Unwanted by Him ( on hold )

THE PAIN

Presently I'm preparing for dinner with mom helping me.

When we are finished mom called all of them to eat. After finishing the dinner which was in comfortable silence. I went to dad to give him his tablets.

Then I started to head to our bedroom. Our. I don't know why my heart is beating so fast. It’s not like it’s the first time that him and I are going to share the same room. I'm nervous and when I’m nervous I play with a small circular shaped red stone hooked with the thin gold chain which was around my neck. It was my mother, my father gifted me on my 12th birthday. I have fallen in love with it as soon as I saw it on my neck from then it never left my neck.

I slowly opened the door and peeked inside to make sure he is already there or not but there was no one. With a relief I went inside quickly and went to the closet and to change into my night cloths faster so I can go to sleep before he come.

Again, quickly thinking that maybe he will be here soon and I quietly run to the bathroom and shut the door behind faster. Still facing the door, I took off my one-piece dress by unzipping it from back and let it fall to my feet with my night cloth between my teeth. And when I turned to throw the dress in a dirty cloths basket I screamed, covered myself with the cloths in my hands, blushed and turned around at the same time. Cause behind stood my husband with only a towel around his hips, with his arms crossed and a razor in his right hand standing in front if the mirror but towards my side an amused expression on his face.

" I-I "I started with my heart beating faster. But he cut me off. " If you wanted me so much you can just ask and no need to blush so much it’s not like I never seen you without cloths Bella and you too have already seen me so why this shy-ness huh? " he said with a sexy tone which made me close my eyes and turned redder in embarrassment.

" I didn’t know you were there " I went to open the door but he stopped me.

" you can change now anyway I am finished " he said and made a click noise which I think he kept the razor down and with that he left me.

" oh god I am so stupid " I muttered to myself and when to change into my long shirt that reached above my knees just enough to cover my shorts.

When I was back, he was already in bed on his side with only grey sweatpants seeing something on his phone.

I went to my side of bed and laid down. It was complete silence so I decide to speak.

"How are you feeling coming back here " I asked him which made him look up at me and took a deep breath. " fine " he said going back to his phone again. Now I started to play with my chain. " How was dinner " I asked." good " he said again going back to his phone. To which again I stared to play with my chain.

I heard a deep sigh from him. I keep quiet. " what is it Bella " he asked gazing into my eyes." I missed you " I said hold my breath and closed my eyes. When I opened my eyes to see him, he was angry and furious.

" what happened " I whispered. "what happened your saying me you missed me and asking me what happened" he yelled. "But it’s the truth I miss-." he cuts me off. " ohh stop this acting now will you ". " what are you talking about " I said in confusion.

" You left me when I most need you. I asked you to come with me but you denied and now you say you missed me that sounds stupid to me now Anabella " he yelled again.

" You know the reason that why I couldn't come " I said to him with blurry eyes.

" ohh stop with that bull s**t " he said. " You know I couldn't leave dad in that state when he needed me" I said with the rage filled in me. "you think that I don’t care about my father. He was alright I talked with the doctors they said he was better. And even I too needed you but where were you that time huh?" by saying that he left the room.

By this I felt like I had my whole body go numb. I couldn't move not even a bit. The pain I was feeling in my heart right now is so much that I couldn't breath and when I realized I took a deep breath and started to cry but stopped it. Saying I am stronger than this. I won’t cry because we had a fight.

I didn’t know I hurt him so much that he hated me now. He never used my full name not until he is really mad at me or someone else. And the way he spoke to me was like filled with hatred and longing.

I should have gone with him but I did it for a reason. But he will never understand me. He thinks that I didn’t wanted to go with him, he was wrong I wanted to so badly go but I wouldn’t.

I wanted to scream so load that the pain will leave my chest and I did scream. But the pain was still there. At least the room is sound proof So no one can heard us or me.