Everything She Never Wanted

Chapter 10

10

Henry walked back home less than happy with his cousins. Andie was a little more forgiving than Zach, but he wasn’t the least bit surprised by that. Ever since she and Cody got together, Andie was as soft as an overripe grape.

He wasn’t expecting to be ganged up on though. Instead of getting a relaxing breakfast, he was annoyed and frustrated. He hated when people told him things he didn’t want to hear. Especially when it had to do with Cynthia.

Thank God for Nonna who kept some of the peace.

At home, Henry jumped in the shower so he was ready when Cynthia arrived. He had no idea what she had in mind, other than lunch, and he wanted to make sure she wasn’t ready to run the minute she walked in the door. He noticed her sniffing him more than once. He was going to make damn sure he smelled good for her.

He stretched out on the couch, growing hard when he thought about the last time she was over and the way they made use of the couch. He considered a trip to the bathroom to take the edge off before she arrived, but he was running out of time. Instead, he grabbed his jacket and decided his time would be better spent shoveling the walkway so she didn’t end up on her a*s before he got her inside.

The crunch of tires on the packed snow told him she was there. The walk was almost clear. His nose was cold, but the rest of him was good. He wore an old sweatshirt and a pair of gloves knowing he’d sweat if he had too many layers on. There were much better ways to work up a sweat with a beautiful woman than shoveling.

Henry tossed the last shovelful of snow to the side and turned to watch Cynthia climb from her car. Her short, jeans-clad legs emerged first, boots dangling above the snow, before she plopped out of her SUV. Her red coat made her cheeks look even darker, especially when she looked up and saw him watching her. She reached back into the vehicle, giving him a hell of a view of her a*s. He wanted to offer to help her, but the view was too damn good to pass up. When she straightened, a large bag was in her hands.

“I brought lunch,” she said, crossing to where he stood.

Henry had a few ideas about what he wanted to eat.

He shook his head and smiled at her. He needed to get his head out of her pants. If he was going to make her want to stay, he needed to show her there was more to them than s*x.

Although s*x was the only thing that had changed in their relationship…

“Sounds great,” he said, reaching for the bag.

Inside, Henry set the bag on the counter and stripped out of his cold clothes. He hung up his gloves and sweatshirt and toed off his boots, leaving them on the tray by the door. He took Cynthia’s jacket from her and hung it beside his, hating that he wanted to see it there every day.

He was definitely turning into a lovesick puppy.

“What did you bring for us?” Henry asked finally, his stomach telling him it was time to eat again.

Cynthia didn’t say anything as he went to the bag. He pulled out container after container, all closed with no marks on them. He flipped the top open on one and grinned.

“Really? Chili cheese fries?”

She laughed. Damn. Her laugh made him want to get her n***d.

“We always loved these when we were in high school. There are so many places I avoided when I got home because… um… I just didn’t want to go.”

“You didn’t want to run into me,” he supplied, knowing that’s where she was going.

She had the decency to look ashamed.

“Well, you sacrificed for nothing. I haven’t been to All Beef in years.”

Cynthia shook her head. “I don’t know how you stay away from food like this. It’s so good. Of course, if I want to lose weight I should stay away from food like this. Maybe I should be asking what your secret is.”

Henry grinned and shrugged. “Curves are a hell of a lot hotter on a woman than on a man.”

Cynthia wrinkled her nose. “I could stand to lose at least thirty pounds.”

Henry shook his head. “Not a chance. I like your curves. A woman should be soft.”

“Well, if I keep eating like this, I’ll get even softer.”

“Fine by me,” Henry said honestly. He always thought she was too thin growing up. Not that she was tiny, but he liked women that had more than enough curves. A woman he could sink in to and lose himself in.

And not just during s*x.

They ate their burgers standing at the kitchen counter. Henry figured he should invite her to sit, but he was so hungry he could barely think past the food in front of him. Cynthia didn’t seem to mind as she tucked in to her own burger.

When they were done, Cynthia rubbed her belly. “I ate too much.”

“Hard not to with this food. I forgot how good this was.”

“Uh oh. Did I screw up?”

Henry laughed and shook his head. “No. It’s fine. I’ll have to go for an extra run, but it’s fine.”

“Are you one of those guys who’s obsessed about his looks now?”

Henry shook his head. “No. But I won’t tell you I wish I was still fat.”

“You weren’t fat,” Cynthia argued.

Henry raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, fine. You weren’t thin. But you were such a great guy.”

Henry snorted. “Don’t give me that ‘you had a great personality’ s**t. I know that’s code for butt-ugly.”

“You were never ugly.”

“Maybe. But I wasn’t ‘Best Looking’ either.”

He knew by the blush on her cheeks that she was thinking about Easton Keen. Easton was the guy Cynthia lost her virginity to, the guy she went to prom with, the guy she loved in high school. He was voted Best Looking their senior year. Henry was always jealous of him. The guy he could never compare to.

And to make matters worse, Easton was an asshole and Cynthia never saw it.

“Easton didn’t have everything going for him.”

Henry laughed. “I don’t believe that. He was captain of the football team, lacrosse star, and the bastard even starred in the school play. The worst part of all of it, though, was he had you.”

“Things like that don’t last. High school relationships are meant to stay in high school.”

“Especially when he wanted to stay here and you wanted to leave.”

Cynthia nodded. “Yeah.”

He didn’t like her wistful tone any more than he liked the way he felt about himself when he thought about Easton Keen. The few times Henry had run into Easton over the years he was still a d**k, and reminded Henry of everything he didn’t have in high school. It didn’t matter that Henry had changed since then, whenever he saw Easton, he was the same dorky, fat kid he was growing up.

“How about we take a walk?” Henry suggested, needing to get outside. He could check the vines while they walked, brush some snow off the ones they went past. And clear his head.

Thankfully, Cynthia nodded. They pulled on heavy coats, gloves, and boots. When she added a hat with a ball on top, Henry had to laugh.

“What’s wrong with my hat?” Cynthia demanded, fighting a grin.

“I think you forgot how old you are. Didn’t those go out of style when we hit middle school?”

“What’s old is new again. If bell-bottoms can come back into style, my poof hat can.”

Henry followed her outside shaking his head. He pulled his fleece hat from his jacket pocket and tugged it low over his ears. Cynthia looked back to him, letting Henry pick the direction they walked.

They walked together in silence. The only sounds around them were the crunch of snow beneath their boots and the occasional slap of water against the icy shoreline. Henry headed toward the shore, wanting to work his way down there while the sun was out. It wasn’t until he saw the shoreline that he thought about where they were headed.

Cynthia was quiet beside Henry. She saw the shoreline in the distance, edging closer and closer, but didn’t think much of it until Henry stopped in his tracks.

“Are you okay?”

He shook his head, then nodded. “Yeah. Fine. Let’s go back the other way.”

“Why? You don’t want to walk down by the water?”

Henry shook his head. “No. I don’t need to.”

His face was white and he was trembling. Cynthia knew it had nothing to do with the cold. “What’s wrong?” she asked gently, hoping he would tell her.

Henry pulled in a deep breath of cold air and slowly let it out. He started speaking as though he was telling her what he saw instead of what he remembered.

“The summer after I graduated college, Dad decided to replant all the vines down by the water. You know every so often they need to go and new ones need to come in. Those vines were the ones he used to teach me everything I know. I don’t think I can walk through them without seeing him.”

Cynthia slid her hand into his, their gloved palms resting against each other’s. “I’m right here with you.”

She wasn’t going to push him, but she knew he had to walk those rows eventually. The longer he let them haunt him, the harder it would be to go there.

When Henry started walking, he started talking.

“Dad never wanted to lose a vine. He did everything except sleep out here. I think he would have if Mom would have let him. I’m not sure if I learned so much that summer because of the replanting or because Dad was so focused on it that I had to take care of everything else.”

Cynthia chuckled. She could see Mr. Wilson doing that. He loved the vines almost as much as he loved his family. It was like they were his kids, too. Kids he was constantly caring for the same way he cared for his sons.

“There was one row that gave him trouble that whole first year. He couldn’t figure out what was going on. The grapes were small and dark. He threatened to rip the whole row out so many times I lost count.” Henry laughed at the memory. “At the end of the summer, the grapes finally started to grow like they should. Of course, we couldn’t use them anyway, so it didn’t matter, but Dad made sure I understood that if grapes didn’t take, they’d never be good wine grapes.”

Cynthia was silent for a moment. She knew he didn’t want sympathy or pity. But she wanted to let him know she understood.

“Your dad was an amazing man.”

Henry nodded. “The best.”

“You know it’s okay to miss him. Or talk about him. Or grieve for him.”

Henry shrugged. “I have to be there for my mom and Ryan.”

“Who’s there for you, Henry?”

He shook his head. “I don’t need anyone there for me.”

His words burned something deep inside. Like he was saying he didn’t need her. Too bad she needed him. She needed the best friend he’d once been. The almost lover he was a week ago. And whoever he might become in the future.

“I still remember the first time I came over to your house.”

Henry tilted his head, and his eyebrows knitted. “I don’t remember it.”

Cynthia smiled. “Since my dad wasn’t around, I wasn’t used to male voices. Especially as deep as your dad’s. We were studying for an exam, I think. You mom said we could use the table in the dining room. When your dad came home, we were getting a snack in the kitchen. I remember him yelling that the table was full of books and ‘whoever left their s**t everywhere had better come clean it up or I’m throwing it all away!’ I was so terrified. He sounded angry, like he was going to hit us if we weren’t there immediately. I rushed to the table and piled up all my books. I stuffed everything in my backpack just so it was off the table.”

“Even my math book,” Henry said, laughing. “I had no idea where it was when I tried to study that night.”

Cynthia chuckled and nodded. “I found it, but I was too afraid to call your house and let you know I had it in case your dad answered.”

They both laughed. When their laughter died, they walked silently again. Henry brushed off the vines as Cynthia looked over the lake. It wasn’t frozen in the center, but the edges were. She knew Henry watched to see if the lake froze. A frozen lake was bad for grapes. It meant the air temperature dropped an extra couple degrees, which could be the difference in a vine producing good grapes or not.

Mr. Wilson told Cynthia once that Mr. Richliano, Henry’s grandfather, chose that vineyard to work at because of the variety of grapes they could grow at the widest and deepest part of Cayuga Lake. It gave him more variety when he worked in the fields. When he eventually bought the vineyard and took over, he experimented even more, turning Amavita Estates into what it was now.

“He always liked you. He would ask when you were coming over again. He was really upset when you… When we…”

“Me, too,” she admitted, the pain easing when she squeezed his hand.

“You were the one who never called. Why were you upset?”

She shrugged. “You were my best friend. And it was a really bad time for me. I didn’t want our friendship to be over. You were so mad though, and I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me.”

“I wanted to talk to my best friend. To find out what I did wrong. But she was gone. Losing your friendship was harder than hearing the words you said to me.”

“I never should have said any of that, Henry. I was… I was in a bad place that day. It wasn’t you.”

“What was it?”

Cynthia shook her head. “It doesn’t matter anymore. What matters is I’m sorry for all the things I said and wish things could have been different for us.”

“Yeah, me too,” Henry said.

Cynthia was glad he didn’t push for more. She never told anyone what happened that weekend. Finding her mom crying over her dad almost twenty years after he left solidified what she knew. Love meant pain.

And she proved it when Henry said he loved her.

Cynthia left an hour later with cold toes and a frozen nose. Henry warmed her up with a few kisses, but otherwise kept his hands to himself. He told himself it was because he wanted her to know he wanted more than s*x from her, but the truth was, he knew he wouldn’t be able to watch her walk away if they took things too quickly.

He walked into his mother’s house that evening with a loaf of bread and a bottle of wine from his collection. He didn’t bother knocking, but was shocked to find the house quiet when he got inside.

Henry kicked off his boots and set the bread and wine on the counter in the kitchen. His mom’s car was outside, so he knew she was home. He called out a few times, but she didn’t answer.

The door slammed open, a gust of wind catching it. Henry jumped and spun, finding his brother on the doorstep instead of their mom.

“Have you seen Mom?” Henry asked.

Ryan shook his head, his eyes filling with concern. “Did you call her?”

“Yeah. She didn’t answer.”

“Her car’s here.”

“I know.”

“Mom!” they both called, moving into the house. “Mom!” Ryan followed Henry down the hallway to the bedroom. The door was closed, and there was no answer when they knocked. Henry tested the knob and his heart rate kicked up when it turned in his hand.

Ryan pushed into the bedroom behind Henry. It took him a minute for his eyes to adjust, but when they did, Henry found his mother laying in the middle of her bed.

“Mom,” Ryan said, moving toward her.

Jo sat up, shocked to find them in her room. Tears ran down her face and soaked her shirt. “What are you boys doing here?” Jo asked, her voice trembling.

“Dinner, Ma. It’s Saturday night.”

“Oh, I’m sorry boys. I guess I lost track of my days. Give me a minute and I’ll fix something.”

“Come on, Mom,” Henry said gently. He turned on a lamp on the night stand, casting an eerie glow over the room. “Why don’t you wash your face and we can get some food from The Drunken Grape?”

Jo chuckled. “You know, your dad loved that name. He didn’t want to tell the rest of us, but he thought it was the best one of the options. He even voted for it.”

Henry nodded as he coaxed his mom out of bed. She finally went into the bathroom and splashed water on her face. He handed her a towel and heard Ryan on the phone in the other room, ordering dinner Henry hoped.

“Oh, jeez. I’m still in my pajamas. Are you sure it’s Saturday?”

Henry nodded and guided his mother back into her room. “You can stay in your pajamas, Mom. We don’t care.”

“Well, I need to cook something.”

Henry shook his head. “Ryan is already taking care of it.”

“You boys shouldn’t have to take care of me. I’m your mother.”

“We don’t mind, Mom. It’s fine.”

Henry grabbed her glasses and followed her into the kitchen. “I should have something in here we can have for dinner.”

“Already ordered, Mom. Andie is about to leave and said she’d bring dinner by on her way home.”

“Oh, I’m so embarrassed,” Jo said.

Henry shook his head, noting his brother did the same. “There’s no reason to be embarrassed, Mom.”

“Andie doesn’t care if you’re in your pajamas or dressed to the nines, Mom. She’s going to see Cody so she won’t be staying regardless.”

“You all shouldn’t have to take care of me. I should have had dinner ready when you boys got here.”

“Mom, it’s okay.”

“I’m your mother.”

“Yeah, and we just lost our father. You’re supposed to be grieving. Give yourself a break, Mom.”

Henry shot his brother a glare, but it was too late. The lip quivered. The eyes filled. The breath froze.

Then the tears fell.