When I Was Your Woman

Get out of my house, my face and my life.

After 3 days, baby Leigh-anne already discharged from the hospital. Racchi give Rusty some more money for the child's daily medication. "Tell me when the medicines already ran out so I can send you money for it." Racchi sends message to Rusty.

Friday night. Racchi arrives at her apartment after work. She calls her Mom. Lily Jackson Miller- 73 years old, weak and suffering from diseases for oldies.

"Mom, how are you?Have you taken your medicines for your high blood pressure and your arthritis? How about your vitamins?"

"I don't wanna drink my medicines anymore. It's just waste of money. Racchi, I am already old, no matter how many medicines I am going to swallow, my body says I cannot do this for long anymore. So please, save those money for yourself. You're not getting any younger. You supposedly have savings for now."

"Mom, don't say that. You are the reason for all my hard works. I wan't you to stay with me and witness all the days of my life. How can I go on if you are not there?"

"Racchi, my daughter, how kind of you. But it is about time to think about yourself, your happiness. All the days of your life, you keep on prioritizing me and your sisters. Leave something for yourself. I know we become your burden already".

"No Mom.This is my only happiness- to take care of you and to support your needs. I am fine with all of this. I may not be at your side always but you and our family are the most important things and people in my life right now. So please, stay healthy for me."

"My daughter, I am always praying that someday, you will find a man who will love you more than I can. And he will take care of you the way you take care of us."

"Thank you Mom. I will drop this call already. You go to sleep now. I will be preparing for my dinner. I love you."

As soon as their phone call ended, Racchi is in deep thoughts again. Is she really fine with everything? Or is she just trying to be fine and trying to look fine? Whatever it is, all she knows is the feeling of emptiness she felt inside. All she have to do is to release a deep sigh for all that she went through.

Then a flashback of memory came to her mind. When she was still 25 and in love.

"Do you really have to go?"Racchi asked Xander- her four years beau.

"Yes, I have to. This has been my dream - to finish my studies overseas. To become the best pulmonologist." Xander answered.

"How about me?" Racchi's tears are starting to fall from her lonely eyes.

"I don't know. If you don't like me going abroad, we can break up. I can't slip this once in a lifetime opportunity. My sister works so hard for me to go there because she knows I want it too. I can't choose you for now."

"Just like that? Is that how easy for you to erase all that we have? Did I really mean something to you? Or I just mean nothing all this time?

"You mean something to me. But I need to grow. I need to fulfill my dreams. I want a good life for my future family."

"Your future family? And you don't consider me as your future? Why? Because I came from a broken and poor family?

"I'm sorry. I have to go. I need to prepare for my flight tomorrow."

And just like that, Xander left her. Left her with a heavy and shattered heart. For four years of being together, she is being loyal, caring and supportive girlfriend. She kept her patience in everything. When Xander made a promise to date her but did not happen, she forgives him even if Xander did not say sorry and even if she finds out the reason why he did not show up. She choose to love and fight for him even if she knows that his family is against their relationship. She chooses pain as long as she is being with him even if she only sees a little love, attention and time from him. Because she believes that Xander will learn to love her with all his heart and fight for her and that one day, his family will finally accept her.

"But it did not happen. And it won't happen" she said to herself while tears are falling down.

She fell asleep while crying her heart out.

"No. I did not push her. I did not push your Mom. I only come here to tell you something about me, about us before you leave". Slap. Xander slapped Racchi. "How dare you hurt my Mom. No matter what you gonna say, it won't change my decision of leaving. And seeing from what happened now, I did a good decision, to break up and to leave you because you are a criminal. You are shameless. Get out and do not let me see you again. If something bad happens to Mom, I won't forgive you even afterlife. Get out of my house, my face and my life."

Racchi wakes up from a nightmare. A nightmare that keeps on visiting her. One of the most painful thing that happened in her life. When the man she loves told her to stay away from him forever. Because of the thing that she is not guilty of and a thing that she cannot do no matter how painful and difficult things may be. But Xander did not believe her. Xander believes his own truth and not the whole truth.