Lost

Nadia (Ch. 3)

The screeching of tires, my mother's screaming, the RV swerves left then right. My dad does his best to right it, but it's a losing battle. Bracing myself, the truck slammed into us again. Screaming, I fell, out of my seat. Scrambling back on, "Are you okay Nadia," my dad hollers from the front.

"Yeah," I breathed, looking into my mother's eyes. Her fear mirrors my own. Sliding closer to me she wraps her arm around me.

"It's going to be okay, your father will get us out of here," glancing toward the front, "Right, love?"

"Of course, we are already starting to lose them," he says. Looking out the window, I can see that we are losing them. I few more turns and twists, are we can't see them at all.

"We need to ditch the RV," dad tells us. Helping him look for a campsite. Mom points to a sign showing one coming up. Heading to the back I grab the duffel bags with our clothes and paperwork. Walking back to the front I grab my knapsack under the table and fill it with some food, cash, burner phones, and the journal my mother gave me. When we get to the site, dad throws the car in park, bags in hand we rush out. Leaving the RV behind. Walking around for a bit I spot a jeep.

"Dad, mom, there's a jeep," I tell them. Squeezing my shoulder dad runs over to it. Making sure no one is around we all get in, its just our luck the owner left the keys inside. Starting it, we leave the campsite. The sky is getting darker, but I know my father won't stop until we get to his friend's cabin. He's overly concerned, and mom is too frightened. Watching the trees pass by, I think about the last few days. They were filled with packing and family time, but last night was the date I promised Tobias. He's father lifted the ban on us, informing my dad that we were free to go on our vacation and hours later Tobias showed up to take me to dinner.

Looking at him hurt. He didn't even try to hide the fact he cheated on me. Just brushed it off like it was no big deal. I guess to him it wasn't, but I could never look at him the same. All our dates and time spent together tainted by what him and Rose did. After dinner, instead of bringing me home like he promised. He brought us to his house. Ugh! A chill runs down my spine as I remember the way his hands touched me. Rough and demanding, not the soft loving caresses they used to be. Even the way he kissed me was rough, my bottom lip was still split from his bite. But I endured it, because come morning we would be gone before anyone was awake.

Looking at my hands, I spot the bruises from him holding me down. Bile risesup my throat, a tear slides down my cheek. It was like he got off on being cruel to me now that I knew the truth. It didn't matter how much I pleaded and begged him to stop. He just continued to laugh and paw at me. His strength was greater than mine. All my fighting and pushing was futile. I felt like I was dying inside the more he touched, kissed, and fondled me.

Leaning my head on the window, I try to banish the images from my mind, but it's no use. I still ache from the pain he inflicted. He never loved me, everything about us was a lie. He is the devil and now I know the truth. About him, our relationship, everything.

Mom looks back at me to make sure I'm okay. Her tears haven't stopped since I came home bleeding and bruised. Didn't matter how many times I told her the blood on my hands wasn't mine. She still couldn't get my tear-stricken face out of her mind. Smiling at her, I turn back to the window. Looking at the stars, I try to decide if I should tell them everything. Not much was said when we left. My cuts, and bruises are almost completely gone. To the outside world its like last night never happened to me. I watch the flurries fall, tracking them with my finger as they slide down the glass.

The same hands that glowed with power, the moment something snapped inside me. Awakened me. I was no longer weaker than Tobias. I was stronger, faster, ruthless in my assault. Everything he did to me, I attacked him for it. Not stopping until he to begged me to stop. His arms and face bleeding from my nails slicing him up. My hands were still glowing when I got home. My mom kept crying the whole time, repeating that everything would be okay. Dad simply stated we had to leave at that moment. There was no time to waste, it's like he knew something or was waiting for this moment. By the time we entered Idaho around 6:30 this morning. Dad was calm enough to explain. I knew I was adopted. They never once pretended I wasn't.

I was stunned to find out my heritage. I always thought I was half shifter. With my wild streak and fondness for nature. It turns out I was wrong. I was really wrong. They told me I was half vampire, which explains the blood lust I felt when attacking Tobias. What shocked me the most, was when they told me I was also half Goddess. I thought they were joking, but the look my mother gave my father and the way he stared me down. I knew they weren't, but it didn't change the fact that goddesses were all but extinguished. No ones heard about them or seen them in decades.

Mom told me glowing hands, was just the first sign of goddess blood. That from now on my powers would only increase. To top it off, my vampire side will also get stronger. Since I was cut off from those sides of myself. They will be fighting for dominance until they either balance out or one dominates the other. Dad drilled into me that I want balance. If not, I'll always feel off kilter. That's the thing though, I don't feel off kilter. I feel whole. For the first time in ages, I feel the way I'm supposed to and instead of fearing this like mother assumes I am. I'm relishing this feeling. That night I embraced both sides of myself and in turn they both protected me equally.What I'm afraid of is telling them how much I enjoyed what I did to Tobias. How it felt to finally be able to protect myself, to no longer be in hiding of what and who I am. That if I had to leave them, that I would be perfectly fine without them. That is what I fear. The looks on their faces, they would have from my admission. Guilt and love I feel for them is the only reason, I can't tell them. That the Nadia they knew is gone. That is untrusting, guarded, and ruthless person is the daughter they now have in replace of the cheerful, lovable, carefree one they had.

Looking at the dash, I see it's 9:37pm. "Where are we now?" I ask, looking out the windshield. More snow is falling, and it only seems to be getting worse.

"We're cutting it pretty close, but we just entered Wyoming," looking at the GPS dad says, "Afton, WY."

"Oh," I sat back and tried to clear my head. It's no use though, "Where are we going again?"

"If we're lucky," mom turns to look at me, "All the way to Baton Rouge."

"Louisiana!"

"Yup, going to the cabin is no longer an option," dad says.

"Why there though?" looking at each other, I know they are trying to decide if they should tell me. I won't push them, but at some point, they will have to tell me. It might as well be sooner rather than later.

"Well—dear," mom starts, fidgeting with her hands; "Your biological father is there Nadia," dad finishes for her, watching me in the rear-view mirror.

"Oh—okay."

Cracking my neck, I lean back and stare at the roof. My biological father. I have so many questions. Why did he give me up? Where was my mother? Better yet did he even know about me. How could my parents keep this from me all these years? What is he like, is he kind and charming like my father or is he cruel and calculating like Tobias's father, or is he like Tobias, cold. There's so much I want to know. Yet I don't know if I really want to know. If he knew about me already, he must not have wanted me. Who just abandons their child. The silence is deafening.

Mom breaks the silence, "We've been in contact with him. From the day he brought you to us, till now." Not bothering to answer I continue to look up. There's just so much information and not enough time to process it all. I know she understands, since she doesn't press me to talk.

We continue to drive in silence for a while longer. Dad suggests stopping at some town called Weber. Which isn't far from Salt Lake. I guess he wants the King and Tobias to think we are headed to our cabin. Apparently, it's safer this way. I just can't shake the feeling that, this is the wrong move. I feel like my soul is tearing me apart. Searching for something or someone.

"I don't think we should stop," leaning forward I rest my head on my dad's head rest.

"Why not? Your father is tired, you're tired, and I'm hungry and tired," mom looks at me. How do I explain what it is I'm feeling at this moment?

"Well, if you really want to stop can we pick somewhere else, please."

Glancing at me, "What's wrong Nadia," dad asks looking back at the road.

"Nothing—I just have this weird feeling going on inside," I sit back, fold my arms across my chest and watch the mountain range, drifting into the wind.

"What kind of feeling," moms voice brings be back from my drifting. Not even thinking about it, "It's like my soul just stepped out of my body to search for something—I don't know."

"Did it feel like you were being ripped apart from the inside," she asks, "Almost like it wants you to follow it."

"Yeah. How did you know?" Instead of answering me she starts crying again. I'm so confused, and her continuous crying just makes me think something is seriously wrong.

"Dad," I need to know what this is, the pain seems to be easing the further we go.

"It's the mating bond," he sighs, "Your destined mate is out here, somewhere. He was either close by or we drove past him."

"We can't stop now Mark. We just can't," mom frantically says, "He'll kill her for what she did to Tobias or worse He'll try to use her. We promised Marcel. We have to keep going."

"I'm going to have to stop eventually, Clare. We need gas or a new car preferably. Food and rest too," looking at her, "We have to stop."

Mom just pouts, while dad continues following the signs to Weber. I wonder what mom meant when she said Tobias's father would try to use me. As I drift into sleep, thinking about the mate, I have out here. Sleep comes quickly and feels like it ended too soon. Mom and dad are arguing and going back and forth about staying in weber. They most think I'm still sleeping; if only they knew I wasn't. Tapping my dad's seat, my hand goes through it. "What the actual f**k," they don't seem to hear me. I try again, but I don't feel anything. Moving to my right, I see myself soundly sleeping. "s**t, s**t, s**t," doing my best not to freak out too much. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. Okay, everything is fine.

This is probably what my parents meant about my powers growing. I read about this; vampires could do this. What was it called again, astro...astril—ugh I should have paid more attention when mom was explaining all their treats. I'll just ask her again when I wake up. Looking around myself, I see a trail of light flowing in the direction of where I felt the intense pain. I want to follow it, it feels comforting. Before I can even move out the car the light starts moving away.

My vision starts to get fussy, looking back at my body, I see mom's hand shaking my knee. Slowly I start to sink back into my body. "mhmm," I mumble.

"Nadia, wake up. We're at a motel," mom tells me. Sitting straighter, I yawn and stretch. Grabbing my bag, I hop out and look around, it reminds me a bit of Portland. Some people around my age, walk by talking about a party nearby. Following my mom to our room, there most me a university close by. Inside our room looks, nice and cozy. Dad has all our stuff inside, and is checking each duffel to make sure, they all have the same survival gear. Placing my knapsack next to one of the beds, I flop down on it. Mom sits on the bed to my left. Rolling to my side, "Something weird happened when I was sleeping," I say to her.

Watching me, "Weird how?" laying down on her right side she faces me.

"I was outside of my body, watching myself sleep, and listening to you and dad argue," burying my head in a pillow.

"It's called astral projection. Have you experienced anything else?"

"Not that I know of, why? Do you think I will do something else?" my voice shakes. Getting off their bed, I scooch over, and she lays next to me. Resting my head on her shoulder, she runs her fingers through my hair.

"It'll be okay, sweetie" she coos at me. Sighing I feel her slip out of my bed and watch her slide back into theirs. Dad finishes up with our bags and places them all by the door. Telling my parents good night, I go to sleep.

The sun's rays stir me awake. Last night I fought with myself to not astral project. Getting out of bed, I head to the bathroom, looking in the mirror, "AHHHH!"

Hearing me scream my dad barges in, "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Turning to him, I remove my hands from my eyes. Cringing when I look at him, I cover them again. "There's a halo around me. There's also one around you to," peaking between my fingers I check again and yup, there is still a yellow glow of light around him. Entering the bathroom, he turns me to the mirror and pulls my hands away from my eyes.

"It was said that, those of use who could feel or see emotions were kissed by the Gods. That fae used to be their favorite race of paranormals," looking at me in the mirror, I look back at him, "But the truth is we weren't their favorites. We are just distant relatives. Where only they can kill each other; the same could be said for us. Only the Gods could kill us all."

No one really talked much about the Gods. I always felt like it was some secret or unwritten rule. I remember my parents telling me to never repeat what they told me. "Come out when you're ready and we'll talk about this new development." Once he leaves, I splash my face with water, brush my teeth, and dry my face. Walking out, I catch the tail end of my parent's conversation, "...I wish we knew more about her mother."

"Marcel will tell her all about her honey. Just remember you will always be her mother." Mom smiles sweetly at dad, kissing his cheek. Rushing to them, I squeeze in myself between them and hug them both. My earlier guilt fades away. It eases me knowing that they will love me no matter what. Right then I decided to tell them everything. About the night with Tobias and how both sides of myself are balanced.

After explaining everything, dad is furious. His aura changed from yellow to gray, where mom's aura is a murky brown. Slowly their auras change to pink then back to their original colors yellow for dad and teal for mom. "Just wondering and it's perfectly fine if it's permanent, but will I forever see auras around people, or will it be something I can just bring forth?"

"For some people it's permanent, for others it's reflexive or used for survival," mom explains.

"So, how will I know if it's permanent or not?" I ask them.

Standing in front of me, dad places his hands on my shoulders and closes his eyes. Inhaling deeply then exhaling, "Close your eyes and try to match your breathing to my own," doing what he asks. It doesn't take my body long to enter a relaxed state. We continue for a few more minutes, "Now open them and tell us what you see."

Opening my eyes, I look between my parents and don't see their auras anymore. "Nothing. They're gone."

"Okay. Now inhale deeply and let it out, but when you let it out focus on wanted to see our auras." Doing as my mom instructs, I close my eyes and try again. When I open them this time, their auras a bright and happy. Dancing around their bodies.

"I see them. The colors are brighter this time, almost happy," looking at them for a little longer; I try bringing my vision back to normal. It happens so quickly. Like removing a pair of sunglasses. Giving me a questioning look, I nod at them letting them know my vision is back to normal.

After we eat breakfast, we each get ready for the new day. Around noon dad decides it might be best to look for a new vehicle. Going outside, I help him search the jeep for anything that can help us. While mom's inside searching for a used car dealership. Finding a few hunting knives and a bow plus some arrows, we whip our prints from the car. Grabbing all our stuff we leave the room. At the office we tell the clerk that the jeep outside looks like the one we saw on the news and to call it in, before the girl has a chance to ask us for our names we leave. The dealership mom found wasn't far from where we stayed, and it is not long before we have a used F-150. Mom being who she is asks the salesman where we can find a target. Once we're all paid up and packed, we head toward target in search of a gps and other essentials we might need.

While at target, I hear a bunch of girls chatting about graduation and what parties are happening that weekend. What captures my attention is when one of the girls mentions, guys that look like they belong in a GQ magazine. All of them having some variation of blonde hair. Rushing to find my parents I tell them what I heard, "They found us. I just heard some girls describe Tobias's men." Grabbing what we have, we pay and leave. By the time we get back to the motel it's 5:55pm. Once in the room, mom passes sandwiches around. Eating in silence, we wait for it to get darker before we head back out. While we wait, mom takes a nap, dad watches tv, and I try out my new powers. Facing the window, I try looking for auras. I wonder if I can see them on that astral plane. Lounging in the chair, I get comfortable. Close my eyes and put myself in a relaxed state. Once I'm there, I concentrate on separating myself. When I feel the pull, I face myself and focus on trying to see my aura.

After focusing for 10 minutes, I begin to give up until I see a slight flash of color around myself. Taking a deeper look, I notice a faint purple hue around me. Squealing, I do my happy dance. Calming down, I move to my dad and sit on the floor in front of him. It doesn't take me long to see his aura, instead the faint hue that I had. His is still as bright as if I were awake. Pleased with myself I head back to my body. I'm just about to connect with myself when I feel someone's presence. Walking through the door, I look around. Not seeing anything I turn to go back in, when out the corner of my eye I see a flash of orange. Following it I spot Tobias getting into a black car. Running back to my body, I jump out the chair, "We need to go NOW."

Checking outside, while dad gets mom sorted. I don't spot Tobias or the car. Glad we left everything we needed in the truck we rush back to the highway. As we drive out of Weber it starts snowing. The snow becomes so bad, that it makes it difficult for dad to see out the windshield. Eventually we become the only car on the road. Mom suggests stopping at a campsite until the snow lets up, but I urge them not to. I can still feel Tobias's eyes watching me as I slept by the window. Watching, waiting to see what we would do next.

Everything seems quiet, almost too quiet. When something dashes across our way. Dad swerves, right to get away from it, straightening up the truck. A few miles further, the high beams of a car breaks through the curtain of snow. Dad moves the car over, so we don't crash into them. The car follows us, every time we move, they move also. The reflection of their beams gets brighter as them move closer and closer to us to the point they are almost touching us. Dad decides to speed up way from them, much to mom's dismay. The car speeds up as well. We swerve left to get away from them. The truck tips to the left a little, mom shrieks, and I brace myself. Looking out the rear-view, all I see are two sets of high beams. One directly behind us and the other is to our right side.

"Dad," I urge the same time mom says, "Mark."

"I know. I'm going as fast as I can without kill us."

The car to our right rams into us, pushing us closer to the mountain side. The sound of metal slide against the rocks is loud. Dad pushes us back against the car, forcing it to move back and out of our way. Again, we increase in speed, trying to outrun them as best we can. Jerking forward, my head snaps back against the head rest. The car #2 slams into us, again and again. Out of nowhere a third set of high beams comes at us head on. The first car clips the right back tire, causing us to start sliding all over the road. The third car slams into the front passenger side. Our truck spins out of control. At some point we're sideways with all three cars on the driver's side. Raising my arm to block the beams, tires squeal, and the cars get closer.

The impact is instant.