Emptiness

1731 Words
Kyrian did not wake angry, he woke up empty. Not the fragile kind of emptiness that trembled and begged and hoped. Not the hollow ache that once throbbed whenever Damon turned away, this was different. The suppression had burned through him like wildfire, stripped something raw from beneath his ribs and left behind scorched earth. The bond still existed faint, dulled, distant but it no longer clawed at him, It no longer reached and in that silence, something inside Kyrian shifted. He lay in his bed in the pack house, staring at the ceiling, listening to the subtle movements outside his door. Guards. Always guards now. Two stationed at the corridor entrance. One posted discreetly near the courtyard whenever Kyrian was permitted outside. The elders called it precaution but Kyrian called it surveillance. “You’re to report to Head Steward Mara in the morning,” the guard said stiffly. “Pack house staff rotation. Direct order.” Kyrian stood very still. “From the council?” he asked. The guard hesitated. “From the Alpha.” Of course. Kyrian inclined his head once. “Understood.” He did not ask why. He wasn’t surprised he had been sent back to the staff quarters to resume his chores since the bond suppression had been carried out. The bond was still there but it wasn’t as responsive as it used to be and Kyrian was happy about it, his chances of running away had increased. That plan was still very much on the table, he just needed to strategize properly. Kyrian stood in the servants’ wing of the pack house wearing plain black and grey simple linen, sleeves rolled. In the same house where he had been among the Omegas as a maid, once been paraded as Alpha’s mate and now back to being a maid again. The irony almost made him laugh. “You’ll tend the east corridor and the council wing,” Mara said. “Quietly.” Kyrian took the parchment. “Yes, ma’am.” Around him, other staff members pretended not to stare but they stared anyway. The omega was scrubbing floors again, he had fallen they whispered. Kyrian scuffed. “ fallen? I never rose to anywhere, I was destined to forever be amongst the lowest of lows. The bond was a cruel joke and a slap in my face. Will I ever stop being the topic of discussion for the pack?. I miss how quiet my life used to be.” Kyrian whispered to himself. By midmorning, half the house knew he was back to the Omega quarters. He had not seen his best friend since he was reassigned. He really missed him and they had a lot to catch up on. Kyrian moved through his tasks without hesitation. He polished railings, changed linens, carried fresh towels to guest rooms. He did not rush, he did not drag his feet, he did not look broken. He looked precise, controlled, every sweep of the cloth was deliberate, every folded sheet exact, if humiliation was intended, Kyrian wasn’t going to give them that satisfaction. He had not seen Alpha Damon since the last time at the council meeting and he was grateful for that. Across the pack house, Damon stood at the long dining table and didn’t look towards the pack house once. Hannah sat beside him, too close. Her hand rested lightly against Damon’s forearm, fingers brushing his skin in subtle, comforting strokes. She spoke softly, tone warm, attentive. Damon listened. He actually listened. Kyrian watched from the upper balcony of the pack house without being seen. He was cleaning one of the warriors quarters when his sight turned towards the Next building where the Alpha and the high ranking wolves dine. Damon had not visited him since the day of the suppression. He had come the first night and stood outside Kyrian’s window behind the pack house while he slept without any one noticing him. Then something in him hardened again. Now, he functioned as if nothing had happened. As if the suppression hadn’t ripped through them, as If Kyrian hadn’t nearly died. Alpha Damon and Hannah were also the talk of the pack and Hannah enjoyed it while Damon just didn’t care. He was back to being cold, distant and as ruthless as before. Whispers trailed through corridors like smoke. “She’s a true Luna, strong and always supporting the Alpha, She’s always there to solve pack issues, poor girl had to go through that whole drama that Omega started to attract attention, Alpha Damon doesn’t even look at the omega and the omega doesn’t look at him either.” They gossiped. It was true. Kyrian didn’t look anymore, not when Damon passed him in the hallway. Not when their shoulders nearly brushed in council chambers. Not when Damon stood outside in the courtyard at night, gaze lifted toward Kyrian’s window like a silent habit he couldn’t break. Kyrian saw him, He just didn’t acknowledge it or pretended not to notice. And that indifference unsettled Damon more than anger ever could. Hannah adjusted Damon’s collar with deliberate care. “You didn’t sleep,” she murmured. “I did.” She smiled gently. “For an hour.” He didn’t argue. He hadn’t been sleeping well. The suppression dulled the bond but hadn’t erased sensation entirely. There were moments sharp, unexpected when a flicker of Kyrian’s presence brushed against him and then disappeared again. Like a ghost stepping in and out of a room, It left Damon restless and Irritated. He told himself it was chemical, Temporary and Irrelevant. Hannah filled the silence easily, brought reports before he asked, Updated him on patrol routes, Sat beside him during elder briefings, touched him often enough to ground him. “You can’t let guilt weaken you,” she said one afternoon when they were alone in his office. Damon’s jaw tightened. “I’m not guilty of anything.” “You keep going to the back of the staff quarters and watching his window almost every night.” She replied slowly and carefully enough to not anger him. Damon looked at her then irritation clearly visible on his face. “It’s non of your business.” He snapped. Hannah’s expression remained soft, but there was calculation behind her eyes. She leaned closer. “You’re Alpha,” she whispered. “You can’t fracture for someone who already chose rejection.” Kyrian’s decision echoed in his mind again, I accept suppression and rejection, No hesitation, No trembling. He had looked Damon in the eye when he said it and there had been no feelings there, Only exhaustion. That memory scraped under Damon’s ribs. “I don’t care about him.” Damon said flatly. Hannah’s fingers tightened around his hand. “Good.” Kyrian spent his days working around the pack house alone. It’s been 5 days since he got back to the pack house and everyone kept on avoiding him. He didn’t know if it was because of him or the guards following him up and down. The bond still existed just not enough to cause problems anymore but the Elders didn’t want to take any chances that’s why he had guards assigned to watch more like monitor him. The guards followed at a distance as he moved through the forest behind the pack house gathering herbs and spices for the kitchen. He had been pushing himself so hard to distract himself from everything going on around him, the stress left his muscles burning. He pushed harder than necessary. He needed to feel something real like the way his whole body ached with cramps. The suppression had dulled the emotional chaos but replaced it with something colder, clarity edged with resentment. He remembered begging in the cells, he remembered starving himself, he remembered pressing his forehead to stone and whispering he’s not coming. That humiliation lived in his bones now, the pack watched him differently, Some with sympathy, some with discomfort, anger and judgment, Some with awe. He no longer looked breakable, he looked sharpened. On the sixth evening after suppression, Kyrian crossed paths with Damon in the courtyard. Hannah was at Damon’s side, as always. Kyrian paused. So did Damon. The air between them felt thinner than before. Not painful, Just strained. “ you look healthy and good,” Damon said evenly. Kyrian’s expression didn’t shift. “Thank you Alpha.” he replied. Hannah stepped subtly closer to Damon, fingers brushing his wrist. Kyrian noticed. Damon noticed that Kyrian noticed and the smallest flicker of something. Irritation and jealousy passed through him before he crushed it. “You’re free to move within the territory,” Damon said. “Don’t mistake that for freedom and don’t even think about leaving the pack again.” Kyrian’s mouth curved faintly. “I won’t.” He walked past them without another word. And Damon felt the absence like a physical withdrawal. That night, Damon stood beneath Kyrian’s window again. He didn’t know when it became habit, he told himself it was observation, Security nothing more. A shadow moved inside. It was Kyrian. Damon’s chest tightened unexpectedly, remembered another window, another house. A younger version of himself standing outside his childhood home after his father’s funeral. Watching lights through glass while his mother sat alone inside, refusing to cry in front of the pack. Strength was isolation, Love was liability and he had learned that early. But Kyrian was different, he had loved openly once. Had spoken of a mother who sang while cooking, Of a brother lost in a border raid, Of a pack that fractured under corruption. Kyrian had known loss too, but he hadn’t let it turn him cold. Until now. Damon turned away from the window and walked back to his room. Hannah waited in his chambers, she had begun staying later, then staying overnight. Not in his bed at first, Just lingering around and Offering her support, Comfort and he allowed it because it was easier than confronting the quiet shift inside himself whenever Kyrian’s name surfaced. Hannah brushed Damon’s hair back as he sat at the edge of his bed. “You did what was necessary,” she murmured, He didn’t respond. She kissed his temple. “You saved him.” That word lingered. “Saved.” Kyrian didn’t look saved, he looked free and Damon wasn’t sure which unsettled him more.
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