Darkest Desires

Chapter 11: Tell Tale part 1

My body hurt in ways I never knew it could that night. I had woken up at what I assumed was three in the morning because my usual alarm had gone off. The second I hadn't seen Ethan beside me I almost thought I dreamt the entire thing but the subtle pain between my thighs told me otherwise.

When I heard noise coming from the bathroom relief flooded through me. I don't know why it brought me comfort that he had not left right after stripping my virginity from me. When he emerged from the bathroom, his eyes seemed determined on one thing. Me.

It wasn't long till he was on top of me, my heart had nearly halted in its pace as he appeared naked before me. His c**k was pointing in my direction but slightly to the left, I saw the sinew that started from below his belly button and ended at his pink tip. It was long and thick, the tip was glistening with some fluid. For just a split second I wanted to know what he would taste like in my mouth. The moment it twitched I could feel my arousal start to build, he was definitely a sight for sore eyes.

I licked my lips parting them to allow some air, he seemed to lose his last resolve as he came after me.

I wish I could say it didn't hurt the second time but it did just not as much as the first though. He started out gently as he kissed my neck, my sternum, my breasts. I wondered why he couldn't kiss me on my lips, I wanted him to I found myself admitting. He continued to build me again, rubbing my c**t in slow rhythmic circles coercing moans from my lips. He buried his head right where my neck and shoulder met, his teeth sunk into the skin of my shoulder as he started to slowly slide inside me. It hurt almost the same and I considered pushing him off me.

"f**k" he whispered in my ear. Lodging himself deeper inside me.

I couldn't even form a solid audible sentence the only thing my mouth was capable of doing was moaning and screaming occasionally.

"I can't" the feeling of him was overwhelming, I felt like I was splitting in two.

"you can and you will" he responded, his lips pressed against my forehead as he finally became completely submerged.

His thrusts were unyielding, fast, hot and sharp. I was screaming.

I was screaming for a long time, all my senses were scattered and I could only focus on how he was making me feel.

I knew one thing for sure, we weren't just having s*x, we were f*****g. I never thought I'd lose my virginity this way, being f****d like a little wanton b***h and I was hoping I wouldn't spend my life regretting it. But a part of me knew that would be the case, Ethan and I weren't anything more than just two people who had reasons to hate each other.

Even though his reasons were clearly deluded, there was nothing tying us together romantically. This was his way of messing with me, f*****g me was just another thing ticked off his list and I gave in all too willingly.

"do you feel that?" he grunted, gripping my hips firmly. I didn't respond, I could barely comprehend any words spoken to me.

"tell me virgin, do you feel that? It's me, only me who can make you come apart. Not Damien, not Stephen. No one but me"

"please... I don't think. Think. I can take it" it was a plea

"tell me what you need?"

"... To come. Please"

"beg nicely and I'll let your pretty little p***y come around me"

Why did hearing that turn me on, the usual sweet talk with a hint of sin. It made my walls clench around his length in a greedy manner.

I heard him stifle a low groan and curse under his breath.

When he began slow steady thrusts my senses went into over drive I almost thought I'd die.

"beg me baby" I had almost forgotten his demand.

"please make me come. Master" I dug my nails into the surface of his back.

His hands tugged at my hair, his fist collecting a bundle and his body went still, he pulled out slightly and plunged back in. That one move was my undoing. A low throaty moan echoed from me by his action. My back arched off the bed and I clang to him for dear life as my body shook right beneath him.

His breathing was laboured as was mine, I was fighting for my vision to be restored.

"now you'll remember where you belong" he breathed, his warm breath against my neck, tickling my already over sensitized skin.

I could barely respond to his statement, maybe because of the orgasmic bliss or the confusion that momentarily clouded my mind. Oh Ethan.

***

Someone was shaking my body, a bit too rough no less with about zero regard for my sleep. I was completely consumed with exhaustion I felt like even if I slept the entire day it wouldn't cut it.

"wake up" it was lilys' voice. Panic immediately ran through my system. How, when, huh? Every ounce of sleep dissipated from my body.

My thoughts quickly rushed to Ethan. My eyes opened wide and I Jack knifed off the bed, regret flooding me instantly.

Lilys' green eyes widened and her mouth opened in shock. Oh s**t.

"what the hell happened to you?" she looked at me like I was a corpse or something. Fear etched in her eyes as she stared nervously at me prompting me to speak.

"did he do this to you? I never thought he'd be the kind of guy I swear I'm going to beat-

" Lily stop" I spoke as she balled a fist.

"what the hell do you mean? You look like you went through hell and back" I didn't dare look at my body because I knew the marks I'd find.

"it's not what you're thinking" her lips set in a grim line, her brows curving into a v as she stared at me accusingly. Her gaze taking me under scrutiny. If I knew lily she was probably planning a murder right about now.

"what I'm thinking is you have been subjected to a savage, what are those burns on your wrist? Elena what the hell?" I felt the blood warm up in my system as memories of last night flashed back.

"it wasn't him, it was... I trailed off closing my eyes and thanking the Lord she hadn't found him here.

" No" she gasped rising from the bed.

"Ethan?" she whispered as if the name was cursed or something, covering her mouth in disbelief. My silence was her answer.

" You're telling me Ethan was here last night? What about Damien and your date? I'm confused." she chewed her bottom lip as her eyes scanned me curiously, with slight apprehension.

"I can explain" I let out. Could I? The thought danced around in my head.

"by all means freckles" she crossed her arms and arced her eyebrow. Tapping her foot on the floor with her chunky boots.

"damien and I had a pretty fun date, he dropped me off and well we kissed-

" still doesn't explain you and the enemy"

She griped, glaring at me.

"let me finish, the date was fun but when I came up to my room I found Ethan waiting, he was mad that Damien and I went on a date much less kissed and I don't know how things just shifted but we, well, you know."

"I definitely know that happened the evidence is painted all over you skin, I'm just confused don't you and Ethan hate each other?" she gave me a perplexed look.

"I don't know lily"

She scoffed in disbelief, her eyes growing into thin slits.

"what do you mean you don't know?"

"clearly there's more between us" I scrubbed my hands over my face as frustration set in. Maybe a little regret too.

"no s**t sherlock, you see why I was concerned about whatever was going on between you two" she walked closer to me, plopping back down on the bed.

"I know, but I have no idea why he's doing this?"

"do you think there's an off chance he actually likes you" I snapped my head towards her so quick I nearly got whiplash.

She was wrong, Ethan didn't like me. He derived pleasure from tormenting me, mind f*****g me, blackmailing me and also apparently tying me up. This wasn't about him developing feelings towards me, it was more of revenge, punishment for actions that he only knew of.

"I highly doubt it lily" I pursed my lips thoughtful for a brief moment.

"then what is it? You're just going to be going at it with the boy you claim to despise?"

"no of course not-I shook off the memory of Ethan being so close, so naked, so perfect. He really was the devil.

- I'm going to get to the bottom of this"

"the bottom of why you two had s*x?" she rolled her eyes.

I smacked her shoulder. Gawd she could be annoying.

"to the bottom of why he thinks I'm the enemy, why he torments me and most of all why he'd sleep with me"

"why do I have a feeling this won't end well?"

We both looked at each other, staring anxiously at one another.

"because there's a ninety percent chance it won't" I breathed, tugging the fleece closer to my body.

"what's your plan freckles?" she chewed on her lip soaking in the information.

"I don't have it completely planned out, but I know I have to get to the bottom of his hate for me. I might just have to befriend him"

"befriend him?" she gave me a what the hell look.

"yes, I have to convince him I'm no longer what ever he thinks I am. Plus I have to keep my enemies close. Maybe just maybe he'll open up"

"like you did for him" she snickered, laughing a whole hardy laughter.

"Argh you're a douche sometimes you know" I shoved her, wrapping the fleece around my body. I nearly stumbled as I rose, sweet fudge my body hurts.

My eyes trailed over to the mirror, I didn't have any interest in staring at how Ethan had used my body as a canvas and painted his marks on me. But when I saw the blotches of plum and red I nearly went ghost.

I stared at my reflection in dismay, no wonder Lily was looking like I had been to hell and back. The most distinct ones trailed from the nape of my neck to where my sternum started. How don't I remember any of these.

I gently pressed against the bruises they stung, I swallowed hard and placed my hands on the counter as I kept staring at myself. Somehow my hair had started to re-curl, my skin was flushed and my eyes looked tired.

"lily!" I yelled cause I knew I was going to need help hiding these.

I was grateful for the various make up sets my mother would buy me from time to time, even though I barely had use for them. I just remember one time when I tried to cover my freckles.

I had never seen myself in such light, my skin looked like brown creamy porcelain but a part of me dreaded the feeling I felt. It wasn't me. I might have been insecure about my freckles since that day tobias called me freckles, but make up was no way to fix it.

Hiding my flaws didn't make them disappear it would have just showed how weak I was and that his opinion mattered. Only what I thought about myself mattered. My mom always told me that.

"lily can you get your ass in here!" I snapped and turned towards the open door. Why the hell was she taking long, it was practically a five step movement.

"Err. Elena who's this?" she walked in holding what seemed like a polaroid photo. Her eyes were glued to the small piece of paper, she had it gripped between her two thumbs. Before she shoved it in my direction, my face crinkled with confusion. What the hell?

I looked at what would have seemed to be the perfect image of a picture perfect family.

There was a man, he was young with a large grin plastered on his face. He was wearing a black well tailored suit, it fit his well defined body like a glove. He was what I'd call handsome. His grey eyes were filled with a glint of mischief. He somewhat looked familiar I could have sworn I'd seen him. Somewhere. When my eyes trailed to the two boys beside him I nearly lost my s**t!

"lily this looks...

" I know!" she yelled and covered her mouth.

My eyes kept pouring over the picture. My brain practically short circuited. I could never forget that expression. It was the same glare I received in the park, same stare he'd give me when he looked my way. But who was the other boy?

"But look Elena this photo was cropped" lily pointed over it, on the right side of the photo, where the other young boy with the big brown eyes stood. He looked sympathetic like he didn't want to be there. I finally saw the arm that belonged to the person that had been cropped out of the photo. It was a womans' hand I could tell because of the large emerald ring that embodied the slim pale fingers.

"we both know for sure that's Ethan" lily spoke. I could barely articulate any words yet. Confusion swamped me.

"Elena say something" she stared at me wide eyed, she was chewing her bottom lip and pacing.

"what do you want me to say?" I took in a few steadying breaths. I had no idea what was happening in this picture but from what I could tell.

This was clearly a young Ethan, with who I assumed was his father. I couldn't quite remember Mr. Sullivan but this man definitely embodied what Ethan would look like if he were in his early thirties.

But who was the blonde boy and the woman? Could it be his mother. Margaret. Was her name, from what I read in her note she abandoned him. I felt my head start to throb just from thinking about it.

"how do you have the picture?" lily prompted.

"I think Ethan must have left this behind"

"do you know who the other kid is? I think that must be Ethans dad the resemblance is scary. Looks like a before and after picture" she kept pacing. My eyes started following her movement and the more I watched her the more anxious I felt.

"stop pacing will you"

"sorry I'm nervous, I feel like we've stumbled upon something we weren't meant to see"

She wasn't wrong. I felt the exact same way, he must have left this last night.

"yeah I feel the same way too, I think we should give it back" I looked at her for approval, the last thing I needed was burying myself into Ethans history but maybe I could use this as leverage. I don't know why a part of me felt like I needed answers. Maybe I could use this to my advantage in a way.

"what's that look on your face?" she stared anxiously at me. I liked how she could read me so well it came in handy during the right situations but it wasn't always to my advantage.

"don't worry lily. It's nothing"

"Elena I'm the last person you can lie to so spill the damned beans"

I inwardly sighed.

"I think I can use this to my advantage. Somehow. I don't know yet. Maybe I can find out more about him you know. Understand why he's become this way just something. No one really knows much about Ethans life"

She was thoughtful for a brief moment, placing both her hands on either sides of her waist. Then she proceeded to pace.

"are you sure you want to go down that road. You might discover things you wish you didn't?" she wasn't wrong. No one knew much about Ethan and if no one knew then there was a good reason it must have been kept hidden. I had no idea why I got the strong urge to find out what ever was happening in this picture.

Lily gave me a desperate look, likes she wasn't for the idea. But I knew she also knew she couldn't talk me out of it. If anything she was inclined to help me. Plus she had lived here long before I did how come she never knew anything.

"do you know anything about Ethans' parents?" she paused, thoughtful for a moment and then continued pacing. She placed two fingers against her lips as if deciphering some internal puzzle.

"May white might be a small town but I don't know much. Although, I do know his dad got remarried when we were in 4th grade. I remember how my mother had made a fuss about their wedding. How she wished she had something like that."

What! Well all this was news to me. Ethan had a step mother? I remembered the picture I saw of his father with a young woman in it. Was that his step mom? And then again there was the woman in the large portrait frame who he resembled. His real mom. She had to be! Did his mother leave him after the divorce? I know for sure she abandoned him judging from the letter. I started to feel dizzy.

"so you're telling me you kept this to yourself?" she shrugged in a noncommittal way cracking a smile. I felt like flicking the picture on her head.

"in my defence Ethan was never topic between us until a few weeks ago" she huffed lifting her arms up in defeat.

Well she wasn't wrong on that part. It's amazing how much can change in so little time. I mean if you told me last week that I was going to lose my virginity to Ethan I wouldn't have believed it in the slightest but here we are.

"so you know nothing about his real mom?" I pushed on, a part of me wanted to know more.

"no, not really. But I heard my mother talk about how Mr. Sullivan was a victim of love, like her. I never knew what she meant. But I figured it might have something to do with the fact that my dad cheated on her"

Victim of love? It was true that Lilys' mom had been cheated on by her father. That was the reason for their divorce and precisely why lily was hesitant with love, but I believed she didn't have to deprive herself like that.

That's why I was happy that she was happy with tobias, it meant that she was trying . Something deep within me told me they truly belonged.

"will you do me a favour?" I eyed her from her reflection in the mirror as I turned to inspect the love bites.

"what?" she finally released her lip and folded her arms.

"I need you to hint about this when you're with Tobias. Not directly telling him we found a picture just asking him if he knows anything about Ethans mom"

"argh Elena I'm going to gauge out your eyes if this all goes to s**t"

"relax you'll be fine. I'm the one who should start counting my lucky stars if I make it through"

We both giggled. I knew I was setting myself up for something. I just had no idea what the end result would be.

"I'll do my best. But at least before that happens get clean so we can cover those up. The last thing you need is your mother questioning you"