Her Rejection's Revenge

CHAPTER FIFTEEN: THE NEW RECRUIT

After that information, it was all about growing up. There were no more tears, and the pain was a faithful mate, not leaving my side for even one second. After a few months, I got so used to living with it that I carried it with me with devoted diligence like a faithful companion.

What good would it serve me to rehash the past when my own parents had made their choice? I no longer considered them as my own. There was only Zendaya, and I would die before endangering her. That was why I disconnected the call and crushed my SIM card to no longer be tempted to call her, them, anyone from my past.

Gradually, the anger curled hot and unstoppable inside me replacing the pain which I had become used to, like a blazing inferno which wanted to consume me. It was a passive emotion that I was experiencing because I buried myself in books and physical exercise to escape it.

When I believed that I had it under control, it was at my expense that I discovered that it had only been a volcano building up inside me waiting for a crack to flow out in the open.

That c***k in my armor happened when I visited Kuromi, well Miriam the following week. She looked marginally better than the last time I saw her, and she smiled easily at me as soon as I came inside.

It instantly pissed me off. How could she keep her usual sunny demeanor after everything that happened to her? Ever since I came here, I have seen at least ten new recruits, and they all went on with their recluse lives serving the rogue pack with passive submission. Like it was totally normal for them to be uprooted from their homes and families for whatever reason.

“I’m sorry for embarrassing you the other day,” she began in a trembling voice, and I placed the water bowl with a thud on the cabinet near her. “I really believed you saved me in the forest. It was the only thing I could remember when I woke up.”

I didn’t respond as I prepared the materials needed for the session. Both Dr. Kapadia and Dr. Selim were tending to another serious patient and had asked me to replace them for her therapeutic session. The effects of the medications must have caused some serious damage to her brains for her to imagine me before even meeting me. Or it was proof that her brains were muddled.

Thousands of questions burnt on the tip of my tongue, but I was reluctant to let them spill out. Engaging was not my cup of tea anymore – the less I knew, the better I was. So, I kept mum as I walked in her direction and signaled her to lie on her back.

“Anyway, I feel it’s a good thing I ended up here. I like the atmosphere around. Everyone seems so nice and cooperative.”

I closed my eyes for a second to regain my balance at her stupid statement, before I focused on the task at hand. There was no point debating with her optimism.

With gentle movements, I started to massage the back of her neck with precise repetitive actions. The key was to apply enough pressure to manipulate the bones back in their place. That was what was used on me when I just got here – I got to know about it when I assisted D. Kapadia to tend to other patients.

“Why are you so tensed and quiet?” Kuromi kept asking, and the flow of my movements was disturbed by her comment. If only she would just shut up.

“I’m not here to make friends,” I answered tartly.

Miriam almost turned around to look at me, but my hands kept her face firmly in place. “Speaking to someone hardly qualifies as initiating friendship. Is that what you would call it?”

I scoffed in derision. “Isn’t it how it starts? We talk, then establish a connection. Within hours, we find ourselves telling each other our deepest secrets?” I snickered with a crooked smile.

“Would that be so bad? Sharing our deepest secrets? I heard that sharing grief made it easier for the victims.”

“Then, you are wrong! I am no victim,” I shouted at her angrily and released the hold on her neck. I was done with her nonsense. “If you want to wear your rose-tinted glasses and view this place as some kind of sanctuary, you’re most welcome. But know that even here, people will turn on you. People will betray you everywhere you go. But you won’t give a sh*t even then, will you? You will just continue to play ostrich in the sand because you’re too stupid! Well, you know what? Keep me away from your bullsh*t!!!”

Alright, that was uncalled for. I regretted the words the moment they were out and realized belatedly that my anger was not directed at her. Kuromi was indeed a victim. I was very shaken up with the news that they were getting married. Like nothing had happened.

I watched the green eyes color with hurt as Kuromi hitched in a breath at my harsh words. The fact that I was enraged with her sunny disposition had nothing to do with her. My anger and resentment was more directed to them being so passive about their abuse.

Although I didn’t get involved anymore, I heard bits and pieces to know enough. Everyone who came here had a sob story. They had all suffered a tremendous abusive past, but once they were settled in Neverlands, they seemed to accept it like nothing had happened. How could they move on when their abusers were living in peace? There was sone gnawing dark emotion inside me which refused to accept that sordid unfair reality.

Like with Miriam here. She was actually thinking of settling down as a rogue when she could be so much more. Did the abusers had such power over them to make them no longer believe in their worth?

There was a time when I was made so worthless that I questioned even my existence. I was so grateful for being chosen that every hidden insult was considered a blessing. I even allowed that man to m…. I shuddered in revulsion as my eyes clouded with memories of him touching me again.

It had never been pleasant, and I thought that if I allowed him to molest me, I would finally please him. Self-disgust filled me at my own stupidity.

“Kitty? Kitty?” somebody was calling out a weird name, but I didn’t snap out of my daze as I couldn’t place the word. All I could see was Braxton trapping my head against a pillow before penetrating from behind without any regards to my own pleasure. It hadn’t been rape - to my own shame. It had been pure manipulation and abuse which I had suffered only because of my own mistakes.

A hand touched my forehead and I shivered as the cold feeling seeped through my skin and I snapped to reality.

Green eyes homed into mine filled with the same reflection of agony and bitterness. It took me a moment to realize that I was in the Neverlands amidst rogues with the same pitiful fate as me.

“H…how can you live with yourself?” I croaked in a rough voice which I couldn’t recognize as my own.

Miriam frowned at me with a perplexed frown. “I…I don’t understand,” she replied in the same anguished whimper.

“Don’t you blame yourself for the way they treated you? Don’t you feel that you could have done better? That you could have saved yourself from this fate had you done things otherwise?” I asked, for the first time letting the depth of my pain showing. I had managed to bottle up all my feelings inside so far.

There was a moment of loud silence before Miriam sank back to the bed with a fatigued smile. “I am an Alpha’s daughter. I was supposed to be the next in-line for the throne,” she began in a dull tone. I snuck in a deep breath as my heart protested against the sob story which I knew would be coming. “My father was the most respected and powerful man in our pack. Until I turned eighteen.”

I stayed soundless in consideration to her pain, but my silence spurred her to go on. Goosebumps filled me at the thought that the frail little girl was actually an Alpha – a freaking Alpha.

“My wolf turned out to be strong. Very strong,” she said unexpectedly, and I blinked in surprise for I was not expecting that.

How did she end up battered in such a destitute manner if her wolf was strong? Who would have dared illtreat her?

Her chest heaved with so much effort like there was a huge burden buried there. When her green eyes turned to face me, there was some bitterness and self-mockery in her glistening specters as she brushed aside the unshed tears with resolution.

“But you’re not here to listen to my sob story,” she sniped derisively. “I mean what if we become friends in the process, right?” she delivered sarcastically. I was dying to know more of her story, but I bit my lips to refrain myself from expressing my curiosity. I had misjudged her badly.

“So, to answer your question, no. There was nothing I could do to prevent this from happening,” she signaled to herself, and I looked at her deeply for the first time. She was not weak like I had initially assumed. Despite her small physiognomy, she seemed to bequeath a strength from inside. She looked away from me with clenched jaw staring straight ahead. “Unlike you, I don’t mop around in self-pity.”

Her words cut deeper than they should, and I fled from the room like the devil himself was after me. What was I thinking?

For the rest of her recovery, I avoided her like plague, or visited only in the capacity of the doctor’s assistant. She royally ignored me as well, we were not compatible with each other it seemed.

The day of the wedding came, and I sat in my room with a bottle of Tequila. It wasn’t like me to shun from the responsibilities given to me by the rogues, but that day was exceptional. I was halfway down the bottle when there was a timid knock on the door.

“Kitty, is that you?” Miriam’s voice sounded, and I was hammered enough to smile at her broadly as she entered my room.

“My, my,” she uttered in deep wonder. “A smile instead of a scowl. Be still my heart.” Then, she glanced as the half empty bottle and understanding dawned. Without a word, she crawled right in front of me on the floor on her fours and stared at me with her pretty green eyes holding a serious note.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Why are you here?” I barked between gritted teeth, reaching for the sanctuary of the bottle but she was faster. Her small hands sneaked in one single blow to snatch it well before my sloshy movements could follow.

“Mama Juanita is looking for you. It’s your turn to clean the kitchen today.”

I growled savagely as I frowned to focus. I had forgotten. I was not that drunk, was I? I had only taken one or two swigs at the bottle.

Of course, I’d forgotten as other things were on my mind for the past days. I had been dreading this moment, where I would be sloshed in a corner while Beatrice would be living my dreams. I groaned in pain and reached blindly for the bottle.

“I think you’ve had enough. I can switch with you for today. I’ll take care of the cleaning, but please make sure we can have a conversation when I’m back.”

I supposed I should be grateful – nobody would have traded his or her workday at the camp since everyone of us were given our quotas which made us physically drained at the end of the day. I was too drunk to protest and lifted a thumbs up to Miriam as she left me with a shake of her head.

“Kitty? Kitty? Wake up,” somebody was shaking me, and I awoke with a jerk, cursing immediately as the abrupt movement created a terrible headache. I held my head to wait for the pain to pass and when it did, I looked up at the hazy face in front of me.

“Bee, don’t do this to me. Don’t marry him. Please,” I murmured into the dark green eyes frowning at me with displeasure and disapproval. “I love him. I still love him despite everything.”