My Love Letters To Food

If At First, You Don't Succeed: You Get A Little More Than What You Wished For

Sitting on the bench, I almost topple over when Food climbs out of his window. "For goodness sake, Food!! You almost scared the poor guy to death. Use the door next time or shout before you just jump out." Sine scolds Food. He just rolls his eyes at Sine and sits on the other end of the bench, topless this time.

Not wanting to bother him, I get up and sit on the other end of the balcony and stare at him and Sine. Looking restlessly around the balcony, he kneels on the bench and stares at my building.

"You should just go and ask who lives up there already." Sine encourages Food. "Why?", he asks bored and P'Mait walks out. "He doesn't believe I know the guy who lives there so let him stare. Maybe oneday with his stinky attitude, he'll insult his way up there." P'Mait points to my balcony and I look at him, brows scrunched, in confusion. 

"Hia, you don't know who lives there. That's the penthouse." P'Mait points to me and I blush profusely."Prove it." P'Mait smiles and I pull out my phone to show him pictures of me in the apartment and on that balcony. "See for yourself." He looks at the pictures and smiles softly. My heart melts the more he smiles. "I told you I know the guy who lives there." P'Mait flexes and Sine rolls his eyes.

"You have a beautiful apartment.", he compliments while returning my phone and I nod, smiling. "Thank you." my already small voice whispers out, even lower. Turning back around, Food stares at the people with cameras just staring at my gate under the excruciating morning heat. "Is it always this crazy?" P'Mait asks and I immediately shake my head, "No. It's never been this crazy. Half of them have taken pictures of me all my life. I can't figure out what's wrong today." 

"Aren't you the new Chef Sexy after that other famous old guy? Maybe that's why." Sine tries to reason and P'Mait smacks him behind his head. "That's his father, you i***t! Nam is Nam Sangsamphan, the child of Tho Songsamphan and Jiew Coates! They want to capture the moment of the fan that will win and everyone wants to be that fan. That is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to meet two of the most influential people in Thailand. There should be more people out there." 

That makes a lot more sense now. People must think they will meet my parents. Idiots. I don't even live at home. However, knowing my parents, they will show up for my first fan date. "Oh." Sine seems to understand. 

Food looks over his shoulder and directly at me. "I think someone is down there for you. There is a blacked-out SUV down there and they are surrounding it." Panic takes over my features and I ask immediately, "What color is it?" 

"White." 

"P'Andda." Pulling out my phone, I call her and direct her here. "P'Anda, tell P'Max to park at the gate across the street. You can see my car from the gate. Go inside the lobby and I'll come to get you." She ends the call and I stare at it. "Such a diva," I mumble to myself and stand up to get her. Food walks out into the house before any of us can react and is out the door faster with his long strides. "P'Mait, is he okay?" I ask and P'Mait shrugs his shoulder. We go to wait for Food by the front door. 

"So, you're just going to stand here and wait? Or are you-" I nod and so does Sine, while walking away.

After minutes of waiting, Food opens the door. Still topless and I am only able to get a good look at him now. This tall beast of a boy is about to make my knees weak in front of my agent! The woman who sees everything! "I'm over here Nam." P'Anda pulls my chin to face her and I blush at her catching me staring at Food. 

"Are you okay? Why did you come?" I ask question after question and she puts her finger up to stop me. 

"I am fine. I came because I needed to see who won before we announce them. Social media, family. The works. You took their information, right? The last thing we need is a wronged fan." She is right down to business in this heat and with everything going on.

The obvious masculine decore distracts her for a few seconds as she makes her way to the couch to make herself at home. I follow her and we sit down. Thank goodness I cleaned before Miss OCD came. "Nobody won. I was almost ambushed before I even got to campus. Remember?" She rolls her eyes and looks towards the balcony door where all the boys are sitting to give us some privacy. 

"You are in here with three people. Which one of them saw you first after you left the station?" My eyes instantly widen and she looks towards Food. Without thinking, I'm sure, she shouts, "Loom and Gloom! Come here!" Food points to himself and she nods, "Yes, you! The one who gave me the coldest welcome ever!" P'Mait and Sine laugh at him as he walks in feeling a smidge bit smaller than when he walked out. "Yes?" He asks her as he stands before her, hands behind his back. 

"Did you see him immediately after he got out of his car?" She asks him directly and he nods, scratching his eyes as they water a little. "Then congratulations! You win a fan date with Chef Nam. Now, I will need some additional information like..." and Sine chokes on the water he just took a sip of. I am stuck in place as P'Anda babbles on to Food about what information he has to provide her with. He stares at her completely stuck. "Excuse me?" I finally ask when the initial shock is over. "What now?" P'Anda asks as she searches the i********: handle he gives her. "H-He's not even a fan of my w-work. I'm sure P'Mait can do it o-or Sine." I point to the other two occupants and everyone looks at me funny, especially Food. "What's wrong with me? Plus, I won fair and square. I saw you first after that interview." P'Anda smiles at him then laughs at me. 

"Doom and Gloom has a point. He meets all the requirements as well. He's in your faculty." Food stares at me and I want the world to swallow me whole. Why did P'Anda have to tell him? He didn't need to know that! "I've never seen you on campus before? What year?" Food asks me as P'Anda scrolls through his profile. 

"Not important.", is all I answer and he just scoffs at me. 

We all wait for P'Anda to finish her search on his profile and her smile, in the end, tells me my worst fear, he passed. 

"Right, Mr. Suppasit, we will be announcing you as the winner tonight and filming live on Sunday. You will assist Nam with preparing the meal. After, you and three people of your choosing will enjoy this meal with Nam and his family. They insisted. This will also serve as the celebratory dinner for the release date announcement of Miss Jiew Costes' new book. You're about to be a part of history Kid." P'Mait and Sine are behind Food at this point paying close attention to their invitation by association. 

"Is it suit and tie or something?" Food asks kind of bored with the whole conversation now. "No, you just need to be casual. The family is very casual. Formality isn't allowed at the dinner table. Ask him. Any more questions, feel free to ask Nam or email me. Don't waste your time calling me. Bye, bye Kids!"

P'Anda rushes out of the apartment and leaves me in awkward silence with Food. "Wow! This is so cool! Imagine! Me at the same table as Jiew Coates!" Sine gets excited over meeting my mother and P'Mait shoots daggers at him. He pretends to not see. "That's his mother. Show some respect." a scolding finds him about to ask me a million and one questions. "I am! I just have a lot of career questions for her. She is like the superwoman of tech in television and content creation! The Picasso of my dream job. She is responsible for so many advancements in camera tech and application design!" To my surprise, Sine really is a fan of my mother's work. I thought he was another perverted fan. 

"You know that much about one person? How come I didn't know?" Food asks Sine as P'Mait walks into the kitchen. "You never asked.", is Sine's reply and I can't help but think it has a double meaning. The obvious tension coming from Sine and Food forces me to talk even though I wanted to say absolutely nothing to Food and Sine for the rest of the day. 

"We need to record the announcement of the competition. Please put on a shirt. We can do it now so I can edit it.", is my defuser of the situation. Food gives Sine one last look and walks down the hallway. The slam of a door tells everyone in the apartment that Food is now in his bedroom. I hope he's in there to change. 

Abruptly, Sine storms down the hallway too and slams a door as well. I expected shouting a few seconds later but after a full minute, I conclude he's gone to P'Mait's bedroom. 

"Well, wow," I mumble to myself and P'Miat points me to the couch. Timidly, I sit on the couch but across from P'Miat. "I've been meaning to talk to you this past week." I nod and look him in the eyes. He seems serious about whatever he needs to say. "I need your help. I would talk to them but I think Sine has had his fill with my brothers' attitude. You just saw it. I need them to be separated for a few weeks because this will end in a fight so can you please just hang out with him for a while? Please? Please? Nam, I'm desperate, please?" P'Mait's begging makes me give in before he can ask again because it's clear he's desperate. "Okay. Okay. Just stop begging. It's making me sad." I whine as he cradles his head in his hands. A sigh of relief leaves his body and his shoulders relax. "Thank you so much. I-" 

"Don't thank me just yet. Your brother needs to agree, as well. I don't mind attitude but I won't beg him to hang out. Talk to him about that. What do need me to do with him, anyway?" 

P'Mait looks down the hallway and then back to me. "Pick him up for school is a start. Sine used to do it but then this situation started and he goes with me now. I leave too early and he barely sleeps now. Maybe go to the mall with him or go to his games. I honestly don't know how Sine put up with him this long and I have no idea what he does in his spare time. Just drag him along with you." 

Drag him along with me as I plan additional meals for him? Just great. "Fine." I have always loved a challenge. 

I lie. I hate anything unpredictable and unplanned. 

"I owe you one. I'm just a phone call away if he gets out of hand. I sent my number to your DM's. Thank you."

"Not a problem. Can I ask why me though? I'm sure he has more friends that would be more than willing." I ask P'Mait curiously."He needs a person who can show him a different perspective on life. Someone who isn't scared of him." He explains and I guess I understand. His friends are definitely pushovers for him because he's Food Suppasit and you don't want to upset him. I don't care that much about his attitude to condone it. I guess London did change me some. I came back more courageous. More able to speak up when I don't like something or the way someone speaks to me. 

"Okay. I'll do it. For you. But don't complain if he says I'm rude or too busy." P'Mait nods and smiles at me. 

I wonder what has really been going on between Sine and Food. If P'Mait sees it fit to intervene then something serious must be going on between these two.

Food comes back into the living room dressed much better than I expected. He actually ironed his t-shirt and pants. Both fit him very snug and stretched well over his muscles. He even came back with a tripod and ring light. "I thought you'd need these." He offers them to me with outstretched hands and I stand up to take them. "Where is the best lighting?" I ask Food and he points to a spot in front of the sliding glass doors that lead to the balcony. Walking over to the area, I take out my phone and examine the light quality. It's very bright and clear which is good because during a video light tends to decrease and become spotty. 

Once it is all set up and ready for filming, Food adjusts the height of the stand, "Do you have a stepping stool for me then?" I ask Food and he rolls his eyes. P'Mait hands me a small stepping block. "Our mom uses it to pack away groceries." I thank him and stand on it. Looking at my phone mounted and open to IG Live page, I test the angle and I'm happy with it. Food adjusts his hair. "Can we start?" He asks annoyed and I step down to hit the red live button. Within seconds people join the live and we are up to the hundreds in minutes. 

"Hello everyone!! I am your cooking buddy, Chef Nam, and I am here with today's winner. This is Food Suppasit and he was the first person to find me!" Food smiles and waves. "Hello." He waves at the camera. Reading the comments, I take a few questions from my followers. "I'll take a few questions now. 

Okay first person asks you Food,'Where did you two meet and how was it meeting Nam?'" 

Food does the unexpected and smiles at me first before he answers. "To be honest, I was down with the flu all morning. So when my brother said his friend needed me to get him outside our apartment, I was surprised to see it was him. I'd mostly seen him on my feed so it was shocking." Food explains and everyone goes crazy with the hearts of all colors. "Another person asks, 'P'Food, are you looking forward to your date with P'Nam? Will it be just a dinner for two or can we watch?'" We both laugh. I am sure my ears are red! How can it be that our first date will be such an affair? I wanted it to be over the top and grand but now I have to work with him and he has to have dinner with my nosey family too! Who did I offend in what heaven?

"I don't know what we will cook but we are having dinner with his family and three people of my choice." Food answers and reads the next question. "P'Nam, can I ship you with him? Please? He's so cute!" I almost choke on my own saliva. "You answer that. I don't know what to say."

"Umh, I have no problem. I really don't know what that is but it can't be bad, right?" He smiles at the camera and P'Mait tilts his head skeptically at him. Sine just laughs on the couch beside us but out of view. My expression is a cross between shock and 'Are you sure?'. He smiles at the spam comments written #FoodNam. Uh oh.

My phone starts to show notifications from P'Anda and I know this isn't good. "Umh, I think that's enough for now. We still have Sunday to talk to everyone. Please have your questions ready and we will answer them. Do not forget to drop suggestions for Sundays in my posts for the week and we will announce the winning meal on Friday so everyone can get their ingredients ready for Sunday as usual! Have a good rest of your week. Bye." Food helps me down and I know that everyone's screenshot game is on point. Switching the live off, Food and I look at each other and I want to slap him. "We are so screwed.", is all I have the energy to say as he looks at me confused. 

"What? What's a ship anyway?" HGe asks me and I sit down trying to answer all of P'Anda's messages. 

"A ship, you i***t, is when people imagine you two are a couple and blow every interaction out of proportion. Be ready to be #FoodNam." Food shrugs and walks off down the hall. 

When his door bangs shut I look at Sine and P'Mait confused. "He really has no idea what a ship is?" They both nod and I palm my face. "Well, he's about to find out now, "P'Mait says more to himself than the both of us. "Look at your feed, Nam."

Opening my app for i********:, I see the most amount disturbing amount of tags in my notifications. "It hasn't even been ten minutes since the live ended. Where are these posts coming from?" 

"A user called 'Fon Da Doll'." Sine reads over my shoulder and I want to die a million deaths. Betrayed by my own aunt. 

Rushing to the balcony, I close the glass sliding door and frantically take out my phone, dialing her number. It only takes three rings before she answers excitedly. "Ahhh!!! You did it Nami! #FoodNam is real!!" I have to pull the phone away from my ear to hear her at a normal frequency because her voice is octaves above human hearing. "Pa Fon! What have you done? He doesn't even understand what a ship is and now you have single-handedly posted every compromising angle of that Live. Why?" I ask embarrassed and scared that Food will blow his top if he knows she's related to me. On Sunday he will know she's related to me. What do I do?

"You clearly have no idea how lucky you are. Your lifelong crush is within your grasp. Gay or not, in that live he was giving you goo goo eyes. Everyone saw it, including P'Anda which is why she called me to find out more. I told her to ask you but still- Wait, does he remember you from your school days?" Aunt Fon asks and I know I have to answer, "I'm not sure. If he does, he and Sine are playing stupid. P'Mait hasn't said anything either." 

"Something else is up. What gives Nami? Tell me now before I come over and find out." She must be squinting her eyes and staring daggers at her co-workers now. That's her thinking face. I laugh at the thought of it. "I can't talk right now. They are on the other side of a glass door and Food jumps out of the window leading to where I am all the time. Plus I think he's going through some phase. It's a bit of a mess over here." I try to explain just enough for her to understand that I cannot talk right now. "Okay, so after work, I'll be over. I'll bring takeout. NamFon night! I cannot wait! I haven't even been to your place yet. It's a date! Bye, bye!" 

She hung up on me. She hung up on me just like P'Anda. Does anyone know the meaning of saying goodbye on the phone? It's to end the call before you disconnect! I swear everyone around me has no manners at all.

"Holy Buddha and all the monks!! You scared me!!" I scream as Food drops down from the now open window. He jumps down and looks me up and down. Food has changed his clothes once again. Black boxers and a white t-shirt mold the form of his body as he stretches out and leans on the cement balcony rail while facing him. "Sorry." is all he mumbles. "I saw what a ship is.", are his first nice words to me today. "And?". I ask curiously about his thoughts on the whole thing. Before he can answer P'Anda's calls and I put her on loudspeaker out of habit. "Yes, P?" She laughs and then speaks. "#FoodNam is trending number three on Twitter and it hasn't even been a day! This is the best free publicity ever! Where is Doom and Gloom?" I want to put her off the loudspeaker setting. How can she call him that? "He's right here. We were just talking about the ship. He didn't know what it was." 

"Good because this could be an interesting week for you both. The bosses above me have called and asked we do a full weekend's coverage leading to the dinner. It's already Friday so spend Saturday and Sunday together just to ride out this hype and if you both don't hate it too much, we will talk ships on Monday. This could be good for you too Food. The reach Nam has with critics and chefs alike could help you become a full-time food critic." Why is this happening to me? I was meant to court Food in grand gestures and make him fall in love with a stranger but now I'm stuck with him. Potentially. 

"P'Anda, I'm sure Food has better things to do with his time. Sunday is enough." I try to dissuade the direction of this conversation. "No, I don't." Food buts in and I only realize now that he's right in front of me. Right in my personal space. The hairs on his body are brushing against the hairs of my body. His chest is inches away from my head. "See Nam, he's not busy at all. You take him along your Saturday shopping Live. I'll be watching!" She creams excitedly and disconnects the call. Left feeling bullied into being around Food for the next few weeks, I slide down the glass of the door and contemplate why my life is like this.  

"What's wrong with you?" Food asks me as he sits down opposite me. "This is not the weekend I ordered.", I mutter out as I pout at nowhere in particular. Biting my lip out of habit, a sting burns on my left knee. Did FOod just hit me? 

"Ouch! That hurt!" I rub my bruised skin as he sits back. "Don't bite your lip. It's a bad habit." Frowning at him, I pout more and try to stand up but someone opens the door behind me and I fall back onto the floor. Oh, my balls of a giant!! I am staring at the biggest balls I have ever seen in my life and not in a good way. "P'Mait! Where is your underwear?" I ask as I just lay down and cover my eyes with my hands. "Hia! I've told you to stop doing that." Shuffling goes around me until I am lifted up. "And I've told you to move out but we can't all get what we want," P'Mait answers Food but he sounds further than before. Opening my eyes, P'Mait is sitting on the bench from earlier today as Food continues to sit opposite me on the balcony floor. "What's wrong? When I opened the door you looked like your life was over." Rolling my eyes, I remember P'Anda ending my life. 

"He's just sulking because his agent wants us to be a ship for the weekend. I have to go shopping with him and stuff tomorrow and Sunday. If it works out in favor of his career, we may become a ship or whatever. She offered to make me a full-time critic." Food informs him of the phone call between P'Anda and the two of us. "That sounds great! I mean you two hanging out and stuff. He could be a good influence on you like I've always told you." P'Miat supports this madness! Of course, he does. He just asked me to do the same thing earlier. Why is the world pushing Food Suppapsit in my direction in the wrong way? I want him to love me, not be, my co-worker!

My internal turmoil goes unnoticed by my two companions as P'Mait lays down some ground rules for Food to abide by during our time together. I don't even pay attention to him rattle off a list of Do's and Don'ts' to his younger brother. 

"And remember, one complaint from Nam and Hia will hospitalize you like last time. Don't tempt us again. Are we clear?" P"Mait threatens Food and I am confused. They have an older brother?

"You would tell Hia." Food pushes P'Mait but he just takes out his phone and starts looking for a number. He shows us both the number and name. 'Hia Jason'

His finger looms over the dial button and Food begs P'Mait. "Okay, okay. I'll be on my best behavior. Just don't call that crazy i***t. My arm almost didn't recover last time." Food rolls his left shoulder and hugs his left arm. 

"Good." 

"Oh, man! I thought Hia Jason was going to come here and go bat s**t crazy again! I was looking forward to seeing his mean self run!" Sine jokes as he walks out onto the balcony and sits next to P'Mait. "Are you really my best friend?" Food asks him and he just shrugs his shoulders. "Mmh" is Sines response and I start to feel their tension again. My father said that I have always been sensitive to hostile feelings since I was a baby. 

"Anyway, since I'm stuck with you let's go over some ground rules. Number one, ask before you post anything with me in it. Number two, I leave for the market at six AM. If you are late by even a second, I will leave you. I have vendors waiting for me with reserved food I will order in advance. They will sell it if I am late. Okay?" My rules are very simple for shopping but very important. I have watched my father have the same relationship with vendors so his restaurant can have the best quality of food. The quality affects the caliber of the meal and cooking for my parents, especially my father, I have to make sure everything is perfect and ready for the best of critics. He is a perfectionist and I have been on the receiving end of his criticism before. This meal must be perfect. Not even Food can mess this up for me. 

"Okay. Six AM and ask before posting. Got it." Food mocks me and I roll my eyes at him. He can go fly a kite for all I care.

Getting up and walking towards the rail of the balcony, I check to see how many people are still out there and instead of decreasing in numbers, there are more people out there than this morning. "I need a nap. They aren't going anywhere." I mumble to myself and yawn immediately after. Sine rushes inside and P'Mait shakes his head. Food stands up and points towards his bedroom window. "Huh?", I ask him and he points towards his open window. "You can sleep in my room." Stunned by his suggestion, I look at him as shocked as I feel. "No thank you, I'll just use the door if that's okay. I'm not very good at climbing." P'Mait laughs and stands to go inside. "He meant you can sleep in his room. Use the door to get there though." P'Miat explains to me and walks through the door. 

Feeling as much of an i***t as I must look, I walk in right after P'Mait and do not wait for Food to lead the way. Walking in, I look at the photographs that litter the hallway walls and I'm surprised Food is such an artist when it comes to painting. He's a little Piccaso there. All of them have his signature. Beach scenes and city skylines in differing shades, shapes, and perspectives come together to give the feeling of a mini gallery. 

Opening the door, I entre a very different version of who Food Suppasit is. When he'd opened the door earlier, Food had obscured most of the room and it was dark because of the closed curtains and the lights being turned off. Now, I am walking into a cream and white paradise. This is far from what I expected. It is absolutely spotless and has a warm scent to it. Vanilla and orangey scents wrap the room in a warm hug much more different from the rest of the apartment which is dark brown and tan.  

"Sorry about the mess but I've been in bed all day. You can change the sheet and stuff. Spares are in that closet by the window or you can just sleep, I put them in on Monday. I'm going to talk to Sine. I might come in when you're asleep. Professor Crazy wants her homework from yesterday." With that said, he leaves me in his bedroom alone.