After the Snow

Chapter 9 - Regrets

Chapter 9

Regrets

It took a while for Scott's proposal to sink in. Even though I went around the whole week wearing an engagement ring, it was just kind of surreal. Actually, I didn't wear the ring much. I wasn't ready to tell people. It sorta pissed Scott off, but eventually, he calmed down.

Till the weekend, Scott and I spent almost every day in our bedroom. Obviously, our relationship needed work, and we were trying. Yes, I felt bad for basically shutting out my best friend and guests, but it was just something that had to be done.

Now, I know what you're thinking. 'Why didn't she tell Mackenzie?! She's her best friend.' Well, I guess I just wasn't ready. My family was coming in that following weekend, so I was waiting to tell everyone together.

The weekend rolled around faster than expected, and I was starting to freak out. With everything that had been going on, I had totally forgotten to decorate for Christmas. No Christmas tree, so fancy lights that I hung around the living room, no nothing. It really hit me hard when I woke up that Saturday morning.

"Scott!" I exclaimed, slapping his chest. "We have to go get our Christmas stuff today!" I kept my Christmas stuff in storage since I lived in an apartment and didn't have anywhere to store it.

"Huh? Yeah, sure," He groaned, sticking his head under his pillow. Rolling my eyes, I got out of bed and headed into the bathroom. I took a quick shower, got dressed in jeans, a grey t-shirt, and one of Scott's hoodies. I dried my hair, put on light makeup, and tried to wake up Scott again.

"Scott, please!" I begged, laying down next to him. "My family is coming today and I want to have the place decorated."

"Did you tell them I move in?" He moaned, finally opening his eyes. Crap, he just had to bring that up. No, I had not told my parents, so now I had to tell them my fiancé had moved in.

"Just be ready in ten, please?" I gave him puppy dog eyes, sticking out my bottom lip. He sighed, but got up and headed into the bathroom. Smiling in victory, I walked into the living room.

"Morning," Mackenzie chirped, already up and ready to go. She was sitting on the couch, legs crossed, doing something on her phone.

"Morning," I replied, giving her a smile. My eyes flickered to the boy sleeping on the recliner for a mere second before I quickly looked away. He was one of my main problems with Scott, and I should probably stay away from him. But I didn't have the heart to tell him to go home, and I couldn't bear the thought of him leaving.

"Are you making breakfast?" She asked, following me into the kitchen.

I nodded, "Yup, any requests?" I leaned against the counter, shoving my hands in my pockets. The guilt of not telling Mackenzie about my engagement was really starting to get to me, I felt so guilty.

"Chocolate chip pancakes?" She said hopefully, sitting down at the kitchen table. She was so happy, so unsuspecting that I had been deceiving her...

"Coming right up," I smiled, pulling a large bowl down from the cupboard. After adding the ingredients I pulled out a saucepan and started to cook the mini cakes.

"Bree, is something wrong?"

I jumped, "No, nothing, why would something be wrong?" Because the world was against me, I let out a nervous giggle. It wasn't on purpose, but it defiantly made Mackenzie more suspicious.

"Because your hands are shaking," She said, raising an eyebrow. "Is there something you need to tell me?"

"No!" I exclaimed much too quickly. She crossed her arms, jetting out her hip. "Seriously Kinz, it's nothing."

"If it's nothing, then tell me." She reasoned, tapping her foot on the tile. Should I? I really should, but this whole week my plan had been to tell everyone together. Aw hell, who am I kidding, I shouldn't have kept this from her in the first place! Apparently, I took to long trying to decide, because she suddenly exclaimed, "Oh god, are you pregnant?!"

"No!" I screamed, my eyes widening in shock. "Jesus, no!"

"Well then what is it?!" She huffed, exasperated. Looking at the ground I played with my fingers, gulping. "Bree?"

"Scott proposed, okay?!" I sighed, running a hand roughly through my hair. She looked shocked for a split second where there was nothing but silence filling the apartment. It unsettled me as my stomach knotted in worry. "Say something..."

"When?" She breathed, still looking shocked. Everything came bearing down on me in that one second. All the haze and shock of everything vanished, and I realized something really important. Something I should've known all along.

"A few days ago?" I said, crossing my arms uncomfortably. Oh god Bree, what had you done?! You were such an i***t! "And I said yes."

"So, you're engaged?" Mackenzie gasped, her jaw still hanging. I nodded numbly. Yes, Mackenzie, I was engaged to a man I didn't truly love, because the truth was, I didn't love Scott. I mean, I loved him as a friend, but I wasn't in love with him. Mackenzie squealed, wrapping me in a hug. "I'm so happy for you!"

"Thank you," I whispered, hugging her back. What was I going to do?!

"Can I see the ring?!" She giggled, jumping up and down excitedly. I put on a fake smile and nodded, reaching into my pocket and pulling out the ring. That's where I always kept it. "Oh, it's beautiful Bree..."

This is the moment I always imagined as happy. I was supposed to be jumping up and down with my best friend, overwhelmed with happiness as I examined my new engagement ring. Instead, I felt hopeless. I couldn't say no to Scott, he was a secure future, I knew I would be taken care of, and besides, it was too late. Mackenzie knew, and that meant within ten minutes it would be on f*******:. Everyone would know.

Suddenly, a loud blaring filled the apartment. I flinched, jumping. The smell of smoke filled my nose, making my mind jolt back to my forgotten pancakes.

"Bree, the pancakes!" Mackenzie shrieked, pointing at the stove. As fast as I could I pulled them from the heat, shoving them in the sink and cranking on the cold water. Probably not my best plan. Smoke and steam filled the kitchen, making me cough and sputter.

"What the hell is going on?!" Anthony yelled, running into the kitchen. I spun around, giving him a helpless look. A second later Scott ran in, looking around frantically. "Don't just stand there, open some windows!" Oh, yeah, we kinda need to get the smoke out of here...

We jumped into action, opening all the windows in the apartment. There were only four, two in the bedroom and two in the living room. The kitchen didn't have any. Scott also opened the front door while Mackenzie got a broom and started fanning the fire alarm, attempting to get it to stop.

"What do we do?!" I exclaimed, throwing my arms in the air. The fire alarm was still going, much to my aggravation. The constant beep beep beep was really annoying. Plus, if we didn't get it to stop really soon, someone would call the fire department. "Make it stop!"

"What am I supposed to do?!" Mackenzie cried, dropping her broom helplessly. Scott rolled his eyes at us, laughing. "What do you suggest, smart ass?!" Shaking his head Scott reached up and pulled the batteries from the fire alarm. It stopped blaring immediately.

"Well then..." I said under my breath, blushing slightly. Scott chuckled again, and Anthony joined him in his laughter. "Quit laughing and close those windows, it's freezing!" I huffed, going back into the kitchen. Well, so much for breakfast...

"Hey, it's okay," Scott whispered, wrapping his arms around me from behind. I took a deep, shaky breath. Talk about embarrassing! I just almost set my apartment on fire. "We can eat fruit."

I chuckled, "Thanks."

"Hey, what are we doing today?" Mackenzie asked, walking into the kitchen with Anthony. Well, someone had to come with me to get Christmas stuff, and Scott still had to shower, so...

"Would you come with me to get my Christmas decorations?" I asked, giving her puppy dog eyes.

"Sure, I have nothing better to do. Let's go!" She jumped forward, grabbing my hand and ripping me from Scott's grip. I grabbed my keys from the counter and followed her into the living room.

"See you guys later!" I screamed over my shoulder as Mackenzie rushed me out the door. To be honest, I don't think she was excited to get me out there for Christmas decorations. And the second we got in the car, my theory proved to be right.

"Don't think you're done explaining," Mackenzie said, buckling her seat belt. "How did he propose to you?" Rolling my eyes, I started the car.

"Dude, he got down on one knee," I shrugged, trying to brush it off like no big deal. This wasn't really something I wanted to talk about, because honestly, I wasn't all that excited. It's for your future, I kept telling myself.

"Where?" She kept prying, oblivious to my discomfort. Get a clue, Kenz!

"On a bridge, in the snow. Very romantic." That was the truth. When I thought of that moment, it was like something I would see in a movie. And maybe that was part of what was bothering me. Real love wasn't like a movie, no part of it was. Even if someone tried really hard to make something perfect, it was just impossible.

"Awww," She cooed. I forced a smile, taking a deep breath.

Was I making the right decision?