My heart is black.
Pain,
Loss,
Self-destruction... You name it.
These are the only things I feel now.
Should I really be caring for this pack? Should I really be working in this clinic day in and day out, watching families who care so deeply for each other, watching the little lives growing in their mothers' protruding bellies, wishing so badly that I were in their place?
I'm witnessing these never-ending cycles.... one pup growing, one pup born. I deserve this torture. I deserve to watch and despair in my own black misery.
I painted my hair black today. The outside almost matches the inside now... almost.
I'm not allowed near Rayven anymore. He has a mate now. She's so beautiful, and I wish I could take back the nasty things I said to her in the beginning. I wish I could be her fr
