month break before continuing tour in Asia and Oceania, which would end in late August.

We decided to get married in July during the tour break, although there were still rehearsals and commitments. We went to Busan to meet Joonie's family, who already knew about me and had approved our relationship. They were a close-knit family who always supported and respected their son’s decisions.

We agreed to have a very intimate ceremony. I was afraid of media exposure, and Joonie also didn't like the idea of exposing our relationship to the public eye. The fewer people who knew, the better.

The wedding took place on July 25th in a hotel ballroom, where my family and close friends stayed. Everyone traveled to be present at the only ceremony and celebration we would have. My friends traveled as well and of course, Sebastian did too, even though Joonie had initially refused to invite him. From my company, I only invited my Latina friend, who knew most of our story, and my boss, whom I made promise not to tell anyone. Otherwise, the secret wouldn’t be a secret anymore, and the next day, all Korea would know.

On Joonie's side, his family, the bandmates with their girlfriends, some of the parents of the members who all knew each other and were close, and part of their close team along with some agency staff were present.

We wanted something very intimate, but even so, there were about sixty people at the ceremony and celebration.

I didn't wear a traditional bridal gown. That was never my dream. I’ve always wanted to start a family and have children, but the dress and all that, didn’t matter to me as much anymore. Nevertheless, I bought a beautiful ivory-colored lace dress that went down to my knees, resembling a jumper. It had a pale pink ribbon at the waist that matched my tiara. I got the dress at Carolina Herrera, a luxury store and it cost me a fortune. But I couldn’t say no, as I faced pressure from my sisters, friends, and Jin. They told me that I had to live up the occasion, my fiancé was a millionaire, and I had to take care of all the details. I resisted, saying that no one would find out and that it didn't matter. But they didn't listen, and I had to give in to the pressure. In any case, the dress was worth it, it was beautiful with luxurious finishing touches, and it fit me perfectly.

After the ceremony, we had a dinner, and many guests left after it. My family, Joonie's family and our closest friends went to the hotel's presidential suite, where we had a small party to celebrate. It mainly involved music and drinks; we did karaoke and danced until two in the morning. After that, we went to Joonie's apartment, where we had our wedding night. The next day, we left for the Maldives for our honeymoon. It would only be five days, as the second part of the tour began in mid-August, and there was no time for more rest.

My family and friends took the opportunity to explore Seoul and would return to Chile the same week, as commitments and work didn’t allow a longer stay.

We were on our second day of honeymoon, when our phones started ringing. Joonie answered his and began speaking with someone from the agency, while I answered mine, it was Jin. She told me not to be alarmed, but we were trending topic.

A photo of us walking hand in hand through Paris was circulating on the internet, and everyone was speculating about the identity of the woman with Joonie. Many hypotheses were considered, some absurd and even amusing. It was clear that the woman wasn’t Korean or Asian, as could be seen in the photo, but my face wasn’t clearly visible since it was nighttime, and the photo was taken from a distance – we hadn’t noticed it being taken. Probably within just a few days, the identity of the mysterious woman would be revealed, and a few more days after that, news of our marriage would become known.

Joonie spoke with the agency for quite some time, apparently, it was the CEO, and they were deliberating which course of action to take. They had prepared various scenarios and options, as the truth would eventually come out. In all of them, the idea was to expose me as little as possible. Our situation was quite different from Jin's marriage to Bo Hin. They had been in a relationship for years; she was Korean, and she was already beloved and accepted by fans and the Korean public. Their relationship was respected. In contrast, I wasn’t Korean, I was older than Joonie, he was one of the most popular members of the band, our relationship was still relatively new and kept secret, and on top of it all, we had married in secret.

When Joonie ended the call, he approached me and confirmed what Jin had informed me. He said that the agency would release an official statement confirming our relationship. It didn’t make sense to hide anything, as journalists would investigate and uncover everything eventually.

I nearly had a panic attack, realizing that I was about to be thrust into the public eye. Koreans could be incredibly harsh and direct in their criticism and opinions, and I was worried about the criticism that Joonie might face. He was the famous one, the target of most criticism.

But what scared me the most, wasn’t being followed or questioned by journalists; it was the obsessive and sometimes dangerous behavior of fans. I worried about my own safety.

Joonie reassured me, saying that after our honeymoon and before the start of the Asia tour, he would hold a press conference and ask for respect and understanding for me. I asked the agency to handle my family and ensure that they could leave Korea before the official announcement to avoid unnecessary scrutiny.

I contacted my family and explained the situation, and they agreed to return to Chile the following day, just before the announcement became official.

We also cut our honeymoon short and arrived in Korea early that morning to avoid crowds. The airport was relatively empty, and people didn’t recognize us. The agency had taken care of moving my personal belongings and clothes from my apartment so that I wouldn't have to go there and risk exposure. I wouldn’t live there again but had the apartment for my family or friends when they visited Korea. Just before noon, Jin arrived to support us and to be with me when the announcement was made.

I called my boss to inform him and make sure he was prepared. He assured me that the company wouldn’t get involved and wouldn’t allow journalists or fans into their premises. We agreed that I wouldn't go to the office and would work remotely until it was safe for me to return.

The official statement was released at exactly noon, and immediately comments and discussions flooded social media platforms and Korean television shows.

The statement didn’t reveal my name; it simply stated that the woman in question was Latin American, had been living in Korea for a long time due to work reasons, and that they had no further information to provide as it was part of the artist's private life, and he would be responsible for sharing more details. The statement requested respect for the couple’s privacy.

I felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I had been so afraid of this moment, and now I felt relieved. I only hoped that those close to us wouldn’t be hounded for information and that rumors wouldn’t spiral out of control. But that wasn’t something I could control.

I let out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding and realized that my relatively quiet life in the past had been a blessing. I had been a good daughter, a good student, and I had nothing to be ashamed of in my life both in Chile and in Korea. In some moments, I had regretted being so structured and cautious in my actions, but now it had served me well, just in case someone wanted to dig into my past.

Joonie told me he knew that, and that's why he was so calm. His statement surprised me, and I asked why he was so sure. He said the agency had thoroughly investigated me after I returned to Korea, and he mentioned that he wanted to have a serious relationship with me. They needed to ensure I had a clean record and was suitable to be by his side, as any scandal or inappropriate behavior could be harmful to him and the group.

They were mostly looking for legal issues, criminal records, drugs, prostitution, divorce – actions that would be heavily judged in Korea. They hadn’t found anything like that and found my education, postgraduate degrees, job capabilities and economic stability, as well as that of my family. They had been approved too. I exhaled and wasn't surprised by what I heard.

The following days were more of the same, we were trending on many programs, and colleagues, neighbors and even people I didn't know were being interviewed about us. For the sake of my mental health, I decided not to turn on the TV and not listen to anything.

The following week, my husband also issued an official public statement, confirming our relationship and marriage.

He asked for respect, especially for me, as I wasn’t a famous person, not connected to the music or entertainment industry. He stated that I was an ordinary person working in a company, not accustomed to media exposure. He announced he wouldn’t make more statements of that kind and that the group was focusing on the second part of the world tour starting in a week, and he provided details about the tour and the group’s activities.

After the storm, the sun came out, and things calmed down as they started the tour in Asia and Australia. They returned to Korea in the second-to-last week of August, just in time for two concerts there. One in Busan and one in Seoul, concluding the tour.

To the Seoul concert, Jin and I ventured to accompany them. I knew this would be the ultimate test for me, as during that month I had worked remotely and not gone anywhere, staying confined to our apartment. On the day of the concert, a SUV picked up Jin from her apartment, then came for me. It took us straight to the Seoul Olympic Stadium.

This time we weren’t backstage, and we weren’t in the front row – that would have been risky. Instead, we were in a private box, where VIPs, other Idols, and celebrities seeking privacy and security were typically located.

Families of some members, girlfriends and the group’s closest circle were also there. Of course, Hyun, the annoying one arrived with a member's girlfriend, and they sat down without even glancing at us.

At that moment, my position was vastly different from what it was when I endured that awkward experience with her more than a year ago. Now, I was the wife, not just another friend. My empowerment was triumphant, and even though it felt like a bit childish, I walked up to them to say hello. Jin followed suit. When I greeted them, I made sure to prominently display my hand, so that she could see my engagement and wedding ring.

She saw them and only managed to congratulate me for having “catching" him. I replied with a smirk, “Exactly. Now that he’s officially mine, I don't want you near him. Otherwise, you will regret it.” Jin heard the comment and looked at me in astonishment, then took me by the arm and said, “let's sit down; the concert is about to start, and we walked away, laughing at my audacity.

With the tour finished and more time for ourselves, I decided to resign from my job. It had become increasingly difficult for me to work, as there was always someone wanting to ask questions about the group, seeking exclusives, news, or gossip. It was affecting my relationship with my coworkers. There was always also someone trying to take a photo when went out to eat or simply went outside.

Jin and I had a plan that we were going to share with the members during the closing dinner that night. Our plan involved creating a foundation named after the group. Its main objectives would be charitable donations, scholarships, social assistance for women and children, and support for youth, particularly focused on mental health. The rates of youth suicide in Korea were alarmingly high due to immense societal pressure they faced.

We spent a lot of time working and planning foundation’s launch, outlining the advantages of creating an independent entity legally, financially, and administratively separate from the agency. With my background in international law and postgraduate studios in economics and finance, along with Jin’s expertise in political science and foundations’ relationship with governmental and fiscal bodies, we believed we had covered all the bases. We had an action plan that we presented that night.

Everyone was taken aback by our proposal, especially Joonie and Bo Hin, who had no idea about our plan. Nonetheless, everyone loved the idea including the CEO of the agency who was present at the dinner, alongside other executives. We received unanimous approval to start working on it and we did.

Three months later, after many meetings and recruiting efforts, the foundation bearing the group’s name was established, and we could hold its inauguration, attended by many people from all walks of life in Korea. The group’s members attended this official event, which featured speeches, photos, and a dinner.

After the celebration, Joonie and I left together in a SUV. On the way, he told me how proud he was of me and how much he loved the idea of me working for his group.

He kissed me and held me tight, then told me about an idea that had been on his mind for a while.

- I want to be a dad. I want us to have a child, are you okay with that?

I hugged and kissed him, saying yes, that my dream was to have a family with children, but I didn't want to pressure him, which is why I hadn't talked about it yet.

We decided to start trying that same night. We began discussing and planning our future together with children, when suddenly, I saw a blinding light and heard a deafening sound. Within seconds, I felt a jolt, and everything went blurry and then black.