Not his first choice

chapter 4

Chapter 4

I stare at the list on my screen, my fingers hovering over the keyboard.

I’ve done thousands of tasks for Lucian over the years. Booked flights, handled billion-dollar negotiations, dealt with last-minute disasters that would send most people into a panic.

But this?

This feels different.

Each name on this list is a reminder of what I am—and more importantly, what I’ll never be.

I tell myself it doesn’t matter. That I’m just doing my job.

But for the first time in a long time, something inside me cracks.

I could put my own name on the list.

Just to see how it looks.

The thought is ridiculous. Desperate.

But before I can stop myself, I type it out.

Sienna Vale.

The cursor blinks at me, like it knows the truth.

I don’t belong on this list.

Lucian would never—

A knock on my office door startles me.

I delete my name instantly before calling out, “Come in.”

Sophie steps inside, her eyes sharp as they take me in. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

I let out a dry laugh. “More like I’ve seen reality.”

She crosses her arms, tilting her head. “Let me guess. The list?”

I exhale. “It’s done.”

“And?”

And Lucian is about to choose someone.

Someone that isn’t me.

“Nothing,” I say, forcing a smile. “It’s just work.”

Sophie doesn’t look convinced.

And deep down, neither am I.

Lucian’s office is quiet, the kind of quiet that makes my pulse thrum just a little harder.

He leans back in his chair, eyes scanning the printed list I handed him this morning. The list I spent far too long perfecting.

He’ll pick someone—one of the women whose background, ambition, and connections make her the perfect choice.

I remind myself that this was always the plan.

That I was never—could never be—an option.

Lucian sets the paper down, his expression unreadable. “Camilla Davenport.”

Something inside me goes still.

I nod, my voice perfectly steady. “A strong choice.”

Camilla is… perfect. The daughter of a media mogul. Beautiful, intelligent, the kind of woman who fits seamlessly into his world.

The kind of woman who deserves his attention.

Lucian’s gaze flicks up to me, studying me in that sharp, precise way of his. “You don’t seem surprised.”

I force a small smile. “I wouldn’t be very good at my job if I was.”

His jaw ticks slightly, like he’s searching for something in my expression.

I don’t let him find it.

“I’ll set up the first meeting,” I continue smoothly. “She’ll be expecting your call.”

Lucian doesn’t respond right away.

Instead, he watches me for a beat too long.

Something in the air shifts.

Tightens.

“Thank you, Sienna.”

The words are simple. Professional.

But for some reason, they scrape against something raw inside me.

I rise to my feet, smoothing down my dress. “Always.”

And just like that, it’s done.