OWNED by a POSSESSIVE GREEK

Ika Apatnapu’t Apat- Cry

“What the h*ll?!” Napahawak sya sa armrests at napaayos ng upo. Kunot noo at mabagsik ang mukha nito na akala mo ay may aawayin.

I raised my chin as I looked at him and even raised my eyebrow at him.

“Who the f*cking h*ll is that?!” he hissed.

I shrugged.

“You don’t have to know, it doesn’t matter.. kasi nga diba, it’s not important..so I don’t have to share it with you!” I said sarcastically.

His face darkened and his jaw clenched.

“Cassiopeia Everleigh.” Mariin nyang tawag sa buong pangalan ko. “Tell me who the guy is..”

I shook my head.

”I’m just trying to make a point Silas, that’s another topic.”

He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his now. When he opened his eyes, he combed his hsir with his fingers.

He is frustrated, and so am I.

Silence enveloped us for a couple of minutes, as if both don’t know what to say.

I took a deep breath, this petty fight is draining me..and him being away with no proper communication is not helping. Sa dalawang buwan na nasa Greece sya ay wala akong maayos na tulog and my mind has never been at ease.

The feeling I have inside is far from being at peace.

“Silas.” I started. “I was thinking..maybe we should take it slow..” bulong ko sabay baba ng mga kamay sa binti. I played with my fingers.

This is not an easy decision for me but for my mental health.. I must do this.

Selfish? Siguro..pero ito lang ang nakikita kong paraan para matahimik ako.

“What do you mean?” He suddenly looks confused. His brows furrowed, his eyes looks worried..

I sighed and looked away. Hindi ko sya kayang tingnan ng diretso, I don’t even want to see his reaction because I might change my mind. And I can’t change my mind, I should stick with my decision. This is for the both of us.

“Let’s..cool off..” I said with a heavy heart. Rinig ko ang marahas nyang pag hinga.

“What are you talking about?!” Mariin nyang tanong. “Why do we need to cool off?! I already explained everything to you. And I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you about Sancha, it wasn’t my intention-“

“Silas.” I cut him off, I looked at him kahit mahirap, kahit ayoko dahil gusto kong makita nya na seryoso ako. And when I saw his face, I almost take back what I have said, I almost gave in..pain is evident on his face and I am the reason why he is hurting now. “We are not breaking up..we just need to cool off-“

“There’s no need to cool off! Tell me everything that you want, I’ll do it, just not cool off or break up because I’ll never give that to you!”

“We need to do this-“

“Is this about your suitor?! Do you need time to think if you like him already-“

“No! What are you talking about?!” halos pasigaw kong sabi.

“Then what?! Tell me! Make me understand why you want to cool off?!” his face is red now, the veins in his neck are now visible. He looks angry but at the same time he looks like he is still trying to hold himself.

I bit my lips and swallowed hard. My eyes are starting to water. Hindi rin naman madali oara saakin ito, pero kailangan ko ito.. kailangan namin.

“I’m sorry Silas..” I started. “But I didn't sign for this. I am not ready sign up a long distance relationship.”

His lips parted. He looks surprised.

“This is just for the meantime, Love..” he said in pleading voice.

“That meantime can be three or four months..or maybe more right?” I gave him a sad smile. I am not stupid, with what’s happening with their company, I doubt it can be resolved immediately. “You’ll be busier and because of our time difference it will still be difficult for us to communicate like what happened in the past weeks.”

“I’ll make time and exert more effort I promise..baby please.” he is almost begging.

I inhaled and shook my head. I cannot be swayed, or else pareho lang kaming mahihirapan.

“And Sancha is there-“

“I won’t talk to her again if that’s the only-“

“Silas that's not the point. I trust you, I do. But I don’t trust the situation..they might force you to treat her better or things like that. You may not give in this time because you know that it will hurt our relationship but Silas.. I won’t have peace of mind. Knowing that she’s there..and her family is friends with your family and…” I inhaled harshly, nag taas baba ang balikat ko sa marahas na paghinga. And a tear fell down from my eye, this time was Silas who inhaled harshly.

“Baby..”

“I can’t even sleep properly at night. I am always worried..I can’t focus at school. This whole situation is stressing me out.” my voice cracked another set if tears fell down from my eyes that I wiped immediately.

“Please dont cry..” he sounded as if he’s the one in pain.

“Your family needs you Silas. You also need to take care of yourself, I know that you're also having a hard time splitting your time with the company, your study, your family and me..”

“Yes, this is hard for me, that's why I need you now..you’re my rest baby..you’re the only one who can take away my exhaustion from a busy and stressing day.. so please..stay with me, I need you..” tuluyan na akong naiyak sa pakiusap nya. I had to cover my mouth to lessen the sound of my sobs, my shoulders are shaking already because if my cries.

I know that he needs me, and I felt bad that I feel like I am abandoning him at the time when he needed me most..pero..paano naman ako?

“Agape mou..” he voice also broke and when I looked at him, there are tears on his face that almost broke me. I never thought that time will come and I’ll see him cry.

And seeing him cry hurts me too.

”S-silas.. please listen to me. We need thus..” pakiusap ko.

”Agape Mou, can’t you hold on a little tighter to me? Please don’t give up easily..”he whike shaking his head. His tured eyes are already red. Looking at him now, I just realized that he lost weight, his cheeks sunk.

I want to cry more. Seeing him like this is making me feel weak..I wish I can hug him and tell him that every thing will be alright.

I wiped my tears away as I composed myself, I know that he is hurting too while seeing me crying. I cleared the lump in my throat and sat straight.

“This is not just for me Silas. This is for you too.” I tried to sound convincing. “Focus on the company problem and your dad.. your mom needs moral support too..and when all your problem there is solved, then come back home. Cone back home to me..hmnn?” I gave him a sad smile as I tried so hard not to let a tear fall down on my cheek. “Focus on your problem there so you can come back home soon..I promise..I’ll be waiting for you.” I bit my lips as I stop myself ftom sobbing. Silas cried too while nodding his head.

The mighty Silas is crying, and that’s because of me.