My Healthy obsession

The silence

CHAPTER TWO

The apartment felt very empty after he left, like you could hear a pin drop. I stood where I was for a while, just starring at the pots like they could give me the answers to the many questions raving through my mind. Smoke still curled toward the ceiling. The smell of burnt food still clung to the atmosphere. I couldn't continue to stand. eventually, I walked away from the kitchen and pulled out a chair at the dinning table and sat down. Maybe being away from there would ease the discomfort I felt.

I don't know how long I've sat here in silence, maybe long enough for the smoke to thin and the apartment to smell stale rather than burnt food. I blinked and looked around me almost like I was seeing the dinning for the first time, I looked across from here, everything remained the same way I had left them maybe minutes, an hour ago?... I can't remember but I needed to clean up. I let out a slow breath and pushed myself to my feet, I scraped the burnt food into the bin, filled the pot with water and left it to soak. The dishes didn't take long after that, by the time I was done, I opened every window in the apartment so the evening breeze would finally find its way inside, better.

As I reached into the cupboard for a clean dish towel, my fingers brushed against a stack of measuring cups tucked behind a mixing bowl. I paused, I hadn't used them in weeks or maybe months, I can't remember, I'm not sure I remember much lately. I closed the cupboard, maybe another day, something i've learned to say to myself most of the time now. Once everything was dry and back where they belonged, I turned off the kitchen light and headed for the stairs, resting my hand against the railing as I climbed, by the time I reached the top, my legs felt heavier than they should have, maybe I felt tired I needed to rest.

I pushed open the bedroom door, everything was exactly the way I left it, the bed was laid, the lavender candle sitting on my bedside table had long since burned itself into a little pool of wax. I grabbed a towel and a change of clothes and made my way to the bathroom. After a nice and warm evening bath that washed all discomfort I felt earlier, I dried myself, changed into my favorite polka dot pj's and tossed myself into bed. Lately I couldn't sleep without music, so I reached for my earphones, pressed play on the first playlist that came up and closed my eyes.

...

It was completely dark by the time I opened my eyes. I was too tired to get up from bed but I noticed the other side of the bed was empty. I reached for my phone, 9:47pm, I frowned, he still wasn't home.

I starred at his name on my screen for a moment before pressing call. It rang once, then twice, "hello?" his voice came through, steady , almost cheerful.

"Hey babe."

"Hey" there was a pause. "You okay?"

"I'm good" I shifted against the headboard "you're not home yet?"

"No, I'm out with the guys. we're playing games just catching up" I hear laughter in the background followed by someone saying something I couldn't quite make out. "Oh..ok." "don't wait up for me I won't be coming back tonight." The words landed quietly as expected. "Okay."

“I'll see you tomorrow. i'm on the phone.." he whisper-shouted. "Alright"

"take care of yourself" and the line went dead before I could offer another response.

I lowered the phone and placed it beside me, I couldn't go back to sleep so I picked up a book by my bedside , I kept flipping through pages the words just wouldn't stay in my head. I smiled to myself, closed it, tucked the duvet beneath my chin and slipped the earphones back in. Sleep came a little while later.