BLESSED

Chapter 4

I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the rejection that I was about to get.

“ Tyler, can I talk to you?” Amy found a way to keep Mark focused on her so he won’t ask anything while we leave, he nods and whispers a quick ‘sure’ before standing up and following me to my, sometimes our, room.

I close the door behind me and I feel the tears coming up, my heart is beating faster than anything. Tyler noticed that I was about to cry and hugged me, whispering things in my ear, trying to calm me down.

“ What’s going on, babe?” He whispers and helps me sitting down in bed, I let my head fall on his shoulder as I try to control my breathing. 

“ I- I…” my treat is sore and I can’t speak, is like my voice won't work anymore and it only hurts when I try.

After a couple of minutes I finally calm down, Tyler is now in front of me, crouched down staring at me right in the eye while grabbing my little hands on his big ones,

“ Tell me what's going on, love…” he whispers again, he sounds worried, that’s new…

“ I found out that-” I take another deep breath as Tyler’s facial expression falls, what is he so worried about? “ I found out that I’m pregnant Ty…” Tears start falling down my cheeks again and Tyler stands up, letting my hands fall on my knees. 

“ What?” He asks with a serious expression on his face.

“ I’m pregnant, Ty,” I repeat and he starts giggling, a nervous giggle.

“ This is a joke, isn't it? You’re making one of those pranks, aren't you Cami?! Where’s the camera?” He starts looking around and pacing in the room.

“ It’s not a joke… there is no hidden camera.” I wish this was all a prank, it would be much easier. I stand up and try to stop Tyler but he’s too strong and I end up falling on my butt. 

“ This is your fault! It’s all your f*****g fault!” He yells at me as I slowly stand up.

“ My fault?! I can't make a baby on my own can I?!” I yell back and he simply looks at me.

“ We’re over. I don't want to have anything to do with this stupid kid of yours, and I’m sure it isn't even mine, you stupid slut…” he whispers with contempt.

Even if I was already expecting this reaction, his words hurt, like knives stabbing my heart repeatedly. I already knew that I would end up alone but this baby is still ours not just mine, he cannot blame me for what happened. I can't get pregnant on my own that's not how it works!

If he wants to blame someone he’ll have to blame both of us.

And calling me a slut? When I’ve been here for him every single time he needed, even when he wasn't there for me?! I knew that I shouldn't have dated Tyler, but I’m a fool, a fool that has fallen in love with a guy that doesn't deserve it.

“ Your friend, Melissa, is better than you anyway…” he says and walks out of the room and slamming the door, and leaving me forever.

I might see Tyler around, but not one of the words coming out of my mouth will be directed to him, never again.

He should have understood, even if he didn't want to take care of the kid, he could try to help even if it's only the tiniest bit!

What have I done to deserve this? What have I done to deserve a boy that doesn't love me, never loved me, the way I loved him? 

Now, I and my little baby are all alone, I will need to find a job and try to find a new house. This little apartment where I and Amy are living only has 2 rooms and it doesn't enough space for a baby to grow in.

I wipe the tears off of my face and grab my computer, maybe I should start working now before my belly grows too much, and then I won’t be able to. 

And I need to do all of these appointments! AHHHH, I’m going to focus on that later, for now, I’m going to search for jobs near this apartment.

Some minutes pass by and Amy comes in, she doesn't say a thing, she slowly walks to me and hugs me, of course, she knew what was going to happen, even I, the love blind one could see that this wasn't going to end up well.

We stay in silence while hugging each other, I’m glad she didn’t ask for anything now, but I’m pretty sure that she will, maybe in a few days. 

She pulls away and looks at me with some tears in her eyes and then smiles, kissing me on the cheek before walking out of the door, closing it behind her.

Going back to my lonely state I grab my computer once again and start searching, I’m trying to find something where I won’t need to do a lot of effort and is only a short period of time so that I can hide my belly and save some money.

I need a job that will give me enough amount of money for an apartment with 2 rooms, I have some savings but I need some more money to be able to buy an apartment, baby things, and food for a couple of months.

Maybe I should listen to music while searching, it helps me focusing and right now, the silence is too Lous and I really need something to get my mind out of what just happened 10 minutes ago.

An announcement catches my attention, I would only work for 4 months and all I needed to do was being a personal assistant, it says that I don't need any experience and it would give me enough money for everything I need, and a little more!

This is perfect! I click on it and start reading everything, is only about 20 minutes walking from here, and the owner is Zach Santos, I’ve heard about him…

Not all of them were good things, I’ve heard that he’s a playboy and that likes to play with girl’s hearts… he always goes to parties and is actually really laid back for a 23-year old that owns an industry.

I make a little mental note to come back here later, I save the job announcement and search through the others.

Is not easy to find a job that will accept a 17-year-old that dropped out of school…

15 minutes passed by and I couldn't find any job that was as good as that one, I went back to it and saw the number on my screen, I should probably call before someone takes my place.

I dialogue the number on my phone and press the call button, my heart skips a beat when a female voice answers the phone after the first ring.

“ Hi, good evening, I’m Miss Sarah from Santos Inc., how can I help?” The woman speaks really fast but I gladly got everything. 

“Hm... Hi, I saw the job announcement on the internet and-” I start speaking but the woman cuts me off.

“ Are you interested Miss…” she lets her voice trail off, asking me what my name is.

“ Camilla, Camilla Orteaga,” I tell the lady, for some reason I’m really nervous.

“ Okay…” she whispers. “ Mr. Santos will be able to have you, on Wednesday’s morning, is that okay for you?” The woman asks.

“ Yes is perfect!” I say, a little too excitedly, the woman giggles when I apologize.

“ We will be waiting for you, around 10 am.” The woman announces.

“ Thank you,” I whisper. She says a quick goodbye and sees you soon, she actually sounded nice. 

I lay down in bed again, this interview has to go well, or else I don't know what is going to happen to me and my little baby…

And now thinking of that, with that I mean the little thing growing up inside of me, I need to give them a name…

I pick my laptop and open a note, I’m going to make a list of girl names and a list of boy names, then I’m going to select the ones that are my favorites and the ones that I don't want anymore.

It might be too early to be already choosing names, but I’m going to start working and I’m going to try to focus on that, so the name list it is.

I’m going to start by boys' names, writing everything that comes to my mind.

Apollo Angelo David Thomas  Trevor Tristian Jakob Lukas Louis Lorenzo

And that is the list I have, I start eliminating names until I only have 2, making up the most random excuses to take a name off. And now is time for the girl names.

Angela Davina Taliah Hope Naiara Gabriellah Mariza Ravenna  Isabella Verah

And I do the same as I did with the other list, I slowly look through the list over and over again until I’m left with two names.

For boy names, I have, Apollo and Lukas.

And for girl names I have, Taliah and Hope.

Hope did catch my attention because all I have is Hope.

The hope that this is all going to end okay and that I and my kid will have a good life, the hope that I’ll get this damn job and work my ass off so that I and my kid can be happy, even without a father figure, we can still be happy.

Now I’m finding myself wishing that it is a girl, in the beginning, I couldn't care less, all I wanted was a healthy child but now that I thought of names, Hope is my favorite one and I would love to have a daughter with that name.

But

If a boy comes out of my v****a, I won't be mad because I’ll have the name Apollo, the god of art, and Apollo is a really good name, it would be me and my little boy living our simple lives, nothing more and nothing less.

For now, all that I have to do is wait, it’s already 2 am which means that is already Saturday and I’ll have to be in the office on Wednesday, so these days I have plenty of free time that I didn't know I will occupy. 

Maybe I should try to start taking photos of my belly so that I could see if it grows fast or not because I’ll have to control that, we’re in the winter so using sweaters will help me cover my tummy. Unless we have a way to go dressed to the office, that will complicate things a little bit.

If I’m not able to go in a sweater and I’ll have to wear like, a dress, that means that I’ll have less time to work because my tummy will become visible earlier. Or I can just say that I gained weight after staying at my grandmother's house on the weekend.

That’s usually what happens when we visit them, isn’t it? We go there skinny and fit and we come out a big potato.

I can use that as an excuse but now I’ll stop thinking.

Standing up from the chair and stretching I go to the bed and lay down, closing my eyes.

Tyler’s warmth is not beside me, laying down and cuddling but I don't feel like I’m going to die without him, all I feel is that I’m stronger without the bastard that I called a boyfriend.

And he’ll see how Camilla Orteaga, is an independent woman that can handle herself with a baby, even if she’s only 17 years old and her dear ‘boyfriend’ left her.

He’ll see.