Awakening Fate

Chapter 19: A Mind Doctor

Emmeline’s POV

              I groan as I hear someone knocking at my door. Rolling away from the sound I try to hide myself by wrapping up in my comforter. No such luck as it is easily ripped away from me revealing my mother standing over me with a bright smile.

              “Good morning sweetheart!” She sings moving over to my window and pulling open the curtains. I hiss as the bright light momentarily blinds me.

              “Mom!” I whine trying to burry my head under my pillows. My mother merely laughs at my pain.

              “Emmy, you are going to be a Luna. Time to get used to early mornings.”

              “I hate mornings.” I mumble glaring at her.

              “Yes, I know, but now up you go.” She grabs my wrists and pulls me into a sitting position before disappearing into my closet. She tosses me some clothes and basically shoves me into the bathroom.

              I pull on a plain white t-shirt and light blue jean shorts. After freshening up a bit, I decide to throw on some mascara, blush and lip balm choosing to keep things simple. I leave my hair down since I’m not sure what my plans are for the day. Exiting the bathroom, I spot my mother picking up my room.

              “Mom what are you doing?”  

              My mom turns to face me with a worried look. “Emmy, please sit down.”

I start to become anxious as I see how serious my mom looks now. “Mom, what is going on?”

My mother holds up a hand silencing me. “Emmy, we are all so happy for you to have Clark as your mate. He is an ideal match for you. Your father and I want you to be happy, but we fear that whatever happened when you were missing may cause some challenges along the way. So, we decided it was time to reach out and get you some help.” She looks at me apologetically and reaches out to hold my hands.

My eyes burn with tears, but they were tears of frustration. I don’t want to be seen as weak. I don’t want to prove Kenzie or Hayden right.  “I’m fine mom. I promise, I don’t want to burden anyone from the pack with trying to help me get over what happened.”

My mother smiles softly. “Sweetheart I think last night showed everyone that is not true.” She squeezes my hand reassuringly. “I also wish you would have come to us about problems you were experiencing within the pack.”

I look away from my mother not wanting to see the hurt in her eyes. “I didn’t want to be the weak spot for our family.” My voice quivers slightly as I start to admit my fears to my mother.

“Emmy, you know that each member brings something to each pack. Each of us has our strengths and our weaknesses. To only acknowledge your weakness is the result of a mental block you created.” She stands up leaving me sitting on my bed feeling deep in thought at what she said.

“So, your father and I met with the current Alpha and Luna and came up with something that may help you break down the mental blocks you created. You will be meeting with a psychologist who will help you challenge your trauma experiences but also help you learn to become mentally strong. A quality that will benefit you in your role as Luna.” She states pulling my computer chair away from the small desk in my room.

“Mom we don’t have one of those in the pack, and if we don’t have one I doubt another pack will.”

“Correct, so you will need to be on your best behavior because he is human.” Mom states honestly. My mouth about drops to the floor and it takes me a minute to collect myself.

“I don’t think I’m ready to venture outside of this area mom.”

“We know. That is why the Alpha has given his permission to have the Doctor come here.”

“I don’t know what to say.” I express feeling overwhelmed.

“Well, take a minute and prepare yourself, because he will be up here in about five minutes.” She says placing the computer chair a few feet from me. I can’t even form words as I look around my room and realize that I am going to be letting a stranger into my most private space. Time escapes me as I’m left sitting there silently panicking until a soft knock brings me back to reality.

My mother walks gracefully over to the door and gestures someone to enter. An older gentleman comes walking into my room. He is shorter than most of the males in our pack, but that’s not atypical for an average human. He has dark hair that has a sprinkle of grey in it. His age is evident in the lines that decorate his face.

“Welcome Dr. Lincoln.” My mother says gently shaking his hand upon him entering.

“Thank you.” He states and glances at me. “You must be Emmeline.” He holds his hand out to me making me sigh internally as I stand and shake his hand softly.

“I’ll leave you two to it.” My mother says softly before walking out of the room.

“So where do we start?” I ask sitting back down on my bed and gesturing Dr. Lincoln to sit in my small computer chair.

“Well, that depends on where you want to start. The process I take with each client is to go wherever you take the conversation. No pressure, just trust the process.” He says giving a small shrug.

“Okay then, I guess we will start with the fact that my parents think this will help me.”

“Why do you think that?”

I groan feeling slightly embarrassed about having to open up to this man. “Because, I have been bullied and then recently had what you could say was a scary experience.” Dr. Lincoln merely nods his head indicating that he is listening to me.  

“I don’t really want to talk about that experience quite yet.” I state a bit more defensively than I mean to.

“That’s fine. We can get to that on a later date. Tell me about the bullying.”

“Well, there are two individuals specifically who really hate me. They have made my high school years a living hell.” I pause looking up to see Dr. Lincoln staring at me with such interest I feel nervous to continue, but he just nods urging me to keep on talking.

I’m surprised at how easily this man gets me to open up to him. I share with him every evil thing Kenzie and Hayden have ever done to me. He doesn’t get upset or look at me with pity, instead he just sits there listening intently. The more I talk the lighter I start to feel.

“It must have been hurtful to be targeted by some of your peers.” He states in such a quiet voice that if I wasn’t waiting for his response I would have missed it.

“Yes, and now I can’t help but almost freeze up when I feel threatened now. Things have escalated over the years and now I have panic attacks.” I explain feeling slightly embarrassed again.

“That’s understandable.” Dr. Lincoln states closing a small notebook. “There is something I want to try and hopefully it will help you tackle your own urge to shut down when things get hard. I’m going to introduce you to some guided mediation techniques focusing on calming your entire body. Would that be okay?”

“Yes.” I whisper feeling a bit unsure of myself.

The whole process felt strange. It required me to close my eyes and focus on my breathing to steady my heartbeat. The entire time I could sense that Dr. Lincoln was giving me instructions, but I could not grasp what he was specifically saying to me. Every inch of my body felt heavy as I slipped into a relaxed state. There was no fear, no panic, no self-doubt. When Dr. Lincoln called my attention back to the room I was surprised at how alive I felt.

“That was amazing.” I state a bit in shock making Dr. Lincoln chuckle.

“I’m glad it was helpful. Over our next few sessions, I would like to help you master this skill, so that you can do it on your own.” He explains with a small smile. I nod excitedly.

              “Another thing I would like to see happen is for you to come to my office in town. I was informed that you may be hiding within this massive building to avoid your fears.” He says making my smile quickly fade.  

              Dr. Lincoln notices my hesitation. “All in good time though.” He reassures me with a small smile.

              “Thank you.” I whisper as he stands and collects his things. I walk him to my door feeling better about this experience. Maybe Dr. Lincoln will be able to help me after all.

              Following the session, I decide to go and find Lily. All I want to do is spend time with my friends and start living my life the way I use to. I throw my hair up into a messy ponytail and text Lily. It doesn’t take long for her to respond, and we decide to go for a walk around the packhouse.

              “I can’t believe you are the one who is my brother’s fated mate!” Lily says jumping up and down clapping her hands.

              “I still have a hard time believing it.”

              “Why? You are perfect for my brother. Those overly fake dressed up barbies are not my brother’s type at all. It just took him forever to realize it.” She states confidently with a small curt nod.

              “You really didn’t like them.” I ask feeling a bit self-conscious knowing that Clark could have had someone like Hayden as a mate.

              “I didn’t hate them, necessarily, but I didn’t like how self-centered they are. That would never work when it comes to leading a pack.” Lily explains staring ahead as we walk around the courtyard.

              “I kind of feel bad for Hayden.” I say looking around at all the pack members enjoying the summer weather.

              I glance over to see Lily looking at me as if I had lost my mind. “Why do you feel bad?”

              “Because she really loved him and it seems like it was reciprocated in the end. It has to be hard to let go of something you wanted so badly, but I hope that she does find that happiness.”

              Lily laughs a bit at my explanation. “Right there is the reason why you will be a better Luna then Hayden. She wouldn’t have thought about you at all if the roles were reversed.”

              I shrug slightly at her statement. “I guess we will never know now, huh.”

              “What we do know is that you are now going to be my sister. Everything we ever wanted finally coming true.” Lily says making me chuckle.

              “Hey tonight some of us are going to lake house tonight. It’s not far and it would be fun if you tagged along. What do you think?”

              “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” I start to say feeling uneasy about leaving the comfort of the pack house.

              “Oh, come on!” Lily whines pulling me to stop on our walk. “You need some fun before my mother and brother put you into full Luna training mode. Plus, tonight is the best night to go, because Clark had to leave for the day and won’t be back till tonight. I can keep you pre-occupied while prince charming is away.” She states sarcastically making me scowl. “Please!” She continues to whine giving me her best pout.

              I groan and throw my hands up in defeat. “Fine, but just to the lake house that’s it.” Lily jumps up and down excitedly

              “Good! Let’s go get ready.” She says pulling me back towards the packhouse as I internally curse myself for agreeing to this.

              How bad can spending time with my friends be?