YOU WERE MINE FIRST

Blood Snow

CHAPTER 11: Blood Snow

Jaxon Cole's scream didn't sound like an Alpha. It sounded like a boy. High and raw. Wet. It cracked in the middle.

His hands were buried in snow, fists clenched, claws half out, half in, like his wolf couldn't decide to shift or give up. Nose bleeding freely, two bright streams over his mouth, dripping onto white furs, onto dead blue flowers crushed under his knees. Gold eyes leaking light because backlash was tearing him from inside.

Fenric was howling inside him so loud I could hear it without Lyra. Even the northern Alphas, foreheads still to snow, flinched. A wolf howling for a mate that wasn't his anymore.

Rhazien's arms were locked around me so tight I could barely breathe, but I didn't want to. Legs wrapped around his waist, face buried in his throat over my mark, white tail wrapped tight around his back under the huge black King's cloak. His bare chest steamed in freezing air. His purr shook his whole body, loud and victorious, so every kneeling wolf knew the King won.

"Mine," he growled into my white ear, huge hand fisting in tangled white hair, other hand splayed over my thigh under the cloak, claws pricking lightly. "My Queen. My Luna. My debt that will never be repaid. My wife."

Wife. The word made my white eyes flutter shut, tail thump once without permission, Lyra sigh inside, smug and full. Jaxon heard it. _Wife._ And his scream turned into a sob.

"Elara, please," he choked, blood bubbling on lips, gold eyes fixed on my bare feet, on Rhazien's hand on my thigh. "Please you don't understand, Fenric won't stop howling, he says you're white, you're queen, you're ours, he says I killed us, please, I rejected Tanya, I did it this morning in front of the pack, I said I, Alpha Jaxon Cole, reject you Tanya Rook, and she screamed and-"

Rhazien's purr cut off. Dead silence. Even wind stopped. I felt his whole body go stone under me. Not hot. Cold that burns worse. Hand in my hair tightened, not hurting, but holding me. Gold-white eyes went flat. Gold ring gone. Just black. Beast looking out.

"What did you say?" His voice was so quiet snow soaked it up. So quiet the northern Alphas pressed harder to stone, trying to disappear. "Say it again. What you did to the other female."

Jaxon didn't get the danger. He thought Rhazien cared about Tanya. He lifted his bleeding face, hopeful, pathetic. "I rejected her, My King, I swear, I rejected Tanya Rook this morning before I came, in front of Beta and her father, I said she is not my Luna, you can ask the coachman, I did it because Elara is my fated mate, my Goddess given mate, and by werewolf law-"

Lyra surged inside me so fast I choked, white light exploding behind eyes, claws extending and digging into Rhazien's shoulders, drawing fresh dark blood. _Tanya Rook. Little brown wolf who put hands on our pup's hair and laughed when we bled._

I went rigid in his arms. Tanya. My best friend since six. Who braided my hair. Who shared stolen honey buns. Who laughed louder when Jaxon called me defect. Who wore red on rejection day and sat on Jaxon's lap on the Alpha chair and kissed him while I bled. Jaxon rejected her this morning. To take me back. Like I was a dress he returned because the new one didn't fit.

Rhazien felt Lyra rise. Felt my tail lash furious. Felt my claws dig deeper. He looked down at me, scarred beautiful face inches from mine, searching my glowing white eyes.

"Elara," he whispered, only for me, low and rough, breath hot on my white ear making it flick. "Little debt. Do you want her? Do you want Tanya Rook? Say the word and Cain will drag her up the mountain and throw her at your bare feet in the snow and you can decide if she kneels or leaves. You are Queen. Queens decide."

Offered like breakfast. Old Elara would have said no. Old Elara scrubbed pots and forgave because forgiving was easier when you had no wolf. New Elara, white eyes glowing, King blood in mouth, King mark pulsing, didn't say no.

I pushed back just enough to look over my shoulder at Jaxon kneeling with dead blue flowers and bleeding nose. He saw white eyes lock on him and flinched, hopeful.

"Elara?" he whispered, hand reaching, shaking.

"She laughed," I said. Voice small. Human. Not Queen. Just mine. Eighteen year old kitchen girl voice, raw, cracking. "On my birthday. When you rejected me. She laughed. She sat on your lap. In my Luna chair. In red. And she said 'finally the defect knows she is a defect.' She said mother should have drowned me like wolfless pups used to be drowned."

Jaxon's reaching hand froze mid air. Because he remembered. He was there. He laughed too that day.

"I didn't-" he started. "Tanya just- she was jealous, she-"

"She pushed me," I whispered, louder now, voice starting to layer, Lyra bleeding in, cold at edges. "When we were fourteen. Into the river behind the pack house. In winter. Because you talked to me that day. Because you gave me an apple. I couldn't swim. I have a scar on my knee still from the rock. You pulled me out. You said 'don't tell anyone defect, they'll say you did it for attention.' Do you remember?"

Jaxon went white under blood. Because he remembered. Rhazien's arms around me turned to steel. Claws shot out fully and dug into black stone stair under his boots, cracking it. Dark blood from his own palms dripped onto snow and hissed.

Cain, who had been silent at edge of courtyard, made a soft low sound. Because even Cain didn't know that part.

Lyra was fully forward now. White light exploded so bright snow around us melted in a perfect circle, exposing black stone. Steam rose. White ears flat, angry. Huge tail uncurled and lashed.

_That brown wolf female who laughed while our pup bled, who wore red while our pup wore rags, who pushed our daughter into ice river when she was fourteen. You rejected her this morning? No, boy Alpha. You don't get to reject her. She belongs to us now._

Jaxon shook so hard snow fell off shoulders. Gold eyes wide, staring at fangs showing now, delicate white points over lower lip.

"Elara, please," he whispered, tears and blood mixing. "Please, I didn't know-"

Rhazien moved. One second he held me. Next his huge boot slammed down on Jaxon's reaching hand, pinning it to black stone where snow melted, crushing fingers under heel, enough to make Jaxon scream, gold eyes rolling back.

"Don't touch my wife," Rhazien said, soft, conversational, while his boot ground Jaxon's fingers into stone. He still held me with one arm, legs still around waist. "With your rejected hands that threw her away for a brown wolf who tried to drown her."

Jaxon's sob broke, trying to pull free, Fenric howling inside. "Rhazien," I whispered, small hand on his jaw, white claws stroking scarred cheek, and black eyes snapped to me instantly, boot still on hand. "Stop. Don't break him. Not yet."

He stared at me, gold-white ring flickering back, breathing hard, torn between beast who wanted to rip boy Alpha apart, and man who wanted to obey Queen. He lifted boot slow. Jaxon's hand flopped to snow, red, swollen, but not broken. Jaxon clutched it, sobbing.

"As my Queen commands," Rhazien murmured, forehead to mine, nuzzling my white ear, purr starting again.

Behind us, Cain cleared throat, stepping forward, gold eyes fixed on Jaxon with disgust. "My Queen, permission to speak? About Tanya Rook?"

Rhazien nodded once. Cain looked down at Jaxon, lip curled. "Boy Alpha, you rejected Tanya this morning in front of Beta and her father. Did you do it properly? By werewolf law? 'I, Alpha Jaxon Cole, reject you, Tanya Rook, as my chosen mate'? Or did you just shout 'we are done' and run with flowers?"

Jaxon flinched, clutching crushed hand. "I- I said I reject you, I said it, her father was there-"

"Did she accept?" Cain snapped. Silence. Wind howled. "Did she accept the rejection? Chosen mate rejection must be accepted by both sides to break, boy Alpha. Fated rejection rips soul whether accepted or not, but chosen requires acceptance. If she didn't say 'I accept your rejection,' then by law she is still your chosen Luna. And you left her bleeding in pack house while you came to beg your fated mate who is now marked by Lycan King."

Jaxon's face drained. Because he knew. He shouted and ran, grabbed flowers, carriage. He left Tanya bleeding too. Just like he left me.

Lyra laughed inside. _Oh little wolf, now we have her. She is still his chosen. She can feel his pain through half bond. She feels him kneeling in snow for us right now._

"Go back," I said to Jaxon, voice layered again, cold royal, echoing off stone. "Go back to Blood Stone, Jaxon Cole. Tell Tanya she is still your chosen Luna. Tell your pack their Alpha kneels for a White Queen who will never be theirs. Tell my parents debt is paid and they will never see a crown from me again. And tell them if they ever set foot on Black Mountain without my permission, I will let my King use their pelts as rugs."

Jaxon stared up, hopeful, pathetic, thinking I was sending him away to fix things.

"And Jaxon?" I leaned down, white hair falling like curtain, white ears brushing his bloody cheek, fangs inches from his ear, mark glowing right in front of his eyes. "You will feel me for rest of your life. Every time you try to touch her, you will feel my mark burn through dead bond. Every time you try to kiss her, you will taste my King's blood in memory. You rejected what you could never deserve. And he claimed it. So it is his. Never yours again."

Jaxon's sob broke, forehead dropping to black stone where my bare feet melted snow, pressing bleeding nose to footprint like trying to scent me one last time.

Rhazien turned, carrying me, stepping over crushed blue flowers, grinding them under boot, up black stone stairs toward broken doors.

Behind us, Cain's voice rang out, cold and gleeful, "Take northern Alphas to healing wing, get Magnus jaw fixed before he bleeds on Queen's courtyard. Give them furs, wine, tell them Luna says thank you for kneeling. Take flower boy back to outer gates. Throw him in carriage. Tell coachman if he ever drives up my mountain again without invite, I will eat his horses. And clean this blood before Luna sees it again."

Northern Alphas shouted, foreheads to snow, "HAIL WHITE QUEEN! HAIL LUNA!"

Jaxon stayed kneeling, face in melted footprint, Fenric howling inside.

Rhazien carried me through broken doors, past guards whispering "My Queen," into ruined bedroom where furs were torn and fire dead, and kicked dresser aside and slammed doors shut, blocking cold and blood and boy with flowers.