A year with the billionaire

Chapter 5

I reach for my mocha, take a sugary soothing sip, and dare to scroll further...

Wait!

The hot liquid catches in my throat and I cough it up, my lips quivering over a hit.

No.

I click the headline, unable to resist:

A Good-Looking Guy, Successful and

of a Certain Age, Still a Bachelor...

Is our Dashing Fitzroy Gay?

It’s an inevitable article, born of an inevitable question, but it tickles me. That’s one question I’m sure I know the answer to. We might not have crossed that line, but the look in his eye back then...the look in his eye only yesterday, so strong it rose above the hatred... No, he’s not gay.

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Learning Cards for All Ages

I only wish I could be as sure about Tessa’s intentions. And I know the letter will help explain, but I haven’t been able to open it. It’s there now, poking out from beneath my laptop, but each time I reach for it my stomach turns over and my fingers refuse to do my bidding. Guilt and grief holding me hostage.

I should have come back sooner. I should have known she was sick. I should have... I should have...

My eyes sting and I grit my teeth, swallow. I’m in a public place, it’s no time for tears, but I’m confused...so confused.

‘What were you thinking, Tessa?’ I whisper.

‘You mean you don’t know?’

I jump as the deep, sexy drawl resonates through my core, my eyes widening as I spin on my stool. ‘Donald!’

I can’t believe my eyes...but my body does. It’s already a hive of activity, my pulse spiking, my mouth drying out.

Does he have to be so goddam sexy all the time? The collar of his herringbone coat is pulled high, his dark wintry look crisp and elegant. His chestnut hair is immaculate, despite the chilling breeze outside, and his eyes, that mouth...

He already looks angry about something. The pink in his cheeks from the biting wind is the only sign of humanity in his face that’s set like stone.

‘What are you—? Why are you—? How did you know I’d be here?’

And why do I have to sound like a tongue-tied schoolgirl with an impossible infatuation?

Because it’s how you feel.

His lips twitch, the sensation inside me deepens—is he laughing at me?

No, I doubt the man ever laughs these days...

‘I have my ways.’

‘I bet you do.’ Every one of them involving the cash he appears to have an endless supply of...it doesn’t explain why he’s here though. ‘And you’re here because...?’

He says nothing and my brows nudge north. Maybe I’m not the only one struggling with their words. Maybe he’s just as disorientated by my presence...

And maybe you’re losing it more than you think!

‘I’m here to see you.’

‘Stating the obvious much?’

Fire flickers behind his eyes and my heart leaps into my throat—do you want to poke the bear?

‘I mean—’

‘I want to apologise,’ he says over me.

‘You—?’ I frown, taken aback...surely I didn’t hear him right. ‘You what?’

‘I want to apologise.’

And now he sounds like a robot...and I’m still not sure I understand. ‘You want to apologise?’

‘I do.’

‘You...do...?’

My chin tucks in as I look up at him and he makes an exasperated sound that has me wanting to laugh.

‘Please don’t make this any harder than it needs to be.’

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Learning Cards for All Ages

‘Harder? Begging your pardon, Donald, but did you rush off for a lobotomy last night or something?’

His frown is instantaneous, and the way it makes his lower lip pout...too appealing, too distracting. But an apology...?

I face him full-on, my confidence growing as relief seeps through my limbs. It has to be a good sign, right?

He drags in a breath...pockets his hands. ‘It was a shock; I was in shock. I had no idea Gran was going to do this.’

‘And you think I did?’

A V forms between his brows and I have the ridiculous urge to smooth it away, a delicate gesture that is so at odds with his sheer masculinity.

‘Well...didn’t you?’

‘God, no! If I had I would’ve told her to her face she’d lost the plot.’

A hint of a smile touches his lips and I yearn for a full-blown grin, the slightest of chuckles—anything to suggest the Donald I once knew is still in there somewhere.

‘You’d have been given quite the ear-bashing if you’d tried.’

I give a soft huff, feel bittersweet memories choking up my throat, and I swallow. ‘She always was deft at saying just the right thing to get me to fall in line.’

His posture softens along with his eyes as the past shifts between us, wrapping around us, uniting us.

‘Well, if you would go around flouting the rules...’

‘Says the guy who couldn’t flout a single one without breaking out in hives.’

And just like that he tenses, every one of his honed muscles drawing tight.

‘I’ve changed since then.’

It’s like he’s in my head, but the words are leaving my lips before I can stop them. ‘So I can see...’

And the real me—the daring, the confident, usually unperturbed one—comes to life and I let my eyes trail over him, full of provocation. I don’t care that I’m eating him with my eyes. I want to devour him. I want him to burn like I do. I want my presence to stir into life that part of him those women on the Internet have enjoyed over the intervening years...

‘This apology...’ I force my eyes back to his, spy the reciprocal fire I’ve succeeded in provoking. ‘I’m still waiting.’

He scoffs and it doesn’t become him... It becomes the old him, though, and I suck my lips in to stop the smile that wants to break free.

‘Ever the demanding one, Amanda.’

‘Well, if you will leave a lady waiting...’

I see the retort burning in his gaze—I see no lady here—but he doesn’t say it. Twenty years ago he would have come straight out with it. Just for fun. Why not now?

Maybe he’s more attuned to what sent me running all those years ago than I give him credit for...or maybe he’s just grown up.

In either case, the humour and the passion are no more. I’m chilled to the bone.

‘This apology?’

His eyes sharpen and I wonder if he’s sensed the shift...

He clears his throat, gives an abrupt nod. ‘I am sorry, Amanda. I’ve had time to reflect. I’ve also had time to read the letter Gran left...have you read yours?’

He spies it poking out on the table and I shake my head. ‘Not yet.’

I see the question in his eyes—why not?

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Learning Cards for All Ages

‘I—I’ll get to it when I’m ready.’

‘Right...’

There’s a pause, and I know he’s pondering my reaction, and all the emotions that feed my hesitancy start to clamber for attention.

‘So, you’ve read the letter and...?’ I throw the focus back on him, smother the inner turmoil.

‘And I don’t agree with what she has done, nor much of what she put in her letter, but this is her last request and I will respect it...to a point.’

‘To a point...?’ I repeat numbly, wondering how far that point will go. Do I get a tent in the garden? A toilet in the outhouse? Are we really doing this? Living together?

My heart starts to race...

‘Yes. And the sooner we can talk it through the better.’

I can’t respond. There are no words for this...this craziness.

‘So, come with me?’

‘Wait. What?’ Panic kickstarts my voice. ‘Come with you where?’

‘To the estate. We can use the travel time to talk.’

‘But I... When?’

‘This afternoon.’

‘But...’

Swallow, Amanda. Breathe.

It’s too soon. I’ve not had enough time to think. To process.

He dips his head, leans that little bit closer, and his cologne reaches me, floods my senses... Why does he have to smell so good too?

‘But what?’

Close your gaping mouth and answer the man.

‘But it’s a couple of hundred miles away.’

‘And? Surely spending the journey with me is not that awful a prospect...’

A shiver runs down my spine as I catch the hint of mockery in his rich, dulcet tones.

‘We used to enjoy one another’s company once, Amanda. I’m sure we can at least be civil for that amount of time.’

The blood seeps from my cheeks and I bluster out a laugh. ‘Is that supposed to make the offer more appealing?’

He gives a wry smile.

‘No, I don’t suppose it does. But I’m sure it benefits the planet in some way, us combining our journey. And I know how much you care for that.’

‘Not when there’s a train heading that way and...’

Hang on, my voice trails off as my eyes narrow. My eco-warrior efforts came after Glenrobin...after him...

Has he been reading up on me? Or is it something Tessa said? What does he know? What has he seen? What’s in the public domain? Protest rallies—sure. The odd arrest—maybe.

Oh, God. A certain picture sears my brain and my cheeks are aflame before I can erase it. Please don’t let him have seen that one...

‘Fine,’ I rush out. ‘When do you—we—leave?’

‘I’ll pick you up at two.’

I wet my lips, my voice failing me again.

‘Is that a problem?’ he asks.

No. Yes. No. But it’s only a few hours away from now...

‘Not at all. Two p.m. it is.’

‘Great.’

‘Great.’

Awkward...

‘Is there anything else?’ I say, when he still doesn’t move.

‘No.’ He comes alive. ‘I’ll see you later.’

He turns to leave and then hesitates. My heart leaps. What now?

He looks back at me, a curious glint in his eye. ‘I’m not, by the way.’

‘You’re not what?’

His eyes flit to the screen of my laptop and to my horror I’m still on that page, with the headline blazing—Is our Dashing Fitzroy Gay?

Of all the articles it had to be that one...

Floor, swallow me now!

‘I’ll take the dashing, though.’

Something glitters behind those chocolate-brown eyes...something that triggers a thousand flutters inside me, each one contending with the mortifying burn.

‘Goodbye, Amanda.’

And then he’s gone, and I want to stick my head and my nether regions in the nearest freezer. Maybe the café will have one out back big enough to take my entire body if I ask nicely enough...

I opt for slamming the laptop closed and pressing my forehead into its solid metal top.