Beneath The Act

Ryder Murray

Ryder Murray

I’ve seen a lot of messed up things.

Drunken fights in gas station parking lots. My dad getting thrown out of bars. My mom packing up her bags one night and never coming back. You grow up like that, you learn to build walls early. You learn that feelings are weapons, and if you let anyone see yours—they’ll use them against you.

But I wasn’t prepared for her.

I wasn’t prepared for Kailee Bennett storming into my life with her hoodie armor and eyes that saw straight through my sarcasm. I wasn’t prepared for the sound of her crying in that bathroom—the way it gutted me like a knife between the ribs. I wasn’t prepared to feel anything at all.

But I did.

And now I couldn’t stop.

She looked at me like I was the villain in her story. And maybe I was. Maybe I didn’t deserve her trust. But watching her break down like that—watching her shove me away like I was the reason she bled—it did something to me.

I hadn’t smoked since.

The cigarette behind my ear was a ghost I hadn’t lit.

I slammed my locker shut and stalked across the hallway, ignoring the stares and whispers. People always stared. That was the thing about being me—when your reputation arrives before you do, people get out of your way.

Except today, I didn’t want them to move. I wanted them to hurt.

I found them behind the gym.

Noah’s little group of hyenas. The same assholes who laughed while Kailee was trying to keep her s**t together. The ones who made her feel like garbage just for trying.

“Yo, Ryder,” one of them called, grinning like we were boys. “You see that meltdown fatfuck had? Cringe city, bro.”

I didn’t respond. Just walked up, slow, calm.

Then I punched him straight in the mouth.

Hard.

He dropped like a sack of rocks, blood gushing from his nose.

The others backed up, stunned.

“What the hell, man?!”

“Say one more word about her,” I said, voice cold. “One more joke. One more laugh. And I promise, you won’t be able to chew solid food for a week.”

“You’ve lost your damn mind,” Noah said, stepping forward.

“No,” I snapped. He’d be in the same condition if not that Kailee actually likes this piece of garbage.

I dragged by the clear despite his struggles.

“Unhand me man” he grabbed my wrist struggling but it was if no use.

“Now you listen to me good. You’re going to apologize to her and make your boys apologize as well and if I ever hear even one fat joke about her, I’ll be back abd this time we might discuss in a civilized manner” I warned

I could see he was frightened by the fury in my eyes. Good.

I pushed him out of my grip and arranged my jacket

The silence that followed was loud. Uncomfortable.

And deserved.

I walked away before I did something worse. My fists were still shaking.

I skipped class. Wandered the campus. Found the back bleachers and sat alone, letting the wind cool my rage.

I hated this. Hated that she was under my skin. Hated that every time I closed my eyes, I saw hers—red and furious, soaked with betrayal.

She thought I did it to hurt her.

But I never wanted to hurt her.

Hell, I didn’t want to feel anything at all.

I pulled my hoodie over my head and stared at the ground. My mom used to say that guilt was just proof that you still had a soul. I used to think mine was long gone. Turns out, Kailee Bennett dragged it back out, kicking and screaming.

I didn’t know how to fix things with her. Maybe I couldn’t.

But I could make sure no one ever made her feel like that again.

Ever.

Even if she never looked at me again—

I was still going to protect her.

And if that meant playing the villain for a while longer—

Then so be it.

The sun was going down and I was still at the bleachers. I had no interest in going home or going anywhere. I didn’t even want to drink.

My mind kept drifting to Kailee and each time my head replayed the hurt in her eyes that day in the bathroom, it just chirped away another piece of my soul

What is wrong with me??

Am I suddenly a protective step brother??

“Ryder??”

A soft voice drew me out my thoughts and I looks up to see Kailee.

Standing at the base of the bleachers in her usual hoodie, arms crossed tightly—but her eyes flicked downward. Just once. And then she immediately looked away.

Was she blushing?

I didn’t move. Just stared. “You stalking me now, Bennett?”

She rolled her eyes and played with the strings of her hoodie. “Not to boost your already over inflated ego but I need yoke help.” She muttered softly and my interest piqued

I blinked.

Okay.

So this was happening.

Kailee Bennett—Miss I-Hate-Your-Guts—was standing in front of me asking for my help.

My brain short-circuited for half a second. Did she just say she needed me?

My lips twitched. I leaned back on my elbows, pretending like my insides weren’t throwing a damn party.

“Say that again?” I said, arching a brow. “Slower this time. I wanna savor it.”

She groaned. “God, never mind—”

“Relax.” I smirked. “I’m listening.”

She shifted from foot to foot, clearly uncomfortable. “I was going to give the role back, okay? I was. But then Sienna showed up and said all this crap about how I’d never last and—ugh—I just snapped. I couldn’t let her win. So I kept it.”

A small smile tugged at the corner of my mouth. Damn right she did.

She rubbed her hands together nervously. “And… after rehearsal, Ms. Langston said we’re practicing the kissing scene next. Like… soon.”

I stilled.

She cleared her throat and looked at her shoes. “I’ve never… I haven’t… y’know.”

Ah.

Oh.

Oh.

She hasn’t kissed anyone? God, she was so innocent

It was… kind of adorable.

I bit back a grin.

“And I don’t want my first kiss with my crush to be completely inexperienced,” she added quickly. “Or worse—be terrible. I don’t want people to say I kiss like a dying fish or something.”

She peeked up at me. “So I need help. Confidence. Practice. Lines. All of it.”

I leaned forward slowly, eyes on hers. “You want me to teach you how to kiss?”

“Not in a creepy way!” she snapped. “Just… help me not suck at it. Give me tips or something”

I couldn’t help it—I laughed.

Her eyes narrowed. “I knew you’d mock me.”

“Hey, I’m not mocking,” I said, raising my hands. “I’m just impressed. Princess finally begs.”

Her cheeks turned crimson. “Forget it. This was a mistake—”

“Okay, okay,” I cut in, standing. “I’ll help.”

She froze. “Seriously?”

“But,” I added, stepping closer, “you still owe me.”

She eyed me warily. “Owe you how?”

“I need Sienna jealous. You help with that, I help with this. Deal?”

Kailee crossed her arms. “Fine. But no change in wardrobe. No tight tops. No skirts that ride up to my ribs. I’m not playing Barbie.”

I smirked. “That’s what’s stopping you from being Barbie?”

Her jaw dropped. “Ryder!”

“Kidding..”

But before I could say another word, I spotted Sienna walking by at the edge of the field, her eyes already narrowing at the two of us standing way too close.

Perfect.

“Come here,” I said, grabbing Kailee’s wrist and pulling her down onto the bleachers beside me.

“What the hell are you doing—?”

She tripped over the step and fell—right into my lap.

I caught her waist, one hand sliding to the small of her back without even thinking.

She froze.

I looked up at her.

She was close. Too close.

Her lips were inches from mine. Her breathing shallow. Her hoodie collar was wrinkled from the fall, and her hair brushed my cheek.

Her lips looked too soft to ignore. Because I wanted to know if she tasted like fire or sugar—or both.

I slid my hand up and gently tilted her chin.

Her eyes didn’t move.

She didn’t pull back.

And Sienna?

Sienna was definitely still watching.

But in that second—I wasn’t doing this for her anymore.

I was doing it for me.

“Lesson one,” I murmured, my voice low. “Keep eye contact”