Chapter 1

1883 Words
My story is quite different from many stories you've heard. I mean, my story is the complete opposite of freedom and peace. Granted, it's filled with love adrenaline. Sometimes I thought love might conquer my past. I don't know if it does. I never felt it. Never had someone love me or sees the real me just the way every human deserves. Have you ever wondered what shadows are? I did all the time. After losing my father, I finally figured a shadow is formed when something blocks a source of light. Odd, because I am not a source of light, I never brought happiness to anyone. I've been a shadow all my life, just wandering around the universe, trying to make it to tomorrow and then tomorrow, continuously. And honestly, I am not only a shadow to the public but also myself. Be it all dark; I'll be stuck forever, just as if it should be all bright, I'd still be blocked by the cruel world and its mighty people. *** Holding out a tiny star pendant that he just took out from the trash bin, he worriedly asks. "Jazzy, since when did your necklace became a trash occupant?" Sighing softly, I answer my big brother's question. "Trust me. She's so much enjoying her new home." Narrowing his gaze, he looks back into the tiny kitchen trash bin and makes a sick face. "Fairly, I don't think she will like sharing space with different sort of garbage from various headquarters." I let out a small laugh at his joke. Of course, I don't think my necklace belongs to the trash bin, but I think it's high time to let go. "I just think it's time..." I paused, thinking whether I've made the right decision. "It's for the best." I stuttered. "It's for the best," He repeats my words, with an assuring smile on his lips. I know he's not pushing for some reason, though Jimmy never presses on things. Mostly, he doesn't make me do something I don't want to. In that case, I crowned him the best friend I ever had and will ever have. Apparently, since I've been a lonely child growing up and nothing's changed about me up til now. Mom was holding a box you would doubt she could handle when she began to complain from the kitchen back door. "Tell me you both are done packing because the truck will be here soon. I can't pay any extra charges for delaying." Our parents married for love as mom won't shut up about it. They were of different ethnicities. Blinded by love for each other, she had said. When mom was American, dad was African American. She told us about the difficulties they went through together and how her parents didn't like the marriage. Well, they thought he put her through a lot when in reality, she did. Mom had said; dad is the kind of man who carries the blame even when he is innocent. And that's the reason why right now, he's no more in our lives. The combination of our parents made us mixed-race, which I am very proud of. Jimmy and I were light-skinned. My hair had always been lengthy and curly, and brown. I've never attempt straightening or styling it any other way. Jimmy's isn't curly, though; his hair was soft and straight even though he trims his hair every week. Among the habits he inherits from our dad, I suppose. Although our eyes were the same, a dove chocolate color just as our noses were much like moms. We have different lips. Mine was a little plump and pouty while Jimmy's lips were thin. Jimmy had always love sports; so he is a build-up kind, with chiseled and defined muscles, no girl can refuse. He is also tall and can be tough when it comes to protecting those he loves. To be precise, I'm five feet five inches and a little curvy. Yes, back to what mom had just said. Jimmy only needed a glance at me to understand I still had some work to do. "Mmm-mm sure." He crookedly answers for both of us. And grab my hand, urging: "Let's go do some check-up," We followed the staircase to my bedroom. The door was decorated with some girl's empowerment posters. We walked in, and Jimmy provided me with some help organizing my scattered belongings, and we gathered and packed everything in storage boxes before carrying them downstairs to make sure the boxes weren't mixed with his or mom's for the sake of later. By the time the truck arrived, everything was out in place, and finally, the house became vacant. The house where I grew up. The place where my life should be. The house I thought was home. I stroll around the empty house for the last time. In my room, I found myself imagining little me laying on the medium bed while my dad read from the bedtime stories books on the bookshelf. The feeling is something I would never have any more, but I'll always be grateful for the memories he left me with. I slowly close the door to the empty room and head down the hall to the grand staircase where mom and Jimmy had been calling me. Our empty living room came to view—not our living room anymore, though. It now belongs to some happy family who brought it from us. In that living room, I did my homework, I'd lay on the gray couch with my foot on dad's lap, and Jimmy on the orange armchair. We would watch the games on Saturday. While Mom and Jimmy were always against our favorite team, dad and I had enjoyed watching their team lose. I, Jasmine Grant, will try and forget these memories. With the little I have left inside of me, I will wear that smile I used to before I lost everything. The drive was two days. Mom and Jimmy take turns even when Jimmy insists on doing the driving. They ask me to rest throughout the ride. Rest they said, but it's the word I can't define anymore. The term (rest) is what I kept hearing for years and didn't find it working for me. We had stopped for refills, restroom and snacks a couple of times. And mom took the wheels until we finally arrive at our destination: our new destination, Staten Island, NY. With my head resting against the window, my gaze fixated outside the car, yet I can't tell you I grasp anything about this new place, that is our new neighborhood. My eyes are open, but my mind is farther away from this little car. Then suddenly, my body jolts with intense force, crashing my forehead against the backside of the passenger's seat. "Oh my god..." Mom exclaimed. Her voice was distant at first. I blink rapidly, shaking my head slowly to reduce the abrupt headache. What just happened? I looked up and found mom's terrifying eyes studying me. Her hand was on my shoulder, squeezing lightly. That's when I realized we had an accident. "Are y'all okay?" She asked. Her voice was shaky. She seems scared. Jimmy turned to check on me too. There's a slight bruise on his lip. Grateful, we are alive and healthy. I nod at mom. "I am fine... what was that?" I questioned, looking through the windshield. "I don't know. We must have..." She didn't get to finish when she got interrupted by some harsh thumping from our car hood, which suddenly turned into pounding. What the hell? Jimmy quickly jumped out of the car before mom, and I followed behind. "What the actual f**k?" A malicious and desperate voice barks at us. "What? what do you mean? that you bumped into us?" Jimmy yells back at the other car driver. "I bump into you?" The stranger sarcastically laughs. Mom was quick to grab my wrist in her want hand, knowing how afraid I might be. And actually, I was. "Your lights were off." She defended. The stranger laughs even cruelly, like that of a wizard. "Oh, I see! so some old b***h is the driver, right? I couldn't guess any better." Striding forward, Jimmy jerks the driver's collar and presses him against his car. "Shut up, asshole. You could've caused damage in there. My mom and sister were in that f*****g car." "You call that a car? All I see is trash with wheels and your old woman enjoying the dirt." Said the rude stranger who was clearly bragging about his ride, a low blue car. It didn't take a second after he closed his big mouth when Jimmy's fist collided with his jaw. Intense. I step back, pulling mom with me. But the woman despise violence, so she panicked. "Don't." Immediately, she let go of my wrist to pull Jimmy away from the stranger. I stand dead in my track. My legs stiffened to the ground as I took in the event. Fear rippled through me. "You will pay for this." The arrogant driver shouts as mom tugs me by the arm, back to our car. "Or maybe we should report your attitude to the cops." Jimmy tries to walk back to the angry driver. "Yes, that will be extremely fun. maybe I could report your barbaric behavior too." The voice holds the chills of a monster. It was startling. Before settling in the backseat, I risk one look just as a car passes through the road. And it was enough to flash me the angry face that almost caused the life of my entire family. Messy dark blonde hair, deep green eyes and bleeding lips. The armored anger in his callous deep eyes made me turn quickly as his eyes met mine. My brother's hand suddenly rests on the small of my back. He opened the door for mom first and then for me before he took the drive this time. A while later, we arrive at our new home. I think 'house' because home is where the heart is, and I am sure I left my heart back in Seattle. The truck with our stuff seems to have arrived earlier before us, as it was parked right in front of the building, our building. The street is polar of where a bankrupt family should stay. But even due to the fact that we have low savings, mom will never let us stay in a neighborhood that might frustrate us. Our new house is a small-story building—obviously the smallest and the institutional in the neighborhood. I mean, from the view of the opposite houses putting ours in the middle, you will take ours as a junk store or something. Funny right? I know. From the porch, I waited impatiently for mom or Jimmy to unlock the entrance door. At that moment, I care less to help with anything. I have this weird headache. I'm sure my organs need nothing but some peaceful rest. The moment the door was unlocked, I slumped down on the wooden floor while the truck men transferred our stuff into the small compartment. The rest of the night, I remain in my position. Quietly seated until I doze off on the floor
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