Nocturnal Meetings of the Misplaced

5. Other than Saturday

Chapter 5Other than SaturdayI’m not going to lie. I liked the rush of looking at Hailee. We never talked, except for an occasional “hello” by our lockers. School was just a place I had to go to. After school, I usually went to Finn’s. Somedays, I took Isabella to Finn’s house with me. All the little ones ran around like a big, happy daycare. We stuck in kid-friendly movies, nothing too intense, movies like Rush Hour, Transformers, and The Lion King, and just hung out.

The kids would climb on Finn, pretending he was a windy tree. He’d sway back and forth trying to balance himself. He had this way of making them laugh. He acted like an overgrown toddler and they loved him. Seeing him enjoy them so much made me enjoy being with Isabella more.

His mom looked like a teenager, in a way, with a few wrinkles drawn on. She had long blond hair that she would wear in braids or pigtails. She was in her bed a lot, with the TV blaring, or on her cell phone. Her bed also doubled as a makeshift changing station. A large jar of A and D Ointment and a box of baby wipes sat on the bedside table.

His mom pulled her braids out. Working her fingers through her crimped waves, she announced, “It’s my brock time. I love you, boys!” She had an accent and always pronounced “break,” “brock.” I figured she was Swedish but hadn’t asked Finn about it until I noticed a picture of his mom hanging up in the hallway. She looked young in the photo, maybe nineteen.

“Where’s your mom from?”

“She’s from Iceland. My dad met her when he was in the navy. He’s from Summertime. He married my mom and brought her here when she was pregnant with me. I could have been born in Iceland.”

“Have you ever been there?”

“Nah, I wish.”

I saw a few photos of his little brothers and sisters hanging in the hall, but none of Finn. Then I noticed a big silver frame with the photo of a boy, around our age, in it. He had a large moon face and slits for eyes. “Who’s the ugly kid?” I asked.

“That’s Mudget,” Finn casually replied.

I laughed a little. “Sorry, but your family hangs up a picture of your bully. That’s messed up.”

“Mudget’s my stepdad’s son.”

I couldn’t really read his expression. Mudget was his stepbrother? Weird.

“Does that mean Mudget visits?” I wondered out loud.

“He used to, but he hasn’t lately. My stepdad mainly complains about having to pay child support.”

That may have explained why his stepbrother had it out for him. He must have thought Finn was stealing his father-son moments. All he was really getting was his beatings.

When Finn’s stepdad Sheriff Bears would come home, the entire mood of the house darkened. Before Polar Bear would come home at five, Finn’s mom would rush in the kitchen on high alert and start cooking.

First and foremost, Polar Bear was a giant. His hair was a peculiar, pale blond. It was the same hair color that all his birth children had inherited. On the little ones, it looked shiny and wholesome. His bleached blond mane, cut too short, made him look more menacing. His powder-blue eyes added to his intimidating persona.

He told me, “Call me Polar Bear. That’s what everybody calls me if I’m not on duty.” With his size and almost-white hair color, I could see the resemblance. And it seemed everyone in this weird town had a nickname. He bragged, “I’ve been sheriff for ten long years. Let someone try to screw with my town.”

Finn’s little brother’s horseplay elevated a notch when their father came home. Three-year-old Gunther and two-year-old Aaron jumped on the expensive sectional until it quaked. The plush material was already ripping at the seams. Polar Bear looked on with approval until one of the boys cried.

His stepdad arrived home at five o’clock sharp. Isabella and I would leave. A lot of times, Finn would come with us and hang out for a while at Holden and Reese’s place.

Life with Holden and Reese was calm, for the most part, even boring. One evening when I went upstairs to get a snack, I heard Reese sending Isabella to her room. I froze in my tracks. Holden asked Reese, “What’s going on?”

“She gave her doll a bath in the kitchen sink, over the clean dishes!” Reese exclaimed.

“Come on honey, that’s what little girls do. You could just use the dishwasher,” Holden said, trying to calm her.

“And Tommy keeps wearing his shoes inside and I tell him not to. Finn takes his shoes off, but his socks are filthy. Why did we get new carpet?” Reese broke into tears, only collecting herself enough to say, “You know I like them, but I want our own babies.”

I told myself I would help more. Still, I waited; until I was sure they’d left. I slipped my sneakers off, dropping them off the side of the railing where they landed in two, small thuds on the downstairs’ floor. I crept into Isabella’s room. She rested on her bed, not sleeping, just pouting.

“Listen, Isabella, we’re going to have to be good. If Reese tells you not to do something, don’t do it. You know they can send us to a worse place. A place where people beat us and even starve us to death.”

Her baby teeth carved into her bottom lip and she started crying. Of course, she cried. I had terrified her. I knew I shouldn’t have put that pressure on her, but I couldn’t stop. “Just be good, okay?”

I shut up, sitting at the end of her bed, sulking in the realization that I was a bad person. After a couple minutes, Isabella stopped crying and wrapped her arms around herself in a type of self-hug. I squeezed her foot in a lame attempt at an apology.

The phone rang and a minute later Holden came in, saying, “It’s your mom,” and handed Isabella the phone. After only seconds, she happily gushed, “I love you, too, Mommy.”

I scrambled to my feet with an overwhelming eagerness to be upright and paced back and forth. I waited. I wanted to tell my mom I hated her. I wanted to tell her I loved her. I wanted to say so much.

Finally, I got my turn. “Mom,” I exhaled into the receiver.

Each word from my mother trickled out as hot and cold as ever. “Oh, Tommy. I miss you. I’m working on things. Mandatory d**g tests are an invasion of privacy. What about my rights?”

“I would do it for you and Izzy.” From the background noise, it sounded like she was on a busy street or a bar. “Where are you, Mom?”

“Alex posted my bail. I’m staying with him.”

He happened to be an ex-boyfriend and d**g dealer. I moaned, “Great. You’re never going to get us back.”

I got quiet and we said goodbye.

I ran my knuckles along my jawline and worked hard not to cry. Guys with soccer moms could never understand. No girl had the power to break your heart, the way your mom can.

Izzy said she was going to color our mom a picture and I slipped off to my basement dwelling. I felt the relief of my bed. Feeling like I had more to say, I called Carlos, but he couldn’t talk long. Lately, he liked to text me about a girl he met at his cousin’s quinceañera. I could sense us drifting apart. We hung out best in front of a TV with something to smoke, which sounded good right about now.

So, I called my only other good friend, Simon Hall. My mom had lived with his dad on and off for years, and he became like a big brother. We didn’t have much to say either, but he told me if it got bad where I was, he would come and get me and Izzy. I told him things were alright and we ended the call. I closed my eyes, feeling mentally tapped.

When I looked up, Isabella hesitated by the doorway. “Do you want to see the picture?”

“Sure.” I sat up.

She sauntered over and handed it to me. I stared at a Tinkerbell with her rainbow hair, and yellow face, colored mostly inside the lines. I told her it was “very creative,” and handed it back to her. She lingered there, rocking on the balls of her feet as if she wanted something.

“What, Izzy?”

“Can we cuddle?”

“Okay.” I laid back, patting the spot next to me.

Izzy carefully set the coloring page on a TV tray next to my half-eaten bubble bologna sandwich. She climbed on top of me, her breath warm against my neck.

I smiled. She never held a grudge. “It will be fine, Izzy.” I wanted to believe this, but I felt flat inside.

Next Saturday night Finn trickled the lighter fluid into the flames making them shoot up in a fierce blue. I was again huddled next to Annie, our hips touching, when she suggested I either share one embarrassing thing about myself or say what I thought was the stupidest curse word. It seemed kind of random.

I chose the easier challenge. “The most ridiculous curse word is MF.” I couldn’t bring myself to say the actual word with the girls there. “The f-bomb alone makes a statement but adding “mother” in front of it seems too dramatic.”

Grinning, Silence decided to answer, “I can’t spell the word eleven and I don’t want to.”

“What a rebel,” Finn teased, adding, “I could name more embarrassing things about you, Silence Harper.”

She jumped on him and wrestled him to the ground. He enjoyed the beating.

Annie shook her head at them, telling me, “They’re always like that.”

Finn lying flat down with Silence on top of him, her knees positioned to the sides of his waist, when he blurted out, “Silence can’t tell time!”

“I hate you, Finn.” She got up and sat next to me, fixing her disheveled hair.

Finn got up, plopping down beside her on the ground and softly moaned, “Now I’ve got more wood.”

“p*****t,” Silence mumbled.

“Aren’t you late a lot?” I asked her. Silence smacked me in the arm.

I liked not thinking about anything too serious. It was easy to be with them. This time the dark wisps of smoke looked like winding roads. I could go anywhere.

I began to wait for Saturdays and our nocturnal meetings. It was an after-school activity for kids who didn’t join after-school activities. It was a social gathering for kids like me who didn’t play a sport or have any real interest or talents I guess. It could become a kind of regular thing with no rules or expectations.

At the same time, I sensed I couldn’t cross the line with Silence because she was young, and Finn had an unspoken thing for her. I didn’t want to get in the middle of some weird love triangle. Also, I wouldn’t be here long, so Finn should get the girl. Usually, I would get hung up on a girl like Hailee, a girl who was completely safe and utterly unattainable. After all, she was clearly out of my league.

Monday brought even more cold. The sunlight reflected off the newly fallen snow like sequins. Through the frosted windows on the bus, everything had an incandescent glow. I fell into an easy conversation with Annie and Finn about cereal while Silence slept. Wiping the window with my sleeve, I became entranced by the descending flakes— silent, soft, and seemingly without end. Finally, the bus pulled into the parking lot. Annie thought of another important topic as we lined up. “Do you prefer a crunchy or a soft-baked cookie?”

A sleepy-looking Silence chimed in, “I would throw a crunchy cookie to the wall. Death to the crunchy cookie. Soft-baked all the way.”

“Yup,” I agreed.

“Man, Silence, you’re such a hater,” Finn said.

We shuffled in tender steps, in no real hurry. Tiny flecks of snow clung to the line of trees right outside the school and dusted the sidewalks like powdered sugar.

It looked beautiful, like Hailee, who lingered by our lockers. “Hey Tommy, lovely spring weather, huh?”

“The weather, yeah. I was just thinking that.” Did it even make sense?

She kept talking. “I was wondering if you want to go to the Spring Dance with me?”

I couldn’t say a word. I was in shock. Even my automatic system failed me. I ceased to breathe, and my heart may have skipped a beat. Somehow, I had bought into her small-town celebrity. Finn appeared at his neighboring locker. I gave him a desperate look as if he could help me, but he only offered me a shrug.

“It’s a turnabout dance. You know, the girls ask the boys.” She explained. It seemed impossible. Was she asking me out? After an uncomfortable pause, she asked, “Do you want to go with me?”

“Yeah, I do,” I managed to say.

Hailee smiled at me for a second. “Okay. It’s a date.” Gathering her books, she walked away.

Finn exclaimed, “Wow! You are the luckiest guy in the world. I hate you.” He shook his head, throwing me a thin smile as he slammed his locker shut. A glint came to his eyes when he turned and faced me. “I didn’t even know you could dance.”

“I have to dance?” More panic set in.

“I don’t know. They might do that kind of thing at a dance.” His voice was drenched in sarcasm.

The day weirded on from snow in spring and Hailee asking me out, to other curious events. Kids in the hall happily called out “Chicago” to me when I passed by. I overheard more girls calling me cute as I walked out of the bathroom after third hour. I was not only invited to Hailee’s table at lunch but accepted by her friends.

Hailee and I sat down at an empty table on the same plastic, orange chairs that we’d had at my old school. We both just set our trays down when she said, “You know, I’m glad Finn got his friends back. They were too scared to sit by him when Mudget was here.” My eyes scanned the cafeteria until I spotted Finn sitting by a couple of guys.

“Really?”

“Yeah, he sat by himself for the longest time until you came,” Hailee added.

Brandon, the nickname guy, took a seat next to me, tapping his fingers on the table. “What’s up, Chicago?” He was the type of guy who bubbled over with excessive energy.

“Hey,” I said and stuck my straw in my chocolate milk. A kid approached the table holding a tray when Brandon popped up and grabbed him by the elbow, telling him, “You owe me big time.” They sat down and started to talk.

Another cute girl sat down. Hailee introduced us. Her name was Kelly and Brandon’s friend’s name was Lucas. He was tall and lanky, with a trendy haircut. He casually flicked a few fingers at me as he was introduced. A couple other kids joined us, but I didn’t get their names.

They were Abercrombie and Fitch kind of kids. Finn explained that most of the kids, at what he dubbed the “popular table,” lived in the only nice subdivision in Summertime. It was called Lake in the Hills. It was even gated.

Brandon turned to face me. “Wilds has been monopolizing you, bro. You need to hang out with us.” I guess Finn’s nickname was his last name if that counts.

“Hey, Tommy, you’re from Chicago. Did you live in one of those high-rises with a doorman?” Kelly asked, moving her chef salad around with her fork.

“No. Just an apartment.” I could even pretend to be that guy.

“Why did your family move here?” Hailee asked.

I paused. A lump formed in my throat. I had to invent something. For some reason, The Fresh Prince of Bel Air popped in my head. “My mom wanted my sister and me to stay with my uncle. You know, to get away from the bad influences of the city.”

Brandon leaned in, suddenly interested. “Did you get in trouble or what?”

“No. It wasn’t like that.”

They bought it. Kelly Santoni decided, “You’re too sweet to get into trouble.” She liked her next idea more. “You know, it’s the quiet ones you have to watch out for.”

Brandon commented, “I bet you can get w**d easy there.”

“Be quiet,” Hailee told him. “You’re going to make him think we’re druggies.” Everyone was talking, but I didn’t say much. I felt like I was new to English and could only speak in polite conversation. You know, like hello, yes and no, cómo está kind of talk. I bit into my turkey sandwich, chewing and swallowing in rhythm with their conversation. No one seemed to care or notice. In fact, according to Kelly my lack of participation meant, “Tommy’s shy and down-to-earth.”

Hailee smiled and nodded in agreement.

Maybe I’d reinvent myself. I’d be a new and cool kid. Popularity was like wearing the most coveted shoes of your day. In my case, brand new Air Jordans. The only problem was the shoes didn’t fit me and by the end of the day, I had blisters. I still wanted the shoes, at least, a part of me did.