Becoming The Werewolf Queen

Chapter 010

~~Killian~~

I walked away from them with Carson by my side. He wouldn’t stop mumbling about how he hated what Esmeralda just did. He kept pacing like a wounded dog, really angry that Esmeralda interrupted our conversation.

Esmeralda, that name was ingrained into my memory like a bad habit, I’ve not been able to sleep or close my eyes without her appearing in my head since the day she got here.

And last night? My wolf lost it all, it lost all control like it always does on the night of every full moon. But last night’s own was different.

My wolf usually goes full feral on the night of every full moon that all I used to do was just to go into the woods, hunt some animals then kill a reasonable amount of rogues. I’d just be purely out of my own body at that moment.

I kill anything or anyone in sight. Never in a million years did I think that my own body would defy that. Instead of going into the woods as usual, I found myself going towards the room of Esmeralda.

And when she cans outside, it was as though I hadn’t seen her before. The desire and pull was just so strong that I just felt like claiming her in ways that I never thought I could.

I don’t know the kind of crazy pull between us, but I also know that the girl is dangerous and I should run away from her. If it’s not for Lily, I’d have had her out of this pack since.

“I’m sure she just wants to get Lily away at that moment so we won’t finish that conversation. Why is it that it’s when we were talking about spies that she shows up?” Carson’s voice brought me back to reality.

“Have you done the things I asked you to do?” Was all I could ask him, with my eyes fixated on Esmeralda’s back.

My wolf was literally going berserk in my head, he wanted her close to him. I hate the kind of hold her presence has on him. It’s like we both couldn’t focus anymore because of her.

“I’ve done it. The patrol routine has changed, no one gets in or out of the pack without us knowing. And how was last night? How many rogues did you end up killing?”

I kept my face void of any emotion like I’ve been used to, but my head was a very jumbled place.

“It was okay.” I answered curtly, looking at anywhere but him. It wasn’t even like I’ve been able to look away from her since we left them alone.

“What- wait, are you even listening to me? And why do you keep staring at her?”

I returned my gaze back to Carson and he had a pointed look on his face as though he was trying to figure me out.

“There’s nothing, let’s go. And I wasn’t staring at her, I was just thinking about something.” I lied smoothly, keeping my hands in my pockets and walking away.

I don’t know what that girl has over me, I shouldn’t even be thinking about her at all. I would have really allowed that rogue to kill her that day in the bush because I thought it was just two rogues fighting.

But suddenly, panic surged through me and I felt the urgent need to save her on that day. I’ve never felt that obligated to save someone, it was almost like a part of myself would die if I didn’t save her.

It clearly wasn’t a mate bond, it can’t even be a mate bond at all. I’ve met my fated mate and second chance mate, and they both rejected me. They were both high ranking females in their packs, none of them wanted an outcast or rogue.

Getting a second chance mate is even only possible out of luck, talk less of getting one the third time. So, whatever the pull is between us, it really isn’t normal.

“You smelt like her when you came back upstairs yesterday, Killain. Please tell me it’s not what I’m thinking, are you f*cking around with her?”

I gave him a very hard glare that he apologized immediately, bowing his head to show more emphasis too.

“I’m not f*cking around with her, and you should mind your business.” I snapped at him then walked towards my room, having it in mind to have my bath.

“You can snap at me all you want, Killain. But we both know that whatever you think you’re doing won’t work. She’s clearly not in your level, and what if she really is a spy? What if-“ he wasn’t able to finish that sentence before I lost it completely.

“Shut the f*ck up, Carson! You don’t know anything about this, just keep it that way. It’s none of your business.” I yelled at him.

“I should have just known that something was wrong with the way you stared at her everywhere. That’s an unhealthy obsession and you know it. You both can’t work.”

“I don’t think I ever told you that I needed an advice. Just get the f*ck out of my room already.” I growled at him.

“I’m not going anywhere till you tell me what exactly you feel for her. If anything happens, we’ll both bear the consequences too.”

I stared hard at him, giving him the darkest one I could muster. Anyone would scramble away with that kind of stare, and even he looked like he wanted to look away, but he maintained confidence.

“You’re really slipping, Killian. This is obsession and it’s not healthy-“ I cut him off.

“It’s not obsession.” I argued.

“Have you even seen the way you look at her? I’m sure a lot of the members would have noticed it by now. She got here when? A week ago? And you said it’s not unhealthy?” He asked.

“It’s not obsession, but what I feel is also not safe. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it.” I told him.

“Maybe it’s time for us to send her away, before any more damage is done.”

“No. She’s not leaving the pack.” I answered defensively, shocking even myself.