Remembering Lily

Say Her Name

I was just finished with my class and I'm fixing my things right now before going to my office when I heard footsteps from outside. It sounded like someone was coming towards me.

I sighed. Now, it's me who is getting paranoid or obsessive. The constant stares from Stephanie have made me think like this.

I hurriedly finished fixing my things when I heard someone's voice. "Hi," Adam was peeking at the door. He looked so casual with his light blue polo and pants. He is even smiling at me like we've known each other for ages. There was a dimple on his face that even makes him look friendlier. I couldn't doubt why our fellow teachers are friendly over him already. Totally different from my case. Also far from the irritating face I was expecting from Stephanie.

"Oh. I thought you were someone else." I relaxed and slowly grabbed my things. I was trying to subtly even my breathing.

"Need help?" He asked as he entered the classroom.

"All good."

We were walking side by side. I looked at him suspiciously. Surely, he didn't just know by chance that my last class was finished and he didn't just happen to pass by the classroom. He was bringing nothing and the classes were almost done. "Do you know my schedule?"  I asked because he seems like a creep right now.

Oh, I might know a thing or two about stalking, and as much as he looks kind, sweet and innocent, he is giving major creep vibes here.

I swear, if he tells me some bullshit, I'd tell him to cut himself out. I'm too busy with my plans and I don't have time to hang out with a stalker.

He didn't speak so I was ready to tell him my version of the truth. Old Lily could never tell anyone to go away. I used to be timid and just expects the best out of people. I wasn't just hoping for goodness. I really put people on the pedestal and look where it got me. I discovered life would be too short for the nonsense that didn't matter.

"I did… actually." He said before I could tell my piece. "I hope you didn't mind. I just asked Adie- do you know her?" I didn't know what he was trying to say but I nodded because I know Adie. Of course, he made friends already. Now, I'm wondering why is he hanging out with me when he can be with his 'other friends who are far more interesting and had better and more real stories to tell than me?

"I asked her when's your last class but that's all, I promise. I hope I didn't give off so much of that creepy stalker vibe."

I was thinking of ways to shut him out just a moment ago and here I am, suddenly laughing. How did I go from expecting the worst of him to suddenly finding him cute and clueless? "You did and I don't think you can blame me."

I didn't notice that we have arrived already at the office's door. Adam opened the door for me which I thought was really nice considering he is just a stranger. "Thank you," I said.

No one seemed to mind when we entered except for that one pair of piercing stares. Stephanie immediately looked away and for all I know was just pretending to type on her laptop. 

I thought I was too consumed with revenge but she seems more intense than I am right now. I don't get her at all. I mean, I know it means nothing but I'm literally with another man who is not connected to her in any way. Even that is bothering her? Is she bothered by my existence? I was just taking a break but her stress is ongoing. Poor Stephanie… too bad my sympathy for her paranoia died with me.

"Lily," Adam called and it was automatic for my face. It doesn't even feel weird to be called by my name but I noticed every head on the office tilted and is now facing me with confusion.

"I'm sorry, I was too loud." He coolly apologizes with a hint of embarrassment on his face.

I want to laugh at his innocence. He obviously has no idea what's going on here. Some eyes withdrew their glare but I know they are still listening. It has been a long time since they last heard my name, I guess. They must have forgotten about this poor worker's name.

"I'm sorry for the confusion. The new guy decided to call me by my first name." I announced, looking at those whose looks are confused by the sudden calling of my name. They must have forgotten that I'm still Lily. It's sort of funny looking at their horrified faces. I'm glad I was able to live again and see this. So, I guess I need to cleanse the horror that comes with my name, like as if my name brought some curse after the last time incident.

I don't think anyone but Stephanie cared really. They were horrified but I guess it's because of the momentary shock.

“Ah, I would just like to ask you if you want to have dinner together. Of course, you can say no if you want. I just-”

“That would be lovely, Adam.” I smiled.

I know I shouldn’t have said yes but it’s just that… I thought of the perfect place where we can have dinner.

"Why is he calling you Lily?"

"For the love of god! Stephanie, can you please stop ambushing me!" I was touching my chest from the surprise questioning. I just walked out of the door and was ready to go home but of course, that is almost impossible. It seems like Stephanie's last mission for her day was to piss me off so badly.

"Are you using Lily's name now?" Her eyes were so wide it almost didn't look like her. If I were to be honest, it scared me a bit because she's acting crazier than ever.

"You seemed to have forgotten that that's my name too. I remember distinctly announcing that to anyone. What have you and your imagination thought this time?" I smirked, challenging her. I would never back out of a fight with Stephanie. She's an easy enemy who thinks the same about me but my prior knowledge about everything is enough to make me win. She lost this battle already and she just didn't realize that yet.

"You're using that to get Yohan, don't you? You've planned this well, Ellie. You're copying Lily aren't you?"

I really want to laugh. I want to cry tears of laughter at how desperate and scared she sounded. I may have been a bit insecure but I know I held this power and I wasn't talking about me as Ellie… I'm referring to myself as Lily. I didn't have to be a ghost to haunt anyone.

“Is there any problem here?”

Again, Adam came at the perfect moment. Ever since his arrival, it’s almost like he’s the person who blocks Stephanie’s attack which of course, is an advantage for me because he serves as my shield.

“We have to go, Stephanie.”

I smiled at her before leaving with Adam.

“Do you know any restaurants here?”

“Yup. I can tell you where.”

With Adam… Well, it’s too early to tell if I should leave him out of the picture. For now, I thought I could have some fun.