Sunflowers & Sins

Chapter 5

'You can get cheap jewellery anywhere these days Jessie. It's not about “'looking cool” cousin: it's about style, preparation and taking your time beforehand. Don't wear a dress that looks like it needs curtain-rings...or is too b****y tight. Try and keep it simple and sober my dear.'

'You mean like dullsville, eh?'

'Look...we'll go into town and fit you up. I'll pay...within reason! How does that sound?'

'Oh yummy...I like it! Thanks.' I'll show her thought Jessie... 'But don't you get lonely Eve? You're always busy as hell and you work later than anybody else...where's your life? Where is your fun for Christ’s sake? You know what, you are too...' Jessie paused, searched for the right word... 'Too b****y aloof - too stuck-up Eve. You'll never get laid the way you are.'

Evelyn flushed. She was one of those who thought that matters of s*x or intimacy - and any talk of it, should be confined to the bedroom. Perhaps she was a prude. But in the matter of 'having a life' - in a small way, Eve thought she had a point. Yes, she would go out, but it was usually with Jessie otherwise there were few dates. Visiting clients and officials were often asking her out for dinner and she would occasionally accept, if not for business reasons, but it never went anywhere although several had 'tried it on'.

However, Jessie's suggestion surprised Eve…at first, but she quickly warmed to the idea. 'Look Jessie, some men may like 'power-bitches' but in my experience, most don't. So, drop the 'b***h' bit. Do you understand? And yes, I suppose you do know the general workings, so we'll see how we get on.'

Eve was actually looking forward to it - wondering how long the charade would last and realising the competition element was all part of Jessie’s plan. She was unconcerned; she had no time for silly dalliances. As far as Eve was concerned Jessie could ‘fill her boots’ as much as she wanted to.

Magnificent Three

And so it happened, only the pretence was adopted on a continuous basis whenever they went out particularly at their weekly lunch sessions, and if they ever went out at night - with Jessie waiting for the right, unsuspecting victim to walk in and begin chatting them up, making a play...

...but the males had come and the males had gone with no luck for Jessie although it was noticeable that Eve, even as the 'lowly secretary' as Jessie would remind her whenever she could, remained capable of offering her brand of quiet attraction. Still, as Eve said to her, 'early days'; and for a while it was like buses - none turning up then suddenly one lunch, three men walked in they hadn't seen before.

As they approached the bar, they scanned the scene as men will for the female scenery, soon 'clocking' a pair of girls on their own, neither of whom looked up.

This was part of Eve's schooling - ' Don't look interested,' Eve had said. They will come if they want to.

Jessie had struggled with this advice...not exactly 'Hi boys – over here!' she thought to herself...which is what she might have done in the past, probably half-cut at the time too, twirling her house keys around her finger, with inviting looks. And who could resist the 'beckoning eye' of an attractive woman?

No - that was the 'old' Jessie. New leaf now...I'll show my snooty cousin 'what for'.

It didn't take long before one of them approached, exchanging pleasantries and other amiabilities while enquiring if the ladies would mind some company, with drinks offered into the bargain. The other two joined him while rolling out the typical banal patter...and conversations began.

Normally Eve would have said 'thanks but no thanks' to any suggesting of drinks and male company but she could see that Jessie was looking expectantly at a forthcoming challenge as per their plan. Slightly irritated, neither did she like their presumption that she and Jessie would so readily accommodate them – too presumptuous she thought, nevertheless and contrary to her better judgement she played the passive role to Jessie, the saving grace was that her cousin would 'lead the way', something with which Eve was never comfortable when it came to socialising with the opposite s*x.

She noticed that one of them was thin and quite tall - like a long-distance runner - and was wearing a blue suit but with very light-brown, fancy-style shoes... Oh dear! She wondered - does no one teach them dress-sense these days? She also noticed that his feet were long and narrow so that his pointed shoes turned up at the toes almost like a court-jester's which seems to be the current fashion, so she had no trouble in offering a genuine smile during the introductions…probably a smile of pity and all-in-all, she thought that there was nothing of note about his features.

Additionally, she suspected correctly that Jessie had already directed her attention towards the man of average height with fair hair who had a ready smile and sparkling eyes...nicer looking all round and so hoped that she would play a conservative hand, heeding the advice that Eve had offered. But the more Eve observed this man, the more she realised a creature, although pleasant enough on first acquaintance, she quickly recognised his character to be of a negative pleasantness that lies in inoffensiveness, possibly dull. She also noticed that each time Jessie fixed her eyes upon him intently, he coloured under her gaze.

Jessie would soon tire of this one thought Eve.

The third member of that group was fairly tall and solid, industrial even, with thick limbs and large hands. He had curly, coppery hair and ears that stuck out perpendicular to his head...this made her smile yet again, when each time he would talk to them...he always seemed to have a reason to engage in conversation, had an opinion. At first glance Eve did not take to him at all and just tolerated his false pleasantries; there was something of him about which she did not like. But those ears; once more, Eve outwardly smiled and inwardly chuckled.

What a group! Where have all the Robert Mitchums gone, she asked herself? She wondered if they would be stuck with these boys or pestered by them each time they came to this pub for lunch, which was usually once a week. Indeed, they were, although Jessie took comfort from the fact that they did zoom in on her first: but they had nothing to offer, only banalities aimed at keeping the ladies' interest.

Following the introductory small-talk the conversation moved on to 'Where do you work, what do you do?' etc. etc., and indeed, with the usual allotted lunch-break period most people have away from the grindstone, there was enough time for pleasant talk and superficial news to be swapped between them. It also transpired that although all three were into cars - Jessie rolled her eyes at this - Big-Ears was also seriously into sport, especially cricket. It was on this topic, which consumed several minutes, a lapse of time that was filled with rather stilted exchange of soundbites thought Eve, that the only real point of interest came up...that of a cricket ball going through a window; Big-Ears took the floor and laboured this point and achievement to his listeners...as he was the one who'd hit the ball:-

'It was a six...and we won the game on it!' he almost whooped, 'The last ball nearly!' he said, very pleased with himself.

'Oh, how exciting,' replied Jessie in a false tone, inviting a kick under the table from Eve.

Tall-man piped in...'What he didn't tell you was all that happened years ago when we were at school, all old news – he dines off it all the time...and other things he did, if you asked him.'

Please don't anybody, prayed Eve.

Big-Ears and Tall Man exchanged looks...the tale was obviously an old, oft-repeated tale it seems. Big-Ears looked embarrassed. Both Eve and Jessie liked him a little less - a braggart...but an innocent braggart – and Eve then felt a tinge of pity for him.

'Where was this house - whose house was it?' was the easy question from Eve to politely progress the tale. 'Did you have to pay for it or...'

' Please mister, can I have my ball back ?' chimed in Jessie, mimicking a young naughty child. They all laughed, except Big-Ears who maintained a serious facade while colouring a little.

'Oh no, it wasn't a house. It was that tatty pavilion hut by the old sports field our Town School used in the past, probably not there anymore. Anyway, when we and the old lady whose hut it was looked around inside, we couldn't find it – we never found it.'

'How strange,' mused Eve.

'At least you missed the greenhouses next door,' added Tall Man . 'He was quite miffed actually. It was a grudge match and....well, you tell them...' he said, trailing off while looking invitingly at Big-Ears .

'Yeah, real cheesed off. I had written my initials on the ball...because I just knew I was going to knock it for six to win the match, and I did. We only needed 4 runs. You see, the bowler - he was a fast-bowler - kept bouncing the ball halfway so I just helped it on its way over my shoulder. An easy one...up into the sky it went, then into the hut! Couldn't find the bugger afterwards though.'

'Well, not all bad news then if you missed the greenhouse,' Eve concluded.

Afterwards...

'My God! What was that all about - b****y cricket?!' Jessie had said right after they left. '...and he looked so pleased telling us about something that happened years ago at school! Cricket? He needs to change his chat-up lines.' Both laughed.

'Well, at least you now know how to deal with a fast-bowler,' replied Eve chuckling some more.

They had discussed the ‘three stooges’ as Jessie was wont to label them, with Jessie piping up with the fact that it could have been promising on first meeting them...they were nice enough lads, but--

'I think Big-Ears has latched onto you Jessie...he kept looking your way. What was his name again...Kevin or Graham? Yes, it was Graham, I think. But there's something about him. I can't take to him...the other two seemed pleasant enough.'

'But I don't do 'pleasant'...or nice,' she said, 'And anyway...just look at the way the ginger one walks Eve...bouncing along on the balls of his feet. Not cool. What about those b****y big ears! No....he's off my list Eve - I couldn't be with him. As for the tall thin one, well, the way he seems to mince about with his short strides and long legs.'

How cruel thought Eve.

'Like one of those dancers on TV - whatshisname?' Eve cut in, '…I thought that too, actually. And what about the quiet one cousin...I'm dying to hear how the poor guy measures up on your bed-post chart. Be honest.'

'No chance. If I flashed a bit of thigh at him, he's probably feint,' chuckled Jessie continuing on the theme.

'Jessie...you are just terrible. Poor blokes.'

'Well that's what all blokes get excited about at the end of the day. Am I right – or am I right cousin? After seeing that lot you can see now Eve why some women go for “a bit of rough” - you know what I mean?'

She knew from long back that Jessie could be both funny - and coarse, something that would embarrass her noble sensibilities. She had heard plenty of lewd banter and swearing in her life but nitty-gritty s*x talk or toilet humour, as Jessie was often uttering from time to time were matters that did not sit comfortably with her.

“Toilet stuff is for the toilet...sex stuff is for the bedroom and don't you forget it,” her mother had told her with a stern look many, many years ago.